obrienj Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 My girlfriend of a year and a half recently broke up and she decided that there is still too much emotion between us to be friends. She left it at she will contact me when she is ready to, but with her birthday coming up next weekend, should I send a simple text message wishing her a Happy Birthday or some tulips & a card with a simple birthday wish? I was also wondering if I should have them delivered a few days before her birthday or on the day of her birthday? Or should I just not do anything to acknowledge her birthday and respect her wishes of waiting for her to contact me again? Would that make a woman angry? Any help is appreciated. Thanks Link to post Share on other sites
a4a Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 What part of : She left it at she will contact me when she is ready to do you not understand? Now are you wanting to really send this gift for her benefit or for your own benefit? IMHO ....... leave her alone as she has asked you to. No does mean NO. Link to post Share on other sites
Josalina Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 i am going through the exact prob, been with a man 4 2 and a half years, miss and still love him, its his bday at the end of the month, do i send a card and no present to prove a point i still thought of him but not enough to send a present or do i leave him as asked? i think if he contacts me first then i prob wud if not i will leave him to find himself as asked, or in ur case she asked u to leave her till she contacts u. not recieving anything will made her realise what she has done. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 My girlfriend of a year and a half recently broke up and she decided that there is still too much emotion between us to be friends. She left it at she will contact me when she is ready to, but with her birthday coming up next weekend, should I send a simple text message wishing her a Happy Birthday or some tulips & a card with a simple birthday wish? I was also wondering if I should have them delivered a few days before her birthday or on the day of her birthday? Or should I just not do anything to acknowledge her birthday and respect her wishes of waiting for her to contact me again? Would that make a woman angry? Any help is appreciated. Thanks Don't do anything whatsoever! That will be the greatest gift you could give to YOURSELF! Any gift at all will mean nothing at all to the other person and may rise to the status of nuisance and aggravation. FORGET HER! NO GIFTS...NO NOTHING!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Amour77 Posted October 2, 2006 Share Posted October 2, 2006 This sounds like a bit of a joke.... In any case, I think it would be better not to acknowledge her birthday. The two of you are finished. Why would you offer her anything for her birthday? If you send her a card or anything, she might resent it and might not understand why you are doing it. If she said no contact, just leave her alone! Unless maybe you want to boost your ego.... Link to post Share on other sites
gfto Posted October 3, 2006 Share Posted October 3, 2006 I think you should go with the flowers, along with, perhaps, some sort of expensive jewelry, and a really sappy "I miss you," sort of card. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted October 3, 2006 Share Posted October 3, 2006 You need to at least get her something better than the guy she is now dating... Just let her B-day go without any gifts or smoke signals... Link to post Share on other sites
SUMMER 1969 Posted October 3, 2006 Share Posted October 3, 2006 If I were you I would not get her anything, I promise you she will think of her birthday last year and know she was with you.. I know it will be hard not to get her anything, but you need to stay strong and just leave her alone.. You know I just got done reading the post on how to win someone back, read some of what that man was saying.. If you want someone back, you kind of need to play hard to get and let that other person know that you can live without them.. If you get her a gift, she will know she still has you and she will not want you then.. I don't know why, but it seems like you need to play games with people in order to win.. I am not a game player and that is why I always get the broken heart.. Trust me.. I don't think games are fair, but no one said life was fair either.. I wish you the best of luck and just know we are all here for you Link to post Share on other sites
uncertainofwhoiam Posted October 9, 2006 Share Posted October 9, 2006 i think you should - don;t be overly lovey dovey - but let her know you rememberd and still care for her. Hope she is well and wish her happy birthday wishes. Link to post Share on other sites
neiu Posted October 9, 2006 Share Posted October 9, 2006 screw it...do nothing. she doesn't want anything to do with you so why even contact her or say anything. if they don't care enough to talk to you now they're not going to care enough if you send them a happy bday wish. think of it this way, ever know someone who you don't particularly want to talk to who knows it but for some reason still talks to you? annoying isn't it? thats how she's going to feel. plus if you send something and you don't hear from her, how are you going to feel? not very good i assume as it eats you up inside as to if she got it or not, or if she liked it or whatever you are thinking. in the end, it doesn't matter. she said it herself, if she wants to talk, she'll let you know. and not doing anything especially for her bday might just tweak her to do something about it if she misses you that much. hey look at it this way, you save money on the present and gifts and also the effort on actually having to make a card or whatever. sounds like a good deal to me. even better, buy yourself a gift with the money you saved and make it a new beginning in your life. Link to post Share on other sites
