Questions for the happy people

[phyrespryte]

Why are you happy? Were you always happy? Any wisdom you feel like sharing to others wanting the same thing?

[IpAncA]

I try live my life without regrets, in the present, and let go of the past. Plus I know I'm loved and cared for and I'm happy with how my life is right now. Plus I'm thankful for everything that I have and everyone that is in my life.

 

Have I always be happy? No

[Pyro]

Why are you happy? Were you always happy? Any wisdom you feel like sharing to others wanting the same thing?

 

I am happy because I like who I am. I understand that I am not perfect, I will make mistakes, but I will learn from them. I am proud of what I have accomplished and I look forward to the future.

 

I wasn't always happy. I use to always curse myself when something didn't go my way. I never thought I would get any better then what I was at the time. I realized that you are dealt certain cards through life and its up to you how to play them. Some look at the glass half empty but I look at it half full.

 

Overall, I believe that life is too short to hate myself. The past is the past. Don't hold on to the past, just learn from it.

[Guest]

I have been happy for pretty much as long as I can remember. I've had a few bad spots, but knew they would end and they did.

 

Do a search on John Helliwell and Richard Davidson and read the story by Karen Gram (or probably any of the articles on them). I saw them speak recently. What they teach is what I discovered on my own and through reading so rather than typing out my philosophy, I'll let you read what others have written

[alphamale]

I have a great family.

[Tony T]

You can't help but be happy no matter what's happening on your life. Just consider that on any given day you could have been one of the handful of people who was blown to bits in Iraq...but you're all together and the only thing you may have to worry about is a few bucks, an exam, a tax audit or a broken heart. People who are blown to bits have NO hope at all. You do!

[Fun2BMe]

I have a great family.

 

How do you know that it is your great family that makes you happy?

 

I am happy because I like who I am.

 

Overall, I believe that life is too short to hate myself.

So for you as long as you like yourself and don't hate yourself, you find happiness? Sometimes I admire myself and think how wonderful I am but it has no bearing on my level of happiness.

 

 

I have been happy for pretty much as long as I can remember.

I think people are naturally predisposed to either be happy or sad or somewhere in between. We can make ourselves a little bit happier or sadder than what we are born feeling but it can be temporary unless someone knows what makes them feel happy. Then they do those things and write a book about it but I doubt it is long lasting.

 

I've had a few bad spots, but knew they would end and they did.

I think there is a lot to this sense of optimism and being positive in all situations. It seems to be a shared trait in happy people.

 

I try live my life without regrets, in the present, and let go of the past. Plus I know I'm loved and cared for and I'm happy with how my life is right now. Plus I'm thankful for everything that I have and everyone that is in my life.

 

Have I always be happy? No

So is the reason why you have always not been happy because you did not have the things you list such as your life was not without regrets, not being thankful and so on?

 

Personally I think happiness is a side-effect, just like when you hurt yourself you feel pain, some things in life naturally make someone happy but the same thing might not make another happy, or someone might need a greater dose of that thing. So to try to be happy is like to try to predict the weather. We really don't have much control over it.

[IpAncA]

So is the reason why you have always not been happy because you did not have the things you list such as your life was not without regrets, not being thankful and so on?

 

What is this. Rip on me night.

 

The reason that I wasn't happy was I hated myself and since I hated myself, that filtered into everything else that I did. Some of it though was that I felt alone even though there was people around me. But that's in the past and doesn't have any effect on me now.

 

I try to not fill my life with negative things because what does that do? Nothing. By living in the now and letting go of the past, it helps me to stay positive and live my life to the fullest. I may not be able to change the past but I can learn from it and gain strength from it. When you haven't felt like you've been loved and cared for and then when someone finally does give a dam about you, it makes you feel good in a way that I can't describe.

[Fun2BMe]

You can't help but be happy no matter what's happening on your life. Just consider that on any given day you could have been one of the handful of people who was blown to bits in Iraq...but you're all together and the only thing you may have to worry about is a few bucks, an exam, a tax audit or a broken heart. People who are blown to bits have NO hope at all. You do!

 

That's like a billionaire who is a workaholic because he still doesn't think he has enough money whereas to someone living paycheck to paycheck even a small fraction of his fortune would be enough for him. So to compare the misery of someone living in a country at war with another's situation doesn't mean the other should therefore be happy according to a third person's opinion. That 'happy' person's SO could've just been diagnosed with cancer, he could have lost his job and be stressed over an exam and tax audit all of which might lead him to suicide because of the level of his unhappiness. He could be equally or even unhappier than the person in Iraq.

[Fun2BMe]

The reason that I wasn't happy was I hated myself and since I hated myself, that filtered into everything else that I did.

Interesting that The Riddler says the same, that he wasn't happy when he didn't like himself.

 

When you haven't felt like you've been loved and cared for and then when someone finally does give a dam about you, it makes you feel good in a way that I can't describe.

