love hurts

[ashinlove]

I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We are both seniors in high school. I am ready to take to next step with him and I want more than anything to build a life together. The problem is, however, that we argue alot of petty things. I know that we can work through it but he has doubts and says that living together would only make matters worse.

 

Another problem is that last summer i lied to him about going to a party and rumors were started. I have tried everything i could to make it up to him. I did not do anything wrong at the party but he thinks differently.

 

I want "us" to worked out so bad that it hurts to think he might give up.

 

Does anyone have any advice?

[Tony T]

The only thing you can do is sit tight and remain calm. The more you bring this up to him, the more he will resist. Your very best bet is to drop the subject and appear to be rather indifferent to it. That will drive him nuts.

 

You've got to show him you are very secure with yourself. When he senses you feel you can do quite fine without him, that's when he will magically come around.

 

As for your indiscretion, you've apologized and that's over with. If he can't forgive you and move on, he's got problems you don't need to deal with.

[clia]

My advice is that you are much too young to think about "building a life together." Two years of dating in high school are nothing compared to two years of dating in "real life." You argue about petty things because you are both immature and don't yet know what you want out of life. (Trust me, you don't. In about five years you will look back and realize that I'm right.) You are going to change exponentially over the next four to five years. College, if you're going, is a huge experience. You will find out things about yourself that you never expected to find.

 

Have fun with your boyfriend, but think about yourself first. Think about what you want out of YOUR life (and not just "I want to get married to him and live with him.") Think about what kind of career you want. Think about what types of experiences you want to have before you settle down. If you settle down at the age of eighteen, you will regret it when you get older. It's a big world out there and you have experienced very little of it.

 

And look at it this way. If he doesn't want to work to make your relationship work, it's not meant to be. There are a million and one guys out there to date and be with. He is not the only guy left, and if he doesn't want to put forth the effort and wants to get mad at you over little things that aren't true, then you are better off without him anyway!

 

I'm not trying to flame you, just trying to prevent you from making a mistake. (Believe me, I made it too!) There is so much more to life than getting married or living with some guy. Have a life for yourself first, then consider whether you'd like him to join in.

I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We are both seniors in high school. I am ready to take to next step with him and I want more than anything to build a life together. The problem is, however, that we argue alot of petty things. I know that we can work through it but he has doubts and says that living together would only make matters worse. Another problem is that last summer i lied to him about going to a party and rumors were started. I have tried everything i could to make it up to him. I did not do anything wrong at the party but he thinks differently. I want "us" to worked out so bad that it hurts to think he might give up. Does anyone have any advice?