Green eyes Posted October 12, 2006 Share Posted October 12, 2006 Why is it that I read into things so much. If my girl doesnt call me back when she says she will. I get worried. It always has to be on the dot.Also when shes out on the town I always think that shes flirting or hooking up with some dude.But I dont ask questions or accuse her of anything. I think that could push her away if I did that. But anyway, I dont like to be like that. I always think of the worst that could happen. Does this mean Im self concious? How do I get over it? Link to post Share on other sites
Cheshire Cat Posted October 12, 2006 Share Posted October 12, 2006 Are you usually a jelaous person? Were you jealous with your ex-girlfriends as well? Or just with her? I'm asking because I think that when someone brings out new unpleasant traits of ours and we are experiencing insecurities or jealousy feelings that we can't really explain, it's a red flag - or at least a sign that we shouldn't be with that person. Is there any reason why you are worried when she goes out without you? Does she have an habit of not calling you when she said she would? This is not about jealousy, it's about manners. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Green eyes Posted October 12, 2006 Author Share Posted October 12, 2006 Are you usually a jelaous person? Were you jealous with your ex-girlfriends as well? Or just with her? I'm asking because I think that when someone brings out new unpleasant traits of ours and we are experiencing insecurities or jealousy feelings that we can't really explain, it's a red flag - or at least a sign that we shouldn't be with that person. Is there any reason why you are worried when she goes out without you? Does she have an habit of not calling you when she said she would? This is not about jealousy, it's about manners. I usually am a jealous person but I do NOT show it. I know how it could push them away. But I feel like I still show them like you can see it in my face.Another things is If I sense like shes not paying enough attention to me I get all worried and feel like she is not intrested in me anymore. I dont know what that is but it usually turns out to be fine. I think its just her personality. When she gets overwelmed with work or is very tired. I dont get any attention from her. And that is with just this girl. Any other girl i have given 2 craps about there affection.. What should I do? Link to post Share on other sites
Spectre Posted October 12, 2006 Share Posted October 12, 2006 Heres how i feel, if a person says theyre gonna call a certain time, they should. Now, I dont mean if someone says ill call at 6 they need to call AT 6. But, if i havent heard from them by atleast 6:15, thats annoying. A girlfriend is supposed to be thinking about you, so if she constantly says she'll call you at 6 and then you dont hear from her till 7-8, then somethings wrong. Obviously circumstances can prevent someone from calling, so i wouldnt be angry unless it happened constantly. so if she does it constantly, i think its a cause for concern. If anything else, its disrespectful to you Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 Well,here's the deal. You are insecure period. I'm not trying to be mean at all, but I have lived with someone like you for 10 years. If you don't say anything you definitly show it with body language. Once she gets to know your ticks she will see when you are jealous and insecure. You have to find ways to self talk to yourself and build up your self esteem. Even if she stays with you she will eventually get tired of trying to boost your ego all the time. Get some help. Feel good about you first before you make a commitment to someone. Resentment is awful. Good Luck to you. Link to post Share on other sites
Yamaha Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 You are a very insecure person. You will, at some point, accuse her and it could turn ugly. If you don't get some help for this you will drive her into another guys arms. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Green eyes Posted October 16, 2006 Author Share Posted October 16, 2006 I can understand were your coming from. But I have had some bad relationships in the past. I think this hurt me more then anything. I do not have low self esteem. I am really happy with my self its just girl that I dont trust because of my past with them. But I do probably still need to get help for this. I dont want to lose her thats for sure. She seems different from all the rest. Link to post Share on other sites
rosybifocals Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 i have gone through a lot of the same things you are saying. i am still going through them actually. i am afraid that i will push him away if i keep freaking out, but i cannot prevent that from happening. i want to give him space, but his behavior when i do that does not change, he seems the same if not more distant. it does stem from insecurity, in my case because we have trust issues...but, that is the primary focus. There are probably things your partner can do to help, but all i know is that you need to try and distance yourself, as hard as it is. believe me i go through the same thing, it seems impossible. good luck and try your best you might even want to talk to them in a different way than you usually do, or consider couples counseling Link to post Share on other sites
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