I'm finally going to do it but don't know how!

[Fun2BMe]

After months of suffering, contemplating and changing my mind, I think I am finally ready to give the therapist a call for treatment. My question is, what do I tell him when I call? That I feel messed up in the head and need his help?

 

He had given me his cell phone number so he will be answering the phone himself, not a receptionist. I had called his office once after hours and left a message and when we met he said he had called me but because I had never received his call he would give his direct number to me, so I don't want to go back to calling his office after he so generously gave me his direct number. He is friends with my bf and I had met him at a party, so I feel strange calling him saying I feel like I need treatment like a psycho. What do I say?

 

I'm scared to call. I thought about going to someone else, but he is supposed to be the best in the field and treats patients without medication. I think in the long run I would get more help from him and save years of time of getting stuck with another therapist and possibly have a bad experience, something that has always happened to me in the past.

 

I feel like I have to do this before I change my mind again. Any advice or encouragement would be much appreciated.

[norajane]

Just call and tell him you'd like to get some help with some things that have been troubling you and ask if he's accepting new patients at this time.

[PussInHeels]

You should be careful if the therapist is acquainted with you outside of a doctor-patient relationship. But if you think he's the best doc for the job and you feel comfortable, give it a try. If it doesn't work out, you can try someone else. If he's as good of a therapist as you say he is, he can recognize that even people he knows need to talk to someone sometimes, and he shouldn't judge you.

 

What you need to consider though, is the position you will place him in if you need to talk to him about some issues that involve your bf. Your bf may also not be comfortable with this scenario. If he's a really good therapist, he will be able to distance himself and still be of help to you. However, even good therapists may find themselves in an ethical pickle. The fact that he gave you his direct number says that he doesn't see a problem in seeing you.

 

I guess if it were me, and I really liked the idea of talking to this guy, I would give it a shot, and ask him myself if knowing me will be an issue in the treatment.

[whichwayisup]

Fun, I honestly feel because your boyfriend is friends with this guy, you need to find a therapist on your own, someone who your boyfriend doesn't know. Just think that you'll be more worried that you won't trust this therapist, and he'll tell your boyfriend stuff...

 

Anyway, I am glad that you're open to therapy, once you find the right person to talk to, you'll do great!!

[Fun2BMe]

Puss, it's not that I know him and fear of my personal relationship interfering with a professional one. I only met him once. Yes my bf knows him and I am suspecting it is party because he himself may have been or still is a patient of his, I don't know and haven't asked, but from the party I went to they were all very professional people and my bf seemed to be very close to all of them so it doesn't mean for example he is a patient or customer of all that were present.

 

I as initially worried about the conflict that my bf knows him, but he is in fact a professional. I bought his book on amazon and have read how much he has helped so many patients so I have hope he might be able to help me. I'm just scared of getting the ball rolling, of making that first call to set up an appointment. I don't know what to say. What if he will find my problems too insignificant? I wouldn't even know where to start from. This might be the feeling I have with any therapist I choose.

[PussInHeels]

What if he will find my problems too insignificant? I wouldn't even know where to start from. This might be the feeling I have with any therapist I choose.

 

Your problems must not be insignificant to you, and thus, they are worth talking about. Therapists aren't just there for very disturbed or psychotic people. Even people who describe themselves as functional or normal have times when they need someone else to help them cope with something. If you're at the point where you've decided to talk to someone, then you really should, no matter how small the problem may seem.

[PussInHeels]

If you don't know where to start, start with how you feel. You can even tell him that you don't know where to start. After telling how you've been feeling, you can even just tell him about your day so far and how things during the day made you feel. He'll know what questions to ask you and where to direct the conversation.

[alphamale]

I thought about going to someone else, but he is supposed to be the best in the field and treats patients without medication.

How can he be the best if he never prescribes meds? Sometimes meds are needed...

[PussInHeels]

How can he be the best if he never prescribes meds? Sometimes meds are needed...

 

You can be a good therapist and not prescribe meds. Sometimes meds are needed, but it is best many times to try environmental and behavioral changes before leaping to meds. Besides, what if he's not an MD? Psychologists and counselors can't prescribe anything, they are not physicians.

[bab]

How can he be the best if he never prescribes meds? Sometimes meds are needed...

 

Maybe he's a psychologist and when the case merits it, will refer his patients to a psychiatrist for drugs. Not always, but lots of times psychologists are better at the psychotherapy part of treatment than psychiatrists.

[Fun2BMe]

How can he be the best if he never prescribes meds? Sometimes meds are needed...

 

I would think that if meds are absolutely needed he would refer them to someone else. He has a PhD but not an MD license, is a psychologist not psychiatrist so those going to him know that they will not be getting any prescriptions.

[alphamale]

Not always, but lots of times psychologists are better at the psychotherapy part of treatment than psychiatrists.

I agree with this but as more research is done we're finding out that many mental and psycholgical problems are medically based...

 

try "talk therapy" on a paranoid schizophrenic...

[PussInHeels]

Maybe he's a psychologist and when the case merits it, will refer his patients to a psychiatrist for drugs. Not always, but lots of times psychologists are better at the psychotherapy part of treatment than psychiatrists.

Very true. And sadly, health insurance companies are actually starting to limit the time the psychiatrist can spend with a patient, making effective psychotherapy more difficult. I want to be want of the few psychiatrists that doesn't let insurance tell them how to run their practice. I probably won't make any money, but whatever. I'll eat.

