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My Husband is Going to Strip Clubs


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SpirituallyThere

My husband is going to strip clubs and spending $200 each time that he goes. He went the day after my birthday without even getting me a birthday gift. This has happened before and I have told him that it hurts me and that I don't want him to do it again.

 

Everytime I confront him, he tells me about all of the imaginary things that I have done to "cheat" on him. These include, going to happy hour and drinking too much with people from work, going on a business trip and going to dinner with my male counterparts that I am traveling with and receiving phone calls when we first met from recent boyfriends at the time. I also received a random phone call from a boyfriend from 20 years ago. Although, I was not unfaithful in any of these incidents, I apologized profusely and have vowed to change my behaviour. For instance, we changed our phone number, I do not go to happy hours anymore, and on business trips, I eat alone. I am so angry and hurt.

 

I am angry, hurt and want to separate. But, I can't because I don't have any rights to my step-daughter. She has been my daughter since she was 14 months old. I also really love my husband. I have the type of love that pulls at me and melts my heart. I almost feel like I would take anything from him. I don't think that this is healthy.

 

Right now, he thinks everything is okay, but I am still hurt. He has still not been completely honest with me. I keep bringing it up everyday and I don't want to obsess over it.

 

 

:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :( :( :( :( :(:sick:

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So you changed your behavior and the things you were doing, but he has yet to change his or stop what he is doing? That should speak volumes, however, has he said what the real reason is for why he is going to these strips clubs and spending this money? I highly doubt that the reasons he gave you are the real reasons, and even if there was some truth to them theres bound to be more to it than that. I say its time to put your foot down and tell him you all either pull together as a team and work on the marriage or you seperate until he gets his act together.

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So he expects you to be completely alone all the time while he goes and cheats on you at a strip club?

 

The first thing you need to do is start going to happy hours and stop eating alone. You never did anything wrong, he's justifying his bad behavior by blaming it on you.

 

It really sounds like as heartbreaking as it may be, separation is your best option. He does not sound like he wants to be in the marraige any more. He does not seem to care about you at all, you deserve better than this. He will continue to act this way as long as you allow it, and is most likely taking great joy in hurting you.

 

I'm really sorry this happened to you. Some people are so horrible, and the best and safest thing is to get as far away from them as you can. Good luck.

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"He will continue to act this way as long as you allow it"

 

I agree.. what he is doing is completely wrong and discusting. Your married... Tell him NOT to go.

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