I'm driving myself insane....im very depressed today :(

[hugznkisses21]

Im not really sure where to start....

 

I am a worry-er and do have anxiety sometimes....

 

So about 3 weeks ago my bf found his best friend dead in hiss apartment from a suicide - this has been the worst thing ever....he is in so much pain - and naturally i worry alot about him....i was so scared - i myself am not strong so i have showed ALOT of emotion to what he is feeling cause i care about him...so inturn he has worried about me.

 

He is getting a bit better i suppose and it is going to be a very very long time i know. I just want him back - to his happy self. This has put alot of pressure on our relationship and I have put alot of pressure on myself - i worry about him and he knows this and in turn i have beaten myself up for not being strong for him and now i think he is apearing better infront of me so i dont get upset.

 

I can not help being emotional and the last thing i want is for him to feel he can not open up around me. Im so depressed today....im worried about him 24/7 when im not with or talking to him - and all day today i have initiated all the contact - he isnt usually like that - even after this all happened. I think i have screwed up with being a good supporter. And when i do contact him - he seems ok - joking and stuff - but mostly making fun of me - then just being like - gotta go bye....i dont know what to think. so hun's no anything...

 

Im depressed, worried about him, worried about us and just a mess...i dont want him to hide how he feel - and i want this to ALL go away...im not strong like him to help him through this the best way ya know...

I think i just need someoone unbiast to talk to...can anyone help

[IpAncA]

Sorry to hear about what happend. Have you or him talked to anyone about it because that can be a very tramatic event for someone to go thru especially if it was his best friend? In time things will get better but I think talking to someone like a counselor would be a good idea.

[hugznkisses21]

i think i may do that - but as of right now i dont think he looks at me as someone he can lean on which is making me feel so depressed

[IpAncA]

I think you should focus on yourself right now and try to stop worrying so much about him. You both worrying about each other isn't helping. All you can do is tell him that your there for him if he wants to talk about anything and let it play out.

 

You could try this: When he calls or you call him, try to be positive, make him laugh, talk about something else.

[Guest]

sorry not signed in...

 

I just don't want to come off as i don't care - but i know what u are saying