Jenn Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 My boyfriend is friends with his ex. I am fine with that. She has a boyfriend too. But last night my boyfriend asked me if it was okay that he goes to Thunder with her (thunder is fireworks). He could tell this bothered me. Because I barely see him for one, and he then he told me that he worries that she is going to kiss him while they are out. I told him that if she does I will hurt her. But in reality I can't because I am 19 and she is 16. Now he and this girl have dated so many times. He told me that basically when he breaks up with someone he goes back to her. I fear that he is going to realize that he wants her and not me. He is the only thing that is going good in my life. I don't want to lose this. What should I do? Should I tell him no, not to go with her? I mean that would seem like I am a bitch. Or should I let them go? A few of my friends told me that they would go with me if I wanted to see fireworks. I don't know what to do. This thing is supposed to take place Saturday 4/20/02. So I need to know what to do as soon as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 I think it is highly disrespectful for your boyfriend to go with his ex to "fireworks" after he has told you he always goes back to his exes. On the other hand, you can't control him or steal his "Thunder". If he wants to take her to Thunder and make whoopie, there's not much you can do about it except leave him. Why don't you tell him to take both of you? Yeah, why can't he take you to this event? If his ex is a buddy and you are his girlfriend, then why can't you both go with him? And what is her boyfriend doing tomorrow night? I think he ought to be invited along too. Yeppers, the four of you should all go together and enjoy the fireworks. Then, I don't think you ought to see those people again. But it does very much sound like your guy is fixing to go back to this girl, especially after he warned you he always goes back. Maybe you ought not to go to Thunder and instead spend some time looking for a guy who has more respect for a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
BeenThere Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 Wait a minute...were you invited to go along, too? Or is it just the two of them? My boyfriend is friends with his ex. I am fine with that. She has a boyfriend too. But last night my boyfriend asked me if it was okay that he goes to Thunder with her (thunder is fireworks). He could tell this bothered me. Because I barely see him for one, and he then he told me that he worries that she is going to kiss him while they are out. I told him that if she does I will hurt her. But in reality I can't because I am 19 and she is 16. Now he and this girl have dated so many times. He told me that basically when he breaks up with someone he goes back to her. I fear that he is going to realize that he wants her and not me. He is the only thing that is going good in my life. I don't want to lose this. What should I do? Should I tell him no, not to go with her? I mean that would seem like I am a bitch. Or should I let them go? A few of my friends told me that they would go with me if I wanted to see fireworks. I don't know what to do. This thing is supposed to take place Saturday 4/20/02. So I need to know what to do as soon as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
Jenn Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 It was just him and his ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 If he doesn't allow you to go along as well, tell him not to bother coming back! Link to post Share on other sites
BeenThere Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 If this guy is the "only thing good in your life" you better turn yourself around! I might be way off on this since I don't know your situation, but the hole thing sounds real shadey to me. You're not a b*tch. As a matter of fact I admire that you've done so well keeping your wits about you thus far. I won't dare suggest that you dump him (although I would!) but I would certainly advise you to remain on guard. It is rude for either of them to plan a DATE without you---OR this other girl's "significant other." I can't even believe they had the nerve! It's situations like this (and there are many) which make most of us uncomfortable with our partner's "platonic friendships with ex's." Is it any wonder? Perhaps I'm just insecure and jealous too, but call it what you may this is just the kind of behavior I would absolutely refuse to tolerate. If you want to see a real b*tch Jenn, give ME 10 minutes in the room with the two of them!! God didn't make anything uglier than a p*ssed off dego! Hang in there, girl. I'm taking your side on this one! It was just him and his ex. Link to post Share on other sites
Angel Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 I would gently say, "if you go with her you will never go out with me again"---say it sweetly and with a smile on your face! It is his decision to go--but yours to stay. Don't let him do this to you. BESIDES----you both are too young to commit to a steady relationship; it is obvious he is not ready for one. Move on sweetie. If he doesn't allow you to go along as well, tell him not to bother coming back! Link to post Share on other sites
Bill Posted April 19, 2002 Share Posted April 19, 2002 If you let him go, it will be a big mistake. Remember it's his loss. My boyfriend is friends with his ex. I am fine with that. She has a boyfriend too. But last night my boyfriend asked me if it was okay that he goes to Thunder with her (thunder is fireworks). He could tell this bothered me. Because I barely see him for one, and he then he told me that he worries that she is going to kiss him while they are out. I told him that if she does I will hurt her. But in reality I can't because I am 19 and she is 16. Now he and this girl have dated so many times. He told me that basically when he breaks up with someone he goes back to her. I fear that he is going to realize that he wants her and not me. He is the only thing that is going good in my life. I don't want to lose this. What should I do? Should I tell him no, not to go with her? I mean that would seem like I am a bitch. Or should I let them go? A few of my friends told me that they would go with me if I wanted to see fireworks. I don't know what to do. This thing is supposed to take place Saturday 4/20/02. So I need to know what to do as soon as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
neckbone Posted April 20, 2002 Share Posted April 20, 2002 Come to me baby......I'll show you how to be treated! I think it is highly disrespectful for your boyfriend to go with his ex to "fireworks" after he has told you he always goes back to his exes. On the other hand, you can't control him or steal his "Thunder". If he wants to take her to Thunder and make whoopie, there's not much you can do about it except leave him. Why don't you tell him to take both of you? Yeah, why can't he take you to this event? If his ex is a buddy and you are his girlfriend, then why can't you both go with him? And what is her boyfriend doing tomorrow night? I think he ought to be invited along too. Yeppers, the four of you should all go together and enjoy the fireworks. Then, I don't think you ought to see those people again. But it does very much sound like your guy is fixing to go back to this girl, especially after he warned you he always goes back. Maybe you ought not to go to Thunder and instead spend some time looking for a guy who has more respect for a relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Jenn Posted April 20, 2002 Share Posted April 20, 2002 Oh my kid.....if you want to talk to me then e-mail me at <e-mail address removed> Link to post Share on other sites
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