Spurned Posted October 9, 2006 Share Posted October 9, 2006 I agree with the other poster--usually these kind of questions are motivated by your fear of losing your ex because you didn't acknowledge a birthday or some other special event. Let your ex see that you respect her boundaries. You don't want to be with a woman who would expect a gift even if she broke up with you, do you? There is no magical gift that will make her see how wonderful you are. The only thing that truly does that (to a woman who isn't materialistic, mind you) is your absence. Save the money and buy some cute redhead a drink next time you go out with your buddies. Link to post Share on other sites
Josalina Posted October 9, 2006 Share Posted October 9, 2006 lol lots of mixed messages, well what do you do if you still talk and are friend but want them back? Link to post Share on other sites
Rooster_DAR Posted October 10, 2006 Share Posted October 10, 2006 lol lots of mixed messages, well what do you do if you still talk and are friend but want them back? Did you say 42 or 4 1/2 years? My B-day is at the end of this month too. Link to post Share on other sites
climbergirl Posted October 10, 2006 Share Posted October 10, 2006 My girlfriend of a year and a half recently broke up and she decided that there is still too much emotion between us to be friends. She left it at she will contact me when she is ready to, but with her birthday coming up next weekend, should I send a simple text message wishing her a Happy Birthday or some tulips & a card with a simple birthday wish? I was also wondering if I should have them delivered a few days before her birthday or on the day of her birthday? Or should I just not do anything to acknowledge her birthday and respect her wishes of waiting for her to contact me again? Would that make a woman angry? Any help is appreciated. Thanks Going against the grain............... Seeing that you recently broke up, I'd say send her a card (via snailmail) and just sign your name (no-love, xxxx). It's respectful, yet says nothing. Link to post Share on other sites
climbergirl Posted October 10, 2006 Share Posted October 10, 2006 But no flowers!! Link to post Share on other sites
Josalina Posted October 10, 2006 Share Posted October 10, 2006 what date in this month is your birthday rooster? my ex's is the 29th. i had been with him for 2 and a half years lol sorry when i put 'for' i typed it as the number 4. Link to post Share on other sites
Rooster_DAR Posted October 10, 2006 Share Posted October 10, 2006 what date in this month is your birthday rooster? my ex's is the 29th. i had been with him for 2 and a half years lol sorry when i put 'for' i typed it as the number 4. My B-day is the 25th. Me and my EX were together 4 and 1/2 years. Link to post Share on other sites
Josalina Posted October 10, 2006 Share Posted October 10, 2006 well i will do u a thread on the 25th especially 4 u roost 2 say happy birthday. hows things with u now? 4 and a half years, ouch! cor thats tough, has it got any easier for u with nc? Link to post Share on other sites
breal Posted October 11, 2006 Share Posted October 11, 2006 Josa, my exes is also on the 29th. Someone else asked the question "What if you're still friends"? Me and my ex split 2 months ago, haven't seen eachother since (we are now 7 hours apart) and agreed to meet mid Nov to see how things go. She still calls everyday/every other day. And frankly, still acts like my gf, minus the distance. Last year, I took her on a vacation for her birthday, and she was in tears with joy telling me how "no one has ever made her feel that special on her bday". Just told me this again, about a week ago. So, what would be an appropriate gift? Just a card? I can't not send her anything, or I would look like a complete ******* considering we are still very close. Link to post Share on other sites
Josalina Posted October 11, 2006 Share Posted October 11, 2006 i know how u feel, if u aren't together just buy her something nice and thoughtful, however don't let it top last year when u were together as it will make her remember what she could of had. tell her is just a little something now u r friends. do u actually want her back mid nov when u met up? i would buy perfume as this will be a constant reminder of u, however if u still want to get rid of her as a gf then get choc's as we all know in a few days they will be demolished lol so u still thought to buy her something, yet in a few days she hasn't got the reminder over her and hopefully she will back off a little. Link to post Share on other sites
breal Posted October 11, 2006 Share Posted October 11, 2006 Yes, I do want her back. I posted that situation in the "second chance" section if you want to take a look. lol, I dont have the time or energy right now to top her last birthday. Plus, it was extremely romantic. I wont be seeing her for her birthday this year, so I was just going to send a little something. Link to post Share on other sites
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