online fantasy vs. reality [i don't know what to believe anymore]

[Guest]

but i do know i will never engage in any online fantasy play ever again in my life and that there are certain people i will never trust again.

 

here is my online fantasy story - notice how it mirrors my real life situation

 

a few years back, for some strange reason, i decided to go online to simply find people that were open and creative and enjoyed discussions about sex and sexulaity. i am a curious soul. i love discovering more about the world around me, myself and my partner. i did this first with the woman that i loved with all my heart. i enjoyed hearing about her dreams, desires and fantasies because i only wanted to please her every way i could. we talked in general about sex and i asked her if she had ever watched any porn videos and she said she had and that there was one she really liked.

 

i had little to know experice with this, didn't know any porn star names, sites, etc., but she seemed to know many [didn't see the red flag on that one], she downloaded a video of a bunch of women using something called a sybian and she said she liked it because it 'seemed' real. i liked the fact that she liked it and was sharing this with me. that was my motivation. so, she showed me the program to download vids and then i tried to find some that i liked to show her.

 

we tried that for a few weeks and then she said it was something she simply wasn't interested in and if i had a desire to express like that that i should find another avenue to do so. so i did. i stumbled across a site called 321 sex chat and for the most part it consisted of a 'lobby' where 'icons an monikers' [people playing role games by removing their own identies], and private rooms you could set up, and u could send private pms to others.

 

there was this person with the name HOTStm [ireland] and she was so funny, always flirting in the lobby driving would be chasers crazy. one nite i sent her a pm and just talked with her about things in general. i asked her if she liked to talk about sex, trying to use words to transpose emotions and she said yes and that she loved to do so. so, we did that for about 7 hours, and it was weird because it was like before i would say something, she would say it - like we knew each other naturally [it was like talking with my gf], now she told me that this excited her [and i enjoyed making her happy].

 

so, we would met every once and a while, but it was hard to talk with her because there was another guy [bad boi, vanity hound] in the lobby that HOTS had already been 'seeing' which i did not know. HOTS would often leave during our conversations to go and talk with him. I was the deep thinker, he was the fun stud, and she liked both worlds. at this time i was depressed, addicted, my love never talked or slept with me, grew distant in bed - and basically disappeared. my communications with HOTS was pure fantasy for me and as I stated getting better, I stopped talking with her. Around that time, my gf decided to leave and end our relationship.

 

She disappeared. One year later I discovered that the love of my love had been having an affair with who was at the time an extremely good friend of mine, and it was at the EXACT same time that i was doing my online game. In fact, the three people online mirrored the three people in real life - down to a tea. Later I discovered that my gf's lesbian friend had played a role in setting all this up and had rigged up my computer so she could steal video, pix, and text - I horrible criminal act which she will be held accountable for. So in the end, my 4 year relationship was basically a video game manipulated by some women for her own enjoyment.

Nice eh

[LakesideDream]

Where's the suprise here? When you write things online you don't want public, you risk this kind of exposure.

[HighDesertSoftness]

Online, for the most part, is intangible. There is some fun to be had online, if one doesn't lose perspective. Some people find it hard to draw the line when it comes to online erotic play.