would this bother you?

[Noos]

By way of background - I come from a blended family - my dad had two kids from his first marriage, one daughter who 19 years older than I am and a son, 15 years older than I am. My brother's partner of 3-4 years gave birth to their first child in January and yesterday was his christening. My brother has two daughters, aged 16 and 13 from his former marriage. The 13-year-old daughter was christened also. My birthday was on Thursday.

 

Okay - So my sister and my half-sister were asked to be godmothers to my niece. I was fine with that. However, I went to the church service and every sibling relative of the parents was chosen as a godparent to one of the kids plus some of my brother's girlfriends former nextdoor neighbours.

 

I was the only sibling not involved in the ceremony and her ex-neighbours also got in before me. I was also the only one out of our generation still sitting in the seats with the grandparents etc. So i felt pretty miffed about that.

 

My birthday was on Thursday and I didn't get a phone call from my brother, his girlfriend or the teenage girls. They forgot my birthday. Yet one of the neighbours daughter had a birthday and my nieces, brother and his girlfriend not only remembered her birthday but gave her a present in front of me.

 

I'm closer than my sister is to my brother. I am the one who buys all their birthday and Christmas presents on behalf of our family and took my brother's girlfriend under my wing when she first came into our family. I bought both Christening presents and the birthday present for my niece's birthday next Thursday (9th).

 

Do you think I have a right to feel a bit disappointed? My older half-sister and full sister don't think it matters.

[Adunaphel]

Would it bother me?

You bet.

I'd feel much more than a bit disappointed.

 

I suspect you have been so nice to them for so long, without really expecting anything is return, that they are giving you for granted.

 

Perhaps you should talk to them about it - in a light but matter-of-factly way.

What you other relatives think about it is not really relevant - perhaps they are just used to the way he is, but I don't see why you should not point it out it to your brother.

 

or perhaps you should just become a little less nice and thouhghtful - there are a lot of other ways to spend time and money than on the birthday of someone who does not care to acknowledge yours.

 

Were they aware that it was your birthday? i.e. did you reminded them? Some people are just bad at remembering birthdays and do not think about them unless they get reminded.