PinkLady Posted May 21, 2002 Share Posted May 21, 2002 I've been seeing a guy for two weeks, going on dates and staying at his house. He calls me every night etc. I was wondering when you all think its acceptable to call him my boyfriend???? Just curious! Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted May 21, 2002 Share Posted May 21, 2002 And why is that question so important at this point if you're spending a lot of time together and enjoying yourselves? You can call him your boyfriend when the two of you express to each other that each is not seeing any other person. At this point, he may be exploring that possibility or he may have already made his decision to see only you. Wait another week or two and ask him if he's seeing anybody else (doesn't sound like it to me, but you never know). If not, tell him you aren't either. Then ask him if he considers you and he to be a couple...boyfriend and girlfriend. Then ask him for the badge and certificate. Link to post Share on other sites
PinkLady Posted May 21, 2002 Share Posted May 21, 2002 Thanks for that piece of advice Tony! It has helped. I was about to rush in and ask him if we were a couple but you've warned me off that thanks! It would probably scare him off slightly since we are on the terms of getting to know each other, though it is more than just friends if you know what I mean! Thanks again!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted May 21, 2002 Share Posted May 21, 2002 I know exactly what you mean and I think you've made a very wise decision. Playing it cool, at least for a reasonable amount of time, is always a great idea. I don't think it would be good for you, if you are seeking a long term relationship, to be sexually involved with someone for any long period of time without a committment. If that's where you are, give it two or three weeks more MAX. Guys don't approach sex the same way many gals do when it comes to equating the experience with committment. Link to post Share on other sites
PinkLady Posted May 21, 2002 Share Posted May 21, 2002 I totally agree with you! I'm definitely not seeing anyone alongside him so he has committment from me. I think you need some committment from both sides, even if the relationship isn't 'serious' as such. I don't wanna be sleeping with a guy who's seeing other girls alongside me! We aren't fully sexually involved, but we're getting there, ready to move onto the next stage at any time, but i'm not gonna do that until he's made it clear we are having a relationship with some firm committment! Link to post Share on other sites
velvet Posted May 22, 2002 Share Posted May 22, 2002 As hard it may get, contain yourself until you really know this person. Cuddle, sleepover, whatever, just get a better idea of who he is first. I have dated men for months at a time before I found out who they really are and what exactly was wanted from me. Two weeks is not long enough. This guy could be seeing three or four others women behind your back. He could be a serial killer. Who knows? Only him, but take your time. Dont rush things. If he is really into you and after you two have the talk about seeing other people you will get a better idea of who he is. You could make him wait nine months if you wanted to. Link to post Share on other sites
PinkLady Posted May 22, 2002 Share Posted May 22, 2002 I intend to contain myself I don't want to rush into having sex (he would be my first anyway). Hopefully things will work out between us, but even if he does want to make our relationship official, I still won't rush into anything I'm not ready for - however horny I get!!!!! Dating is hard lol! Link to post Share on other sites
clia Posted May 22, 2002 Share Posted May 22, 2002 For your own peace of mind, don't sleep with him or sleepover with him or let things progress too far physically until you know where you stand. If you do, you will only end up feeling worse and stressing about what your relationship is, which always leads to trouble and outbursts. Also, you are better off waiting for him to bring it up. When girls bring up exclusivity talks too soon, all guys tend to hear is "blah, blah, I'm a psycho, blah, blah, I want to marry you, blah, blah, blah." Even if you have good intentions! In the meantime, don't rush it, have a good time, and don't forget to maintain some mystery. Make plans with your girlfriends, go to the gym, go shopping...don't make him the center of your world! Link to post Share on other sites
PinkLady Posted May 23, 2002 Share Posted May 23, 2002 I am trying to not focus all my thoughts on him, but because I like him so much, it is really difficult not to think about him!!!!! All my girlfriends go off with their boyfriends and don't make much of an effort to go out on a girls night or whatever, and I think I'm falling into that category as well!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
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