confuse about men

[Guest]

ok dated this guy for about a month 14 yrs ago.he never tried to touch me,kiss,nothing. he quit calling me,I was heart broken. Now, for the last couple yrs I've been working for him.We are both married, I have kids he doesnt.The last couple months he has been saying things like he messed up,my husband is a lucky man, that I need to go to a bar without my husband and he would buy me drinks.

 

Then a few day ago he said he wanted to get drunk and come see me,but my husband would me jealous.I do not comment because I do not want to take him seriosly. now to add to all this my husband at home tells me that we need to find a girl for a threesome, I got mad and he said he was joking.I do not think this is true. He thinks we need to try new things to be kinky.I don't agree. I have never slept with anyone beside my husband of 13 yrs. He recently got fixed. Now help me figure all this out. Does my husband want someone new and is my boss for real.

[syz]

The short answer is probably no and yes. Your husband probably doesn't want someone new as much as he wants the age old fantasy of two women and hey if they enjoy each other all the merrier. Your boss blew it and now regrets it and is dropping hints right and left that he would like to start something up.

[elijahBailey]

Ahhh, the lure of getting some attention from another guy. It must've been quite a while since you got this feeling, no? It's like a drug. You know it's gonna hook you, but the temptation is great. Then there's the extra push factor because you feel unattractive now your husband wants a threesome with another girl.

 

I hope you don't go for a quick fix.

[Gunny376]

You need to set both of these guys straight.

 

First the boss ~ your and his is strictly a working and professional relationship. Just that plain and just that simple, and your personal life is not open for discussion. Simple tell him, "That's personal and I prefer not to discuss it."

 

Me? I won't date anyone that works for the same company that I work for. Your personal life and your professional life are like to separate glasses of water ~ you pour one into the other ~ and one muddies the other. Since you've got a history with your boss, long term ~ I'd be planning an exit strategy and looking for another job. His comments and conduct is un-ethical, un-professional, and un-businesslike.

 

The husband? What he describes is a common male sexual fantasy. Fantasy is 99% of the time best left in the relam of fantasy, as fantasy seldom holds any sembalance to reality.

 

He wasn't just "kidding" he was testing the waters, to see if you were game about the idea. If I were you, I'd be letting him know what my bounderies are ~ clearly and concisely. In no un-certain terms.

[Flyin in Clouds]

... now to add to all this my husband at home tells me that we need to find a girl for a threesome, I got mad and he said he was joking.I do not think this is true. He thinks we need to try new things to be kinky.I don't agree.

 

First you can try kinky without other people... and that can be OK unless you are total prude.

 

But if your H wants an FMF threesome ask him how he'd feel about a MFM threesome. You, him and another guy...

 

I have never slept with anyone beside my husband of 13 yrs. He recently got fixed. Now help me figure all this out. Does my husband want someone new and is my boss for real.

 

Are you good looking? Then why wouldn't your boss want you? But he's setting himself up for a big lawsuit if he keeps pressing you against your wishes.

 

As to your husbands wanting something new, yes, sometimes men do and it' doesn't mean he doesn't love you anymore. It just means he'd like some variety. (Coolidge effect). After 13 years isn't sex getting a little repetitive and hence boring?

 

As to letting him know your bounderies, that's fine. But understand if those bounderies aren't what he wants to accept he might decide to leave. Irreconcilable differences. "Bounderies" have to be mutually agreed to.