georgejungle Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 Just need a place to vent... To sum up, i'm depressed and It's due to my hair loss. I've been a fairly self-concious person in my life and this REALLY doesn't help matters. I try and be a strong person, i tend to hide my fears and worries and not complain...But it's starting to eat away at me where i just want to bust. I'm not completely bald but i'm starting to get a bald spot on the back of my head and having had such a THICK head of hair when i was a young twenty something (i'm now an early 30 something) i can tell my hair is thinning and it bums me out. It bums me out because, i never really thought of myself as SUPER attractive, so now not only will i be average, but i'll be bald too. Annnnd rather than try and combat this and try doing things to maybe save my what hair i have or make myself look better in other departments, i've done the opposite and tried covering it up, i've gained weight since being depressed and eating whatever the hell i want, i've lost my drive to pursue a job in my dream goals and i've just been in a "whoa is me" kinda funk. It pisses me off, but i feel lost like i wouldn't know where to start if i wanted to get going on fixing myself. i don't want to get silly surgery or take pills to make my hair come back. maybe i'd take rogaine, but even that depresses me, having to add a tonic to my head twice a day to keep what i have...and would it be worth the trouble? ugh. i know i sound like a wussy. i'm just in a funk. i'll snap out of it eventually, i know i have it in me to do so, i just need a kick in the ass. Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 Man I feel your pain. Dito everything you said.My hair and my eyes were my best physical qualities. Not only did I have beautiful natural hair, but I had such a good sensibility about how to wear it. I was average lookng, but I was thin and with the styles I chose I could express myself and make myself sexy. Now I suck. At least I still have the eyes. When I can afford it I'm going to Bosley Medical. Have you thought about that? Link to post Share on other sites
Author georgejungle Posted October 16, 2006 Author Share Posted October 16, 2006 hey buddy, nice to know someone else is bummed out about their own hair and i'm not alone. it is TOTALLY an expression thing with me. I know i shouldn't care, but yeah, it leaves you with a feeling of "how the hell am i going to express myself and my style, now?" Bosley? not sure about that. I don't know about paying a bunch of money to fix my head. i'd rather wear beanies the rest of my life, but it'd suck. sometimes i think about going the Kerry King (from Slayer) or Scott Ian (from Anthrax) route and just get all Inked up, to take away the focus from my hair and express myself that way. who knows.... Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 You want a kick in the ass? Bald men are HOT! H O T, HOT! Yah sure, this might not be something you _wanted_ to happen, but neither is gray hair nor wrinkles or anything like that. But you make the best of what you got, and being bald is not the end of the world. There are PLENTY of women who find bald men hot. It's got that bad guy look to it. Be confident, dont try to do any sweep overs or hide it or anything, then you look stupid and people are not attracted to a man with no confidence. I would even recommend shaving it compeletely off! As for the weight, get back into an exercise routine. Bald sweaty man, OMG, Hello, can we say HOT? lol seriously, I think you already know ALL of this. You know there's more to beauty than what's on the surface. A lot of it has to do with your own perception of yourself, and the more you are confident, the more people are attracted to you. If you cannot like yourself, why should anyone else like you? pssst, bald men are hot Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 That sounds ugly as hell. I'd go for the surgery and just wear your hair really short and tight until you can afford it. Or if you don't like the idea of surgery then just try and stay in shape and dress nice (but continue to wear the hair tight-nothing uglier than a nappy scraggly balding head). I wear cologne alot more than I used to. I think I do it for expression reasons like I once could change my hair now I chang my scent? Don't know. Link to post Share on other sites
stoopid_guy Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 If you're like me, you're not really loosing hair, it's just migrated to your ears, back, shoulders, etc. Don't worry about it, just find yourself a lady with taste, like Dgiirl. Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 i AM single Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 I can empathize. No, actually I cant. I don’t feel in the least bit sorry for you. I am a woman and am experiencing hair loss. It is devastating. And I am in my twenties. I am on every known and medically proven treatment for it – which makes me drowsy and hypotensive, not to mention smelling like rotten eggs. I have even tried treatments like Propecia and other androgen-reducing meds exclusive to men. Until you are actually willing to go to these drastic measures to curb your hair loss, I think you should just shut up and stop whining. Your “problem” is obviously not serious enough for you to seek medical attention. Until then, get the **** over it and get on with your life. You are a man. All you have to do it shave your head and you are suddenly – not only socially acceptable – but HOT HOT HOT. Must be nice to attend your own pity party. Poor thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Amontillado Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Well pal, I mean pals, it happens to a lot of men and some women too. My experience is that women don't mind (hey, we're HOT!) I don't know about how I'd react to a woman with significantly thinning hair; with sympathy I hope. But let's not any of us become neurotic as well as bald. Link to post Share on other sites