 

It sounds like you base your happiness on someone's giving a dam about you. It sounds like the reason WHY you like yourself is because somebody else does. What if that person were to leave you? I don't think you should allow your happiness to rely on someone else and how they make you feel but to find it in yourself. However, I would not say to stop being happy! Just be careful.

[IpAncA]

Interesting that The Riddler says the same, that he wasn't happy when he didn't like himself.

 

 

It sounds like you base your happiness on someone's giving a dam about you. It sounds like the reason WHY you like yourself is because somebody else does. What if that person were to leave you? I don't think you should allow your happiness to rely on someone else and how they make you feel but to find it in yourself. However, I would not say to stop being happy! Just be careful.

 

Why is that interesting? If you don't like yourself your probably not going to be happy.

 

I never said that I base my happiness on someone else nor do I rely on it. I said that some of it was the reason why I wasn't happy but that wasn't the whole reason. When I'm with my husband, yes i'm happy. He made me come alive and I liked that feeling and still do. Yes if he left me I would be unhappy but that wouldn't lead me to hate myself or fall back into old habits. There was a lot of personal issues that I let myself kept inside that kept me unhappy thus leading me to hate myself.

[burning 4 revenge]

You can't help but be happy no matter what's happening on your life.

:lmao: :lmao:

[pricillia]

Interesting that The Riddler says the same, that he wasn't happy when he didn't like himself.

 

 

 

It sounds like you base your happiness on someone's giving a dam about you. It sounds like the reason WHY you like yourself is because somebody else does. What if that person were to leave you? I don't think you should allow your happiness to rely on someone else and how they make you feel but to find it in yourself. However, I would not say to stop being happy! Just be careful.

 

I think that they are trying to say that if you are positive then you will attract positive things in your life.

[alphamale]

How do you know that it is your great family that makes you happy?

because:

1. my family has stuck with me thru thick and thin
   
2. i was blessed with the best parents anyone could have
   
3. both my parents were very intelligent and hardworking
   
4. my two younger brothers have helped me out a lot
   
5. we come together when there is a crisis
   
6. without them I would not be where I am today
   
7. i can always count on my dad & brothers (mom died in '97)
   
8. i don't know what i'd to without them

[pricillia]

because:

1. my family has stuck with me thru thick and thin
   
2. i was blessed with the best parents anyone could have
   
3. both my parents were very intelligent and hardworking
   
4. my two younger brothers have helped me out a lot
   
5. we come together when there is a crisis
   
6. without them I would not be where I am today
   
7. i can always count on my dad & brothers (mom died in '97)
   
8. i don't know what i'd to without them

 

 

that was very nice!

[Fun2BMe]

because:

1. my family has stuck with me thru thick and thin
   
2. i was blessed with the best parents anyone could have
   
3. both my parents were very intelligent and hardworking
   
4. my two younger brothers have helped me out a lot
   
5. we come together when there is a crisis
   
6. without them I would not be where I am today
   
7. i can always count on my dad & brothers (mom died in '97)
   
8. i don't know what i'd to without them

 

Newsflash - you could've been born with happy genes. I have great members in my family yet I am constantly depressed. I can call on them and they'd be there for me, they're hardworking and all of the above you list (minus my mother is cold and distant and my father died) yet I am always upset over something. Upset like really unhappy either with a relationship or something else so that is why I asked if you know for certain if it is your great family that is the cause of your happiness.

[IpAncA]

Newsflash - you could've been born with happy genes. I have great members in my family yet I am constantly depressed. I can call on them and they'd be there for me, they're hardworking and all of the above you list (minus my mother is cold and distant and my father died) yet I am always upset over something. Upset like really unhappy either with a relationship or something else so that is why I asked if you know for certain if it is your great family that is the cause of your happiness.

I've never heard of happy genes before. Everyone else on here is happy but it sounds like your not. So what makes you happy?

[pricillia]

Newsflash - you could've been born with happy genes. I have great members in my family yet I am constantly depressed. I can call on them and they'd be there for me, they're hardworking and all of the above you list (minus my mother is cold and distant and my father died) yet I am always upset over something. Upset like really unhappy either with a relationship or something else so that is why I asked if you know for certain if it is your great family that is the cause of your happiness.

 

yes but for alpha it is personal, he appreciates his family and values what they have to offer, they are there for him and he is there for them and that makes him happy.

Fun2BMe you have to find what makes you happy appreciate the help that you get, start doing things for others to make them happy try not to always think of how depressing things may be for you...

[Fun2BMe]

I've never heard of happy genes before. Everyone else on here is happy but it sounds like your not. So what makes you happy?

 

By happy genes, I mean that two people can be in the same circumstances yet one can be unhappy the other very happy because he is predisposed or born that way to naturally feel happy is what I mean. It can all do with brain chemistry which is why medication can alter your mood. I don't think you can point your finger at something and say see, that is what makes me happy which is why I wouldn't be able to tell you what if anything really makes me happy. Sometimes I feel happy but it's almost at a whim for no reason and other times unhappy. The sad thing is I can be easily made to feel unhappy like if a bf hurts my feelings yet he can do a million other things to try to make me happy yet it might not work.

