noforgiveness Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 reneet and yousaveme you are very cruel and bitter women. To actually brag that the stbx wives of your mm thought they had no contact too is disgusting. you save me your man is far from soon to be x. he's still a husband and father. renee you keep saying you weren't to blame. doesn't sound true now. You both disgust me with your attitudes. Renee i would not be too proud that you got your man when he's been living with you for FIVE years and is still married. Sounds like a man who still doesn't know what he wants. I am not taking a business trip. i am going for pleasure with girlfriends and leaving him with the kids for a week. Part of my screw you i need a break and time to think. It will be the first time i have ever vacationed without him. He knows his boundaries and knows there is to be no contact with her. I guess i will see what happens when i get back. I will not chain him to me and will enjoy a week of sun n fun with friends. if he wants contact with her going away for a week won't matter. He can do it all day long when he is at the office. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Just make it clear to him that he is risking ALOT if he chooses to contact her. Go have fun on your holiday and have some trust/faith in him that he won't do something stupid. Hopefully he'll be too busy with the kids to even have time to contact her. Please go to marriage counselling, he is willing to and that's a good thing. Link to post Share on other sites
noforgiveness Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Just like our SO's stbxw's thought it was over? Hmmmm. just thought i'd quote this since you kept saying his marriage beak up had nothing to do with you. Looks like your proud of your involvement. Link to post Share on other sites
yousaveme Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 reneet and yousaveme you are very cruel and bitter women. To actually brag that the stbx wives of your mm thought they had no contact too is disgusting. you save me your man is far from soon to be x. he's still a husband and father. renee you keep saying you weren't to blame. doesn't sound true now. You both disgust me with your attitudes. Renee i would not be too proud that you got your man when he's been living with you for FIVE years and is still married. Sounds like a man who still doesn't know what he wants. I am not taking a business trip. i am going for pleasure with girlfriends and leaving him with the kids for a week. Part of my screw you i need a break and time to think. It will be the first time i have ever vacationed without him. He knows his boundaries and knows there is to be no contact with her. I guess i will see what happens when i get back. I will not chain him to me and will enjoy a week of sun n fun with friends. if he wants contact with her going away for a week won't matter. He can do it all day long when he is at the office. I agreed with the last poster that you should go into counseling now. Everyone agrees with that..And that bothers you...I never said anything about my MM in this. Where are you getting that? But here we go again , take it the way you want. Link to post Share on other sites
reneet Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 reneet and yousaveme you are very cruel and bitter women. To actually brag that the stbx wives of your mm thought they had no contact too is disgusting. you save me your man is far from soon to be x. he's still a husband and father. renee you keep saying you weren't to blame. doesn't sound true now. You both disgust me with your attitudes. Renee i would not be too proud that you got your man when he's been living with you for FIVE years and is still married. Sounds like a man who still doesn't know what he wants. I am not taking a business trip. i am going for pleasure with girlfriends and leaving him with the kids for a week. Part of my screw you i need a break and time to think. It will be the first time i have ever vacationed without him. He knows his boundaries and knows there is to be no contact with her. I guess i will see what happens when i get back. I will not chain him to me and will enjoy a week of sun n fun with friends. if he wants contact with her going away for a week won't matter. He can do it all day long when he is at the office. Have a great time on that vacation of yours!! Link to post Share on other sites
Buttaflyy Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 reneet and yousaveme you are very cruel and bitter women. To actually brag that the stbx wives of your mm thought they had no contact too is disgusting. you save me your man is far from soon to be x. he's still a husband and father. renee you keep saying you weren't to blame. doesn't sound true now. You both disgust me with your attitudes. Renee i would not be too proud that you got your man when he's been living with you for FIVE years and is still married. Sounds like a man who still doesn't know what he wants. I am not taking a business trip. i am going for pleasure with girlfriends and leaving him with the kids for a week. Part of my screw you i need a break and time to think. It will be the first time i have ever vacationed without him. He knows his boundaries and knows there is to be no contact with her. I guess i will see what happens when i get back. I will not chain him to me and will enjoy a week of sun n fun with friends. if he wants contact with her going away for a week won't matter. He can do it all day long when he is at the office. I love your attitude! And you know, I thought about you going away before but didn't bring it up because for one, you shouldn't be worrying yourself with what he may do, and because ultimately, this may be good for you to start building your trust back. What he does, is totally up to him as it's always been. As you said, you can't chain him to you. I love your outlook on everything. Fun in the sun w/friends sounds like just what you need. I love that you look after YOU! Link to post Share on other sites
reneet Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I agreed with the last poster that you should go into counseling now. Everyone agrees with that..And that bothers you...I never said anything about my MM in this. Where are you getting that? But here we go again , take it the way you want. Hmmm. Looks like they take the bait really quick here. Link to post Share on other sites
