Holy crap, you're not going to believe this.

[thecount]

Hi everyone, hope you remember me. The guy with g/f's ex keeps calling her"

 

well, grab on to your seats, Here we go.

 

Back in Sept of this year, My g/f and i were suppose to go to a wedding. the Groom had called my g/f and told her that it may not be a good idea if she showed up because he's good friends with her ex boyfriend and didn't want any problems at his wedding. the ex has a bad temper problem. (I didn't know anything about that convo).

 

One day, my g/f called me and told me all about this fight the bride and groom had over a bachelor party that went too far. The bride(her friend) went nuts over it and canceled the wedding. I was like that's horrible. hung up and said to myself I better call and cancel the room before it's too late. When I called the people at the hotel said that the wedding had already taken place a week earlier. I couldn't believe what i heard. I called her up screaming. what is wrong with you, why are you lying to me about that? She said it's not a lie, it really happend the bride told them not to say anything. She said I'll have the bride call you herself, she went on to tell me how the bride was so distort over this and scratched her face, fell on the floor banged her head...

 

well, a few days ago, while I'm at work. I went to fix a few computers at work, and i noticed that someone had left a website open, and I walked over to shut it down, and i noticed wedding pictures. Through a quick look the couple looked familiar, Looked at the names and my heart dropped. I sat there and looked through all the pictures and guess what i found? My darling g/f with her ex. they were in 3 different pictures together.

 

I couldn't work anymore, i was sick to my stomech. I went home and called her up. "Get you're ass over here, pick up all your things, right now, and get the F*** out of my life". She had called me back and said "baby, what's wrong"? i told her "I will not talk to you over the phone, you get over here now or all your things are going to be in the garbage".

 

When she got there i didn't ask about the wedding right away. She had gone to Atlantic City NJ that friday. it was her birthday weekend and there was a teachers convention so she went with a few friends.

 

The first thing I said was who did you go to AC with? she started crying and said I was with my friends, and yes, he (the ex)came down late. She had called me all night from there. Telling me "I love you, I love only you, I miss you".... She told me that he came down in hopes that she would take him back. I asked how did he know you were going to be there?, she told me that he had called her and told her that he was coming. She told me that they have been speaking on the phone for the past 2 months, (when she had told me that she would never contact him again) there they go calling eachother again. She said that they have gone for coffee a few times, and while she's telling me this I take out the 3 pictures that I had printed out at work and she said "yes, I went to the wedding but i didn't go with him. i went alone, and stayed with my friend that night". She said that he was there with his g/f. i told her I didn't see any pictures of him with his g/f but i do see a picture of you and him getting close with eachother. She said that the bride has more pictures and she would show me that he was there with her.

 

She cried and said that that morning her sister had told her she needs to tell me the truth, she has taken this way too far. and that she's a fool. She can't continue doing this. She feared that I would leave her and didn't know how to approch me about it.

 

I asked her why are you doing this to me? If you don't love or care about me why didn't you just leave? She said her plan was never to leave me, she thought that I was getting ready to leave her, because she has melanoma, and that she may not be able to have kids because of the medication she's taking. She did have a miscarriage back in janurary, and still to this day can't let it go. She obsessed over it. Still crys about that.

 

She thought that before I leave her she would set him up so she won't be alone with no one to take care of her. She said "I know what that sounds like, but that's my fear". So I said "the only reason you're with me is because i take care of you? Get out now"!

 

She said that it's because she loves me, that's why she doesn't want to let me go. I said, "If you love me so much why run around like that? why treat me like ****, these are reasons for someone to leave". She swares that there was never any sex involved. No kissing nothing like that. She has never cheated on me ever.

 

I don't know what to believe. i don't know if she finally came clean with everything, that she's willing to stay with me and only me unconditionally. i told her that's the only way i would stay. and i just don't want to hear a word about this guy. I dont want to hear the words i love you. that doesn't mean anything to me anymore. you would have to show me. prove it to me. make me believe it. if you can't, leave and don't ever look back. If you can do that. then stay and never act like this again. There will be no more chances.