BenThereDunThat Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I second everything dgiirl said.... My last two huge (HUGE) infatuations have been for men who were almost completely bald! It's the confidence thing you should be more concerned with. Both of the guys mentioned above were very self-confident. One I just wished I could be with and the other I had a mad, passionate lust for and with! Trust me, the hair (or lack of) ain't got nothin' to do with it. Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I think health insurance should cover women losing hair. That's a very unusual condition. Link to post Share on other sites
Ripples Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I can empathize. No, actually I cant. I don’t feel in the least bit sorry for you. I am a woman and am experiencing hair loss. It is devastating. And I am in my twenties. I am on every known and medically proven treatment for it – which makes me drowsy and hypotensive, not to mention smelling like rotten eggs. I have even tried treatments like Propecia and other androgen-reducing meds exclusive to men. Until you are actually willing to go to these drastic measures to curb your hair loss, I think you should just shut up and stop whining. Your “problem” is obviously not serious enough for you to seek medical attention. Until then, get the **** over it and get on with your life. You are a man. All you have to do it shave your head and you are suddenly – not only socially acceptable – but HOT HOT HOT. Must be nice to attend your own pity party. Poor thing. (((hugs))) Link to post Share on other sites
littlekitty Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 If you're like me, you're not really loosing hair, it's just migrated to your ears, back, shoulders, etc. Don't worry about it, just find yourself a lady with taste, like Dgiirl. Migrating....!! So true!! And I second the bald men are hot thing. I've dated several balding men over the years with close cut hair and it never one bothered me!! Get a hair cut, get in the gym. The exercise will help you feel better about yourself and help combat the 'fud' you're in. Then you can go about searching for that dream job and getting out there and having fun!! Be motivated.... but don't be worried about being bald. Link to post Share on other sites
littlekitty Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I can empathize. No, actually I cant. I don’t feel in the least bit sorry for you. I am a woman and am experiencing hair loss. It is devastating. And I am in my twenties. I am on every known and medically proven treatment for it – which makes me drowsy and hypotensive, not to mention smelling like rotten eggs. I have even tried treatments like Propecia and other androgen-reducing meds exclusive to men. Until you are actually willing to go to these drastic measures to curb your hair loss, I think you should just shut up and stop whining. Your “problem” is obviously not serious enough for you to seek medical attention. Until then, get the **** over it and get on with your life. You are a man. All you have to do it shave your head and you are suddenly – not only socially acceptable – but HOT HOT HOT. Must be nice to attend your own pity party. Poor thing. It must be absolutely devestating for you. *hugs* Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 It's nice of you girls to say that, but there are a lot of women in my age bracket (30's) who won't look twice at a guy loosing his hair. Fact of life. Link to post Share on other sites
Ripples Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Well, they're obviously idiots. <nods> (I'm in my 30s, btw) Give me Yul Brenner over Tom Cruise any day. Anyhoo, what about all those guys that actually shave their heads, even though they've got masses of hair? Methinks they know something. Link to post Share on other sites
dgiirl Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 It's nice of you girls to say that, but there are a lot of women in my age bracket (30's) who won't look twice at a guy loosing his hair. Fact of life. Your point being? There's plenty of men who like double d's, should I just bury myself in my bed with my tiny mini's and never date again? Dont waste your time on people who are not attracted to you, because no matter how good looking you are, there will always be someone who will not be attracted to you. Go out and find people who ARE. Fyi, I'm 32. Link to post Share on other sites