noforgiveness Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Just make it clear to him that he is risking ALOT if he chooses to contact her. Go have fun on your holiday and have some trust/faith in him that he won't do something stupid. Hopefully he'll be too busy with the kids to even have time to contact her. Please go to marriage counselling, he is willing to and that's a good thing. thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
yousaveme Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 noforgiveness, I re-read your posts and it seems like he is willing to go to a counselor. You said that you are waiting. Now might be a good time. You are getting ready to go away and it doesn't sound like any boundaries have been set. You either need-to set those boundaries yourself or, for a better result, get to therapy ASAP. You wouldn't leave an alcoholic alone in a room with a bottle of vodka would you? You need to deal with this before you go away. Did you not read this post...whats wrong with it? I agreed with it..Maybe you dont... Is that why is says your waiting for counseling. Whats the wait? Whats more important your marriage or fun in the sun? Link to post Share on other sites
Buttaflyy Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Hmmm. Looks like they take the bait really quick here. Your very childish. BTW, it looked like yousaveme was disassociating herself from you in that statement you quoted. You didn't see that though didya? Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I'm glad you have set boundaries. Sounds like you have been very clear. That's all you can do for now. But when you can, please take advantage of the fact that he is will to go to counseling. I was hesitant that it would work for me, but it did and I'm glad I went. I have learned to take responsibility for my own happiness and that has made is easier to work with my H on our marriage. Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 she can't see this because she is one of those people that puts anyone who hurts her feelings on IGNORE, my petal. Didn't you notice that? I think it's a good rule to say, don't **** where you eat. If you're friends with someone STFU and keep your pants zipped. Period end of sentence. To defend any stance other than that -- to claim ivory tower LOVE CONQUERS ALL -- is just so lame it makes me vomit in my mouth. Respect yourself. And how can you respect yourself when you betray the trust of those who love and support you? Namely your friends? That is a betrayal most women never recover from. And it's very selfish to think otherwise. I had begun to suspect that , oh well . Great point you make though. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 and I do hope you have fun on your vacation. I know what the pain of being a BW feels like, and it wil be good for you to get away from it for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
yousaveme Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Why are you waiting for marriage counseling? Really. You want it to workout, then why wait. You said he is willing to go..Are you going as soon as you get back? Link to post Share on other sites
reneet Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Why are you waiting for marriage counseling? Really. You want it to workout, then why wait. You said he is willing to go..Are you going as soon as you get back? Are you trying to get info from the wife to give to the best friend who will in turn tell the H what the W's plan is? Just Wondering Link to post Share on other sites
yousaveme Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Are you trying to get info from the wife to give to the best friend who will in turn tell the H what the W's plan is? Just Wondering i really want to know. Its been asked before but was not given an answer. Just thought since they are both willing to go what they hold up is. Link to post Share on other sites
blind_otter Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I had begun to suspect that , oh well . Great point you make though. Sometimes I just post to subscribe the the parade of delusion. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Hmmm. Looks like they take the bait really quick here. Bait? You just love to upset people don't you. Misery loves company, is that why you are here? Because you're miserable? I think you are in more need of therapy than anyone. We were getting back to helping noforgivness and you just had to jump in with bait. Link to post Share on other sites
reneet Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Bait? You just love to upset people don't you. Misery loves company, is that why you are here? Because you're miserable? I think you are in more need of therapy than anyone. We were getting back to helping noforgivness and you just had to jump in with bait. Was I even speaking to you? I was speaking to yousaveme. MYOB why don't ya & Just continue your helping ways. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Was I even speaking to you? I was speaking to yousaveme. MYOB why don't ya & Just continue your helping ways. Sorry to eaves drop on your private conversation with yousaveme. Remember, I'm new. What does MYOB mean? Link to post Share on other sites
tinktronik Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 Sorry to eaves drop on your private conversation with yousaveme. Remember, I'm new. What does MYOB mean? It means mind your own bussiness.Oh and private convos are done in PM. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 It means mind your own bussiness.Oh and private convos are done in PM. How do I send a PM? I would like to send one to noforgivness. Link to post Share on other sites
yousaveme Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 How do I send a PM? I would like to send one to noforgivness. I believe you either have to be on here long enough to get it or subscribe to it. I just got it...After being on here since Aug.. Link to post Share on other sites
herenow Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 I believe you either have to be on here long enough to get it or subscribe to it. I just got it...After being on here since Aug.. OK, thank you. Link to post Share on other sites
yousaveme Posted November 1, 2006 Share Posted November 1, 2006 OK, thank you. your welcome.. Link to post Share on other sites
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