[pricillia]

By happy genes, I mean that two people can be in the same circumstances yet one can be unhappy the other very happy because he is predisposed or born that way to naturally feel happy is what I mean. It can all do with brain chemistry which is why medication can alter your mood. I don't think you can point your finger at something and say see, that is what makes me happy which is why I wouldn't be able to tell you what if anything really makes me happy. Sometimes I feel happy but it's almost at a whim for no reason and other times unhappy. The sad thing is I can be easily made to feel unhappy like if a bf hurts my feelings yet he can do a million other things to try to make me happy yet it might not work.

 

 

oh my.............

[IpAncA]

By happy genes, I mean that two people can be in the same circumstances yet one can be unhappy the other very happy because he is predisposed or born that way to naturally feel happy is what I mean. It can all do with brain chemistry which is why medication can alter your mood. I don't think you can point your finger at something and say see, that is what makes me happy which is why I wouldn't be able to tell you what if anything really makes me happy. Sometimes I feel happy but it's almost at a whim for no reason and other times unhappy. The sad thing is I can be easily made to feel unhappy like if a bf hurts my feelings yet he can do a million other things to try to make me happy yet it might not work.

 

Well I don't follow the happy gene thing but you should be able to say at least one thing that makes you happy. Of the things that I have mentioned, those REALLY do make me happy.

[pricillia]

when I know that I have helped someone in need, that makes me happy.

Also knowing that I am loved, that makes me happy.

[Fun2BMe]

Well I don't follow the happy gene thing but you should be able to say at least one thing that makes you happy. Of the things that I have mentioned, those REALLY do make me happy.

 

Well, I don't know if I'm the only person like this but I will fluctuate through a short span of 'happy' period and a longer sad period. During the happy period I can easily move into the sad stage if something upsets me. If I am in the sad period, it's a done deal. It is almost impossible to get me out of it until that stage phases out. I recently shifted into my sad phase I think thanks to my SO. Maybe that's why I sound so negative which I don't mean to be.

 

I canceled a lot of 'fun' plans because I knew they wouldn't help to make me feel better. Tomorrow I will be attending the "Babel" premiere and I'm not even excited about it and wouldn't be surprised if I ended up not going. What I mean is, I can't relate to people who point to something and say see, that's what makes me happy. If I was in my 'happy' stage, I'd probably point to anything and say yes, that too makes me happy and this and that but if they really did, then I'd never be unhappy because all I'd have to do would be to go to those things I point out or look forward to various events or trips that I claim make me happy.

 

Which takes me back to the belief that you have to find happiness within yourself and that way circumstances around you can change but you can still be happy. That might not be true though if others can point to things outside themselves and claim that those things are responsible for their happiness whether they be other people, a prized possession and so forth. Helping those in need can make me feel good but it doesn't do enough to make me feel happy unfortunately. I give a lot to charity but I'm not bouncing off the walls screaming with laughter.

[BenThereDunThat]

By happy genes, I mean that two people can be in the same circumstances yet one can be unhappy the other very happy because he is predisposed or born that way to naturally feel happy is what I mean. It can all do with brain chemistry which is why medication can alter your mood. I don't think you can point your finger at something and say see, that is what makes me happy which is why I wouldn't be able to tell you what if anything really makes me happy. Sometimes I feel happy but it's almost at a whim for no reason and other times unhappy. The sad thing is I can be easily made to feel unhappy like if a bf hurts my feelings yet he can do a million other things to try to make me happy yet it might not work.

 

You know, me and my dad were talking about this very thing just yesterday. I've been going through a rough time lately and he's been worried about me. He said you know, we all (meaning my family) have this thing in us that when we get down we can't seem to just focus on all the good things in our lives - and there are a lot of good things! We're not in Iraq, we're healthy, etc.

 

Most times, I am happy but when I get down there is no in between. I get really, really down and it's a battle to get that negativity out of my head.

 

I know I inherited that trait.

[Tony T]

That's like a billionaire who is a workaholic because he still doesn't think he has enough money whereas to someone living paycheck to paycheck even a small fraction of his fortune would be enough for him. So to compare the misery of someone living in a country at war with another's situation doesn't mean the other should therefore be happy according to a third person's opinion. That 'happy' person's SO could've just been diagnosed with cancer, he could have lost his job and be stressed over an exam and tax audit all of which might lead him to suicide because of the level of his unhappiness. He could be equally or even unhappier than the person in Iraq.

 

If making the comparison keeps me happy I'm sticking with it, Babes!!! If my SO is diagnosed with cancer, at least she didn't get blown to bits. There's still hope that she can recover.

 

Happiness really shouldn't be dependent on events. Life presents us with some sucking circumstances. The way we look at things creates our happiness...because we really have no control over a lot of things that could create sadness if we let it.