stoopid_guy Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 It's nice of you girls to say that, but there are a lot of women in my age bracket (30's) who won't look twice at a guy loosing his hair. Fact of life.Your point being? There's plenty of men who like double d's, should I just bury myself in my bed with my tiny mini's and never date again? Dont waste your time on people who are not attracted to you, because no matter how good looking you are, there will always be someone who will not be attracted to you. Go out and find people who ARE. Word. Pick almost any characteristic. Some are going to like it, some are going to hate it, and some aren't going to care. Freckles? Beards? Fair skin? Dark skin? Long nails? Don't worry about it. Insecurity will turn off a lot more ladies than baldness will. Link to post Share on other sites
Ripples Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Your point being? There's plenty of men who like double d's, should I just bury myself in my bed with my tiny mini's and never date again? Dont waste your time on people who are not attracted to you, because no matter how good looking you are, there will always be someone who will not be attracted to you. Go out and find people who ARE. Fyi, I'm 32. Oh well, yeah, that's a better way of putting it. <numptiness_overtaking_life> Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 It's nice of you girls to say that, but there are a lot of women in my age bracket (30's) who won't look twice at a guy loosing his hair. Fact of life. Ask yourself this, B4R, would you really want to be with a woman who is shallow in that way? Link to post Share on other sites
JamesM Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 One word...combover. Don't shoot me....it can be done successfully and won't look tacky. But this is a short term solution, and when you do need to shave it off, you will shock more people...and you will still be balding. Yes, I have a combover, but so far, my wife does like it. No kidding. My hairdresser styles it so that it works. My wife's hairdresser...a guy who is bald...actually never noticed it until I told him. Still not kidding. But yes, I am thinking of taking it all off one of these days...when I am too bald. My hairdresser has promised that she will tell me when I should. After sixteen years, I trust her. I said that when I have to move the part line...it is going. I totally understand your pain. My hair was one of my best features. I loved going to a new hairdresser in my twenties because they all said the same thing...."What thick hair you." (The better to please you with, my dear. And yes, I did date a hairdresser for awhile...and had free haircuts...with fringe benefits.) Then they would run their fingers through my hair for a few minutes. That ended a few years after I married...ah! the memories of youth. Fortunately, I didn't start losing hair until after I was married. But it is a reminder that age is creeping up on you. You will get over this. Personally, as a guy who does have a combover, unless you have a candid and skilled hairdresser...don't go that route. Let it all go. Don't use rogaine...tried it with no success. Don't do the transplants. This is another expensive short term solution that will still lead to the inevitable result...baldness... eventually. Women like a self confident man..not a hairy one. Toned muscles do more than hair. A friendly smile and a listening ear will bring more dates than a head of hair. A kind and compassionate face will be the main focus rather than a shock of wavy hair. Welcome the new you and avoid years of wasted life. From a guy who has not done it all the right way...and wishes he had. Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 Ask yourself this, B4R, would you really want to be with a woman who is shallow in that way? One of them, yes. Link to post Share on other sites
burning 4 revenge Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I also think I live in a particularly shallow region. You find shallow people everywhere and people who aren't so superficial as well, but some areas just are more superficial in general than others. Link to post Share on other sites
SmoochieFace Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I also think I live in a particularly shallow region. You find shallow people everywhere and people who aren't so superficial as well, but some areas just are more superficial in general than others. Well, living in South Florida may not be to your advantage if you're looking for women who aren't 'shallow'. I find the same issues with other places such as NYC, Washington (where I live ), and California, particularly Southern CA. I even refuse to 'date' women who live in my area because of their shallow tendencies. My GF lives in mid-Michigan. A change of scenery may work for you. I can't wait to get out of this hellhole here. Link to post Share on other sites
stoopid_guy Posted October 18, 2006 Share Posted October 18, 2006 I also think I live in a particularly shallow region. You find shallow people everywhere and people who aren't so superficial as well, but some areas just are more superficial in general than others.If you live in an area with shallow women, MOVE! Otherwise, spend the money you might be thinking about for hair plugs, rogaine, or whatever on some bling-bling instead. A rolex will impress a shallow woman more than hair. Link to post Share on other sites
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