briarmoss Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 have already posted here, and got no replies so id like to try again, without going back over the original story,my partner of 7 years left me about 6 months ago, ( im a guy) although im not unaware of the reasons i was left, it did come as a shock to me as i guess i treated her and our relationship with an amount of contempt, i should point out here, i truly with all of me love her so much, now i had some issues from wayback that i had to address which i did, for my own self worth and future not, for the sake of my x, after few months of bitterness from her toward me that i cant blame her for, even tho it hurt, she contacted me, and we started seeing a little of each other just as friends, these meets got a little more frequent and lengthier, but only as friends by her request, we started meeting at the place we used share and still own, still only as friends, then the other night she stayed over we shared same bed, she was little ok lot typsy, she asked that i didnt take advantage of her, was more shocked that she even thght i would given her state, since we got up, and i took her back to were she is staying, apart from a message saying how much she had enjoyed the night, am told she will call me mid week to make arrangements for going out again, she says she finds it amazing that im doing and changing so much,tho i still love and adore her so much and i miss talking with her, and contact as we werent just lovers we where best mates, (or so i thght) i am doing the no contact thing, and appreciating her right to freedom not just freedom in general but freedom from the relationship, from us, tho it does hurt like hell, not just asking am i doing right thing, but has anyone any suggestions as to what may going on in her georgous head, and any tips on my actions with her now and in future...... xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Link to post Share on other sites
magichands Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 she says she finds it amazing that im doing and changing so much Sounds like you are on the right track. Why not learn to write in paragraphs whilst you are into self-improvement? It might even help with organising your thoughts (no promises there, though). Link to post Share on other sites
Island Girl Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 So far so good! I don't know how many people out there would love to be on a blossoming path with their ex where after steady contact she is in bed with you (sex or no sex). If you were the best of friends then focus on that. Remind her (by your actions) why she loved you so much. Show her when you are together that you have dealt with your issues. She is already noticing quite a bit considering the remarks about you growing and changing so much. Just keep doing what you are doing in any event. It seems to be working. Link to post Share on other sites
dr strangelove Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 Im sorry but, whats the f---ing deal here Briar moss? I replied to one of your posts. Your last one was replied to.. In all I think you have posted the same thread 4 times. Heres any idea, why not go see a counsellor. Why not ask her why she left instead of guessing.. ooooo (light bulb thought bubble) Link to post Share on other sites
Mythical Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 I think right now you are doing the right thing. It is great that you are changing for yourself and not for others. Since you guys hade a great time and she hade said that...it looks good to me. Question? Why did she say "don't take advantage of me"?? With you holding back on contacting her to give her space I think is also great because you both need space, and if she is and I know you want to get back together it will give you too a reality check of what you both really want. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted October 22, 2006 Share Posted October 22, 2006 THAT IS JUST MEAN ignore himIm sorry but, whats the f---ing deal here Briar moss? I replied to one of your posts. Your last one was replied to.. In all I think you have posted the same thread 4 times. Heres any idea, why not go see a counselor. Why not ask her why she left instead of guessing.. ooooo (light bulb thought bubble) Link to post Share on other sites
D-Lish Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 Yer on the right track here BM. If you really want her back- going by her "let's take things slow" plan is in your best interest. If there were specific things she asked of you that needed dealing with in regards to the relationship- and you're doing your best to work on those things... they will get noticed. It seems like she is already noticing. Just keep letting her make the moves and let her be the one to think she is making the decision to take things to the next level. Having her come to that realization on her own is integral to having a sustaining relationship in the future. If she comes back because you make her feel guilty- that can only lead to resentment on her part down the road. You're playing everything correct, handling it with patience. I hope you find success! D-Lish Link to post Share on other sites
riobikini Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 re: Briarmoss: "...not just asking am i doing right thing, but has anyone any suggestions as to what may going on in her gorgeous head, and any tips on my actions with her now...." Briarmoss, if something seems to be *working* and things seem to be advancing and improving between you -even minimally- don't change it. Seven years is a long time -and I'm reasonably certain that, as long as you've been together, she feels she knows what she has to look for to conclude that you are making positive progress with whatever changes that needed to occur, in order for there to be hope that your relationship is not totally over. And -apparently- she is seeing that improvement- and is willing to keep seeing you to gain assurance that it's genuine -and going to last. The last thing you want to do is switch to some alternate behavior. She's attempting to rebuild trust in you. Let her. -Rio Link to post Share on other sites
Author briarmoss Posted October 23, 2006 Author Share Posted October 23, 2006 Hi everyone inc doctor strangelove, thanks all for reading my story and thanks for all the comments, especially as the majority are positive ones, the reason I guess that she asked me to not take advantage was that she was paralettic, and some guys do unfortunately see that as a green light, however did suprise me as she knows 100 per cent im not like that, that said again she is aware of how much I miss her and us. Link to post Share on other sites
dr strangelove Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 Mean? moi (pisses on guests foot mmm thats better ahh) No im just misunderstood and I quite frankly dont give a s--- I think you are making progress, but you dont see that. Thats part of the problem. Paraletic? huh? your posts are confusing. from what I can tell that means she was really drunk or missing a leg..? Look what is it that you wish to see happen? hmm you want to understand her? You have to ask her not us, or as I suggested a "counsellor" See they help you understand little nuances of behaviour Like for instance sometimes when someone calls you horrible names its not because they hate you its because they are hurt. What ever what do I know.. Link to post Share on other sites
Author briarmoss Posted October 23, 2006 Author Share Posted October 23, 2006 Hi doc really like to talk more with you, without appearing to be over the top, whilst I appreciate your message that you dont necessarily know everything you do appear to have a better grasp on things than i am able to do at the moment, feel like im 18 again rather than dble that and a little more, thanks for your response, and really hope we can chat more in depth. Link to post Share on other sites
dr strangelove Posted October 24, 2006 Share Posted October 24, 2006 uh ok..? so have you been in contact with her since the original historic post? Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts