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Who is the rebound?


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My ex bf went out with a girl who broke his heart a few years ago. He admitted that he never felt for anyone before like he did for her. She taught him how to really be intimate with someone and he loved her. She went back to her husband and he was heartbroken. Then he started dating this other girl, Lisa. They dated for about a year and a half, off and on when they finally broke up last November. So, him and I started dating in May. We dated until Oct, when Lisa came to him and asked him to come back to her.

 

So, my question is, wouldn't she be the rebound from the one he really loved? And if SHE is the rebound, then why did he go back to her? He said to many people, including myself that he never felt that way for Lisa like he did the other girl. He told me that he felt for me like he did the other girl. So, who is the rebound? Will he figure out that he wants me? Will he make it with her when they had already broken up many times. Him and I never had fights or problems, only shared an intense intimacy. I want him back. What can I do?

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Well it's pretty clear here that he just still loves her more than any other girl, and from what your saying, he even told you that he does, so theres really not a rebound here.

 

A rebound is usually a secondary option for who you really want, but since it seems that him and this girl has history and that he also says he loves this girl more than you, it doesnt seem like a secondary option because he does really want her.

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Wiseone, there are 3 women here, Lisa was the rebound from the one he said he truly loved..

 

Anyway to answer your question, Guest - one thing I've learnt in my unsuccessful dating career is that actions speak louder than words. Ignore what he says and concentrate on what he does. If you were the love of his life, why did he leave you for her? Obviously she is more important to him at this point in time than you are. The ways of the heart are not to be analyzed, some things just happen which beggar rational explanation. Begin NC and try and move on from this confused guy. Too many exes on the scene is always bad news IMO. Don't join the pile.

 

Sorry if this sounds harsh, I know how hard it is. (((Hugs)))

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