 

She Changed her phone number. I guess it's a start

 

I'm torn like you can't believe.

[Spinderella]

Thats really awful, I feel for you.

I think she has too many excuses. You are right to go NC with her at this point. If she really wants you to trust her, she will hve to work out where she is coming from, and then come and work on building your trust of her up. I think she sounds as though she has too many problems she needs to deal with, before getting involved with anybody.

Take care, and work on getting over this.

[tanbark813]

With as much as she has already lied, do you really think she'd tell you the truth now? Most people in that situation will only admit to as much as is necessary to appease the other person.

 

But you do know that she went to the wedding, the ex was there, and she didn't want you there. You really think she's being faithful to you?

[westernxer]

I think she has melanoma of the brain.

[daphne]

count,

 

I don't see any obvious signs that your ex cheated but I will say one thing. Once a liar always a liar. She was trying to get away with something and that was entirely uncool. Maybe she was trying to play both sides til she figures out what the hell she's doing. I'm glad you're not blaming yourself and upset and letting her walk all over you. A lot of people do it and the screwed up person gets away with murder. She tried to pull a fast one on you and you didn't put up with it.

 

I don't know how you're going to be able to trust her. It's almost like she stole your credit card and was about to make a purchase but got caught and is now sorry.

[D-Lish]

The whole sordid thing sounded fishy before with your earlier posts, and it still sounds fishy now. (or smells fishy, whatever).

 

I don't think you can trust her. What she did was disrespectful and inappropriate at the very least.

 

How could you ever trust her again? How can you trust her friends if they contribute to the lies and manipulations?

 

She's bad news....

D

[thecount]

In my other post I said that her ex called her and he said that it was great beining with you last night--talk to you tomorrow.

 

She told me that she did ask him about that, and asked why did you say that. his responce was. because. that's it, just because.

 

I told her that I really don't buy it. why would a guy risk making an ass out himself like that? Let's just say if i didn't here it, and only you heard that. Why would you still be speaking to him? that's a sign of someone who's about to loose it. am I wrong there?

 

She still swears that nothing ever happend, and she knows that what she did was wrong. very wrong, and is very sorry. I told her "you're just going to have to show me, and make me believe it, I kindly reminded her that she hurt me. Not just once but many times.

 

She asked "what can i do to make you believe me"? I told her, you should already know what you have to do. i don't need to tell you.

 

I hate this because I do want to believe her, I love her. You just can't turn that off. I'm not going to be a fool and stay while she's treating me like crap. As much as i love her I will walk away.

 

I saw her this weekend, and while we were together all i can see was the pictures of her and her ex, and I felt dirty just being next to her. She couldn't even look at me at first. She tried to hold back the tears, and can here were the lies. One lie after another. She has a lot of work to do. It's not going to be easy for her. I've giving her too many 2nd chances. It's time she puts up or shuts up.

[D-Lish]

Seriously, you should reconsider giving this girl a second chance.

All the lies and manipulations...

 

She's only sorry NOW because she got caught. She was fine before she got caught, now she's trying to do a whole lot of fancy talking to get herself out of this situation. Where was her devotion and compassion for you when she was out whooping it up behind your back with her ex at a wedding she lied to you about?

 

Enough's enough.

How could you possibily trust her again?

[ddnnee]

sounds like she is trying to keep 2 men, one for back up. it is right that you leave her so that she can go back to her ex. it is hard to leave the one you love most, but you have to or else she will ruin your life.

[Guest]

Run fast and don't ever turn your head back. She doesn't deserve you, she's a liar full with excuses trying to make her life comfortable at your expense. What would you do the next time she does something like this? Give another chance? I know how do you feel, because I'm in exact same situation. Even worse, have kids, been married for her for a long time, divorced her, then we got back together and she started a story similar to yours with her ex b/f. Now she swears she wants me only, but how to believe. I've been told that before we divorced. I'm torn like you, but the more I think with my upper head(sorry!) the more I understand I have to get out of this magic circle of lies and broken promises. Do yourself a favor, forget her, there're lots of honorable women who stay behind their words and the men they choose. I hope I'll find one and wish you find yours too!