Should I call her ?

[panzer6]

OK guys, got a dumb question for you all. It's her birthday tomorrow, she told me that she doesn't want to celebrate it. I know she is kinda miserable right now and she said that she just wants the day to pass without any fuss. I think she is just feeling lousy and maybe a little sorry for herself. She has had some pretty bad birthdays in the past, including 1 with me. Im not sure if I should call her or not. I know she has been pretty crappy to me but I feel that I should at least call her and wish her a good day. I don't know if she will even answer my call since she is a little pissed at me right now. What do you guys think?

[bina]

panzer6,

 

i don't post much at all, and visit the website just as seldomly, so i have no idea what your story is. i have no idea how long you dated, who broke up with whom, your ages, etc. and honestly, i don't care.

 

that being said, you two obviously got close enough to date one another and become close, but then it just fell apart. **** happens sometimes, but that doesn't mean you have to lower yourself too.

 

my advice, be a gentleman. be nice, but not a chump, and also know your boundaries, without being a jerk. hence, be a gentleman and call her. just say something along the lines of, "i know today is your birthday and know it's a special day for you. i want to wish you a happy birthday, let you know that i remembered the importance of this day, and hope that you're doing well."

 

that's all you need to say. by doing something so simple as that, you will not be coming across as a chump or a wimp, but rather as a respectable man who realizes and accepts that someone was once important in his life. hence, you'd be a gentleman. and if she responds negatively to something as simple as that, then it'd be really damn obvious - to myself at least - that the problem lie elsewhere and not inside of me.

 

but then again, like i previously mentioned, i have no idea what your background is and am not going to do any research. so if my advice just seems bad, then by all means do not take it. after all, it's advice from a complete stranger. good luck buddy.

[dropdeadlegs]

Can you text message her? I don't know anything about your story, past, or whatever, either (sorry, but feeling lazy and this site moves very slowly for me even on a fast DSL connection.) I only say that because over two years ago when me and my current love were on a break he sent me birthday wishes by text and I appreciated it. But I kinda like birthday hullaballoo. Of course our history was brief and our break was was fairly brief too (History at that time was 7 weeks, break was about 14 weeks.)

 

Take that for what it's worth to your situation.