he cheated on me with his ex twice

[Guest]

Well, we've been a couple for 3+ yrs. I never had a reason to question him or his where abouts until last year when he was suppose to come meet me at my house and never showed up. Well a friend called and told me she seen him. So she comes and takes me to this place where he is. I knock at the door and a female comes out. I knew he was there so I asked for him.

 

She went and got him. It was 12:30 in the morning. He comes outside and begains saying this is his friends house...blah, blah blah, then the girl comes out side, I noticed that he lowers his tone when she comes to sit on the porch. He eventually got in his car and pulled off. So I begain to speak with this female who tells me that they have been together over 5yrs. But she didn't even know that he had children....And I asked her, when do they get to spend time together, why are they never together on holidays and birthdays etc...she had nothing to say.

 

After a couple of days I decided to answer his calls. He tells me that they were together but when he met me, the relationship was ending. Nothing was going right and he soon fell in love with me. But could never really get rid of her....After about two months we started dating again. This year, I ended up talking to his ex (without his knowledge) over the phone, she tells me that they are still together and that he plans on moving in with her, and that she has a car in his name. ( he had just aggreed to sign my lease with me, but I told him that i didnt want him to) She says that they had sex about 3 weeks ago.

 

I told her that i was 3 or so months pregnant with his baby, and asked her was she planing on having children or marrying him, she laughed and says Hell no! She told me she doesnt trust him and knows that he was still with me, but anytime she calls, he goes running to her. She told me that he continues to lie about our realationship. But that she doesnt really want anything to do with him, but because this car is in his name they will have to be bothered with each other for the next couple of years.

 

Ofcourse he denies being sexually active with her, but he doesnt lie about the car situation. He said no one else could do it so he felt obligated. I told him that we would be better as friends, because I can't take this ex of his being a part of his life...He begs and begs and begs and says he know he has messed up, he is trying to do everything right and that he doesnt see her unless it has something to do with this car.

 

I want to trust him, I love him, I just can't understand why he won't let me leave. He keeps telling me he is going to marry me and stuff. And I'm like, I really can't see how this will work. I feel like she has controll over him or something. He tells me different ofcourse, but if I am not enough for him, I don't understand why he won't just let me end this realationship, he keeps saying that he loves me and he is going to prove it....I feel stuck.

[CrushedOrgans]

you're not stuck, and he's not in control letting you leave...you're just not leaving.

 

it seems like this guy can do anything he wants and you'll take him back. he knows it too, which is why he get away with everything and keeps doing it. it won't stop unless you kick him to the curb, and why wouldn't you? you're letting what you think is love get in the way of reality and holding onto something that isn't there.

 

i say, move on. you're so much better without him.

 

 

oh, and there are ways around dealing with a car in someone's name...but hanging out with the other person at midnight in their home doesn't take care of that problem.

[tikigods]

Why does he have to leave you? in fact why would he WANT to leave you, you are a doormat and he can walk all over you all he wants, he can cheat on you and no matter what you are going to be there for him to come back to...till he finds someone else to cheat on you with.