[Fun2BMe]

How can he be the best if he never prescribes meds? Sometimes meds are needed...

 

You know, there's no scale to judge anyone as the best except for word of mouth and success record. I will say though that in the past I have seen psychiatrists. They almost always prescribe a med by the second, the most 3rd visit. It has sent a message to a sensitive person like myself that they don't want to listen to me and I have stopped treatment. Then later I have given in and taken medications only to have the same problems, without them being explored verbally.

 

So I am looking forward to see a psychologist who is so good he doesn't have to resort to numbing down his patients with medications in order to help. His book has testimonies from very famous people and he rarely takes on new patients so that's why as against therapy as I've been after not getting help from it, I am feeling desperate and feel he might provide the type of help I need.

 

And yes, some people have problems that arise spontaneously from chemical imbalances that can't be traced to any life events that have triggered their unhappiness or bad behaviors. Medication would do more good than talking to them, but even they I would think could benefit by learning how to cope and deal with the problems that arise from their brain chemistry the way it is. And as strange as this sounds, I think part of my fear is that I will finally get the help I need.

[alphamale]

I will say though that in the past I have seen psychiatrists. They almost always prescribe a med by the second, the most 3rd visit. It has sent a message to a sensitive person like myself that they don't want to listen to me and I have stopped treatment. Then later I have given in and taken medications only to have the same problems, without them being explored verbally.

thats fine F2BM....do what you think is best. Personally I think many of these "talk therapists" are charlatans at best and frauds at worst. If a number of psychiatrists thought you need meds then you probably do.

[PussInHeels]

The problem is that a lot of people that come to psychiatrists are looking for a medicated solution. It's gotten to the point now that if you're a psychiatrist in an outpatient setting, you think the people that come to you instead of a psychologist are open to medication. It doesn't help that there are commercials for anti-depressant and anti-anxiety medication on the TV all the time. "Feeling tired? Stressed? Hopeless?" Ok, how many Americans did that just describe??? Pharmaceutical companies make a killing on psych meds, and psychiatrists feed the revenue.

[Fun2BMe]

thats fine F2BM....do what you think is best. Personally I think many of these "talk therapists" are charlatans at best and frauds at worst. If a number of psychiatrists thought you need meds then you probably do.

 

Well, all I can say is that I have tried meds and they have not made me any happier or changed my behavior, only numbed me to not feel anything temporarily. As far as his character is concerned, he has taught at a major university and had I thought his books were BS I wouldn't think much of him. Also he is so booked he only rarely takes on new cases by personal referral only. I guess it can't hurt me to give it a try. I'm already on the fence about it so chances are I'll change my mind anyways, especially with your feedback.

[alphamale]

Pharmaceutical companies make a killing on psych meds, and psychiatrists feed the revenue.

You're forgetting the hundreds of thousand of people who's lives are being positively changed by these meds. And I mean drastic postiive changes...

[PussInHeels]

You're forgetting the hundreds of thousand of people who's lives are being positively changed by these meds. And I mean drastic postiive changes...

I'm not forgetting them, nor do I say medication is of no use. But do you really think the companies have the suicidal or OCD person in mind when they make these commercials? And let's not forget how much they cost here, it's ridiculous. I take medication myself, and I think it can be helpful, but it's not for everyone and I don't think it's fair for the companies to keep pushing their product ornthe people or emptying the pockets of the people who really need it. I don't want to be a part of that system.

[Fun2BMe]

You're forgetting the hundreds of thousand of people who's lives are being positively changed by these meds. And I mean drastic postiive changes...

 

That's why if his approach does not help them, they are free to walk out his office and step into a psychiatrists office, just like I did not get help from psychiatrists and having freely chosen to see a psychologist for a change! You are so extreme and closed minded sometimes it amazes me. You probably think chiropractors are a bunch of voodoo doctors too yet many patients get help from them after the medications their doctors prescribed didn't do sh%% for them.

[PussInHeels]

There is no cure all magic medication. For example, many people suffer severe psychological disturbances from triggers that they endure in their daily lives. These triggers have to be dealt with/ removed. Even with medication, if the original cause of the problem is not removed or modified, results are poor.

[alphamale]

You are so extreme and closed minded sometimes it amazes me.

well so what if I am!!! I have my opinions that are formed by my unique life experiences and I stick by them.

[Green]

U can do it fun2beme, just call and say what u want and who cares hes your therapist he should expect u to have problems so dont wory about how you come off. just be like I need to see you and fast. tell us about ur probs to girl just talking about what ever is on ur mind should make you feel lighter

[PussInHeels]

I was placed on a fairly high dosage of sertraline for my anxiety and depression, but my psychiatrist had to work with me to reduce stress in my life and combat my anxiety. That's what helped me. The sertraline took the edge off and made me functional, but it didn't make my problems go away. I did.

[Fun2BMe]

well so what if I am!!! I have my opinions that are formed by my unique life experiences and I stick by them.

 

So if there are 2 approaches to mental therapy, one being through medication and the other by getting advice to change behavior, and the medication didn't work, you would discourage someone suffering from their misery from getting help through behavior modification therapy. You might have experiences that are successful with medication, but keep in mind they have not helped me. I still have a bottle of zoloft, that is about time I toss out. It only reminds me a failed attempt to correct my behavior by making me numb.