I know she did this to piss me off and what can i do to get her back!

[Baybee9404]

To make a long story short i have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years now. He has a 3 year old daughter with his ex girlfriend. This girl is always doing things or saying things to make me mad and jealous so i would leave my boyfriend and yes it does work i do get jealous and pissed and take it out on my boyfriend because he dont have the balls to say anything to her and i wont say anything to her because i dont want to give her the satisfaction of letting her know that i cared about she did. Thats what she wants and i wont give it to her. I am better than that. This weekend she sent the daughter home with a picture album and he pictures in it were all of her and 3 of them were her and my boyfriend together. I got so mad when i seen the book and wanted to ripe them up but i want to get back at her what can i do to make her mad and jealous. Please help.

[whichwayisup]

Your boyfriend has to talk to his ex, and somehow you are going to have to deal with accepting that she (the ex) IS going to be a part of your lives because of his daughter.

 

The focus should be ON their daughter - Forget ego's and hurt feelings...Imagine how that little girl feels!!

 

Your boyfriend is with you, not the ex, right? So, talk to him about this if you're feeling insecure and having fears that he is going to leave you and go back to the ex.

 

You can't control what the ex does or says, but you CAN control how you react...Don't DO anything that will piss off the ex, or make her jealous! It's just going to make the situation worse. Be the bigger person and ignore it. And, I gotta say, is it possible that you're over reacting? That she really just wanted to her daughter to have the photo album?

[Baybee9404]

I myself have a 5 year old son with someone else. So i know that no matter what she is going to be in my life just like my ex is because he is my sons fatehr i know that thank you. My ex boyfriend has a girlfriend and i get along with her because the way i see it the more people that love and are good to my son the merry that is what makes me happy i love knowing the fact that i have my exs girlfriend there to help him take care of my son when he is with them on the weekends. I dont and i would never do anything or say anything to her to make her jealous over me in my book my ex is history and that is the way it should be. The past is the past and what went on between me and my ex is between us. To be quit honest i rather talk to his girlfriend instead of