should I...or shouldn't I?

[Dana]

I've met a wonderful man...on-line...we talked for several months...then we met a month ago, in person. We see each other several times a week...as our schedules allow. I'm so scared of my feelings..I believe I'm in love with him! I was married to a very mean man for 14 years. I've only been seperated for 10 months, divorced for 1 month. We are considering moving in together. I think of him continually...all day long...every day. I miss him terribly when we are apart....could this be true love so soon? He is everything I've dreamed of..and he accepts my kids...Bonus! He is a Leo...I am a scorpio. Any suggestions???? Please help!

[Cici]

Only you can decide when you are ready to commit to another relationship. But getting involved when you're on the rebound can be hurtful and dangerous, especially women who were involved in abusive relationships (either emotional or physical). I found myself over and over agian getting involved with men who weren't necessarily good for me becuase I felt I needed to be validated by them...I deluded myself into thinking I was deeply in love when how can you be deeply in love after knowing someone only a few months?

 

It's not healthy to want to be around this one person 24/7. The healthy relationship would involve two individuals who have separate lives which enmesh at certain points but are not completely intertwined. That way you can have your space when you deem it necessary. If you truly care for this man, then wait to move in with him. Continue to see him as your schedules allow, try to cultivate a life not so dependent on him! If you still see things in the same light in a few months, then consider moving in with him.

 

Think of the children, too. They are experiencing a lot of turmoil in their lives. Regardless of whether he was a good father or not, you ex was their father, and it does cause some psychological trauma to have such a drastic change occur in their lives. Let your children settle into their life without their father present, let them get their bearings. Wait a few months. If it's true love, it will stay strong and true and you'll be happier in the end.

 

Good luck!

I've met a wonderful man...on-line...we talked for several months...then we met a month ago, in person. We see each other several times a week...as our schedules allow. I'm so scared of my feelings..I believe I'm in love with him! I was married to a very mean man for 14 years. I've only been seperated for 10 months, divorced for 1 month. We are considering moving in together. I think of him continually...all day long...every day. I miss him terribly when we are apart....could this be true love so soon? He is everything I've dreamed of..and he accepts my kids...Bonus! He is a Leo...I am a scorpio. Any suggestions???? Please help!