Asking out someone as a friend ONLY?

[Pye]

I have asked this in my thread in the "The Other Man / Woman" section, but this is kind of unrelated to that situation and has been something I've been wondering for a while...

 

How do you ask a girl out somewhere or for her phone number as just a friend, without her thinking you're 'after her'?

 

I've met plenty of girls in the past that I'd like to be friends with or get to know better, but have no interest in being their BF or 'dating' them. But if you ask a girl for their number, or if they want to go somewhere with you (such as the cinema) then they seem to instantly think you're after them.

 

I have a friend who gets asked every week from different people at work for her number of if she'd like to go somewhere with them on the weekend etc. She says no to all of them cos she thinks they're just after something, and maybe they are, but what if one isn't? She wouldn't be able to tell cos she just says no straight out anyway, and I know she's not alone either. Lots of other ladies are like this And it's not just with people she doesn't like. She's said it to someone she's quite fond of.

 

So ladies (and maybe gents who know too), how does someone go about asking you out somewhere or for your number to get to know you better as a friend ONLY?

[Craig]

Ask her.

 

Tell her there is this friend of yours that happens to be a girl and that you want to do things with this friend but don't want it to look like you are after anything more than being friends with her (because you value the friendship/aren't ready for a relationship/whatever/etc.)

 

Then do what she said.

[MikeC]

If it was me, I would clearly state my objectives before asking her out. If you let her know, beforehand, that you value the relationship and just want to hang out, you will most likely have a better chance with her.

[monkey00]

If it was me, I would clearly state my objectives before asking her out. If you let her know, beforehand, that you value the relationship and just want to hang out, you will most likely have a better chance with her.

 

I agree I've been in situations like these and its best to be straightforward and not put pressure on the topic of hanging out, make it light and simple.

 

If you already are friends with a girl and want to hang out say so, "If you're free on XX day, lets go (verb) (noun), or "lets hangout".

And if she's busy that day, dont break a sweat over it, just tell her there's always next time.

If you wind up in an awkward moment and you dont want misunderstanding, just say "i want to make it clear this isnt a date, we're just friends."

 

However for the girls that do like you and are used to twisting words, she will assume it is a date and that you do like her. This is where the situation gets tricky because she might like you but you dont.

[lindya]

So ladies (and maybe gents who know too), how does someone go about asking you out somewhere or for your number to get to know you better as a friend ONLY?

 

Fix up a social event, invite a few people along and say "you're welcome to join us." If she expresses an interest in doing so, tell her you'll text/email the details to her - then ask for her phone number or email address.