Crazy in love

[crazy_in_love]

I have known this guy since high school I used to have a major crush on him and I happen to meet up with him a while after i graduated high school. We spent everyday together after our first encounter (he would always call me and come over my house just sit and watch some movies.). He told me that I was the first girl he has ever hung out with that he was able to open up easily. He has had bad experiences in the past with his other ex girlfriends and his mom abandoned him and his brother when they were young. Just recently he tells me that things are moving too fast for him and that he doesnt want to rush into anything because when we started hanging out he had just gotten out of a 3 year relationship. He says he likes me and that when he is ready to get in a relationship he will definately want to try to see if we could work out. But that is not the problem, the problem is that we are also "friends with benefits" so things are getting harder for me because I am getting stronger feelings for him. I really want to be in a relationship with him but I also dont want to rush him into anything he is not ready to do. He really means alot to me and I really care about him but sometimes I really just dont know what to do. Should I try dating other ppl? I am very confused because I am afraid to ask him what I want to know mostly because I am afraid of the answer. I wish I knew just how he felt about me and if he does have feelings for me or if its just the sex!!!! Can someone give me some advice!

[norajane]

Stop the benefits, the sex. If you're starting to develop feelings, and he says he's not ready for a relationship, this will be disastrous for you unless you stop having sex with him. Be honest - just as he told you he's not ready for a relationship, you can tell him you're not able to keep sleeping with him and need to stick with the "friends" part of the relationship.

 

Yes, absolutely start dating people. Maybe you'll meet someone who is ready for a relationship. Maybe he'll become ready for a relationship when he's not getting the no-strings-attached sex from you anymore and he sees you're not hanging around waiting for him to be 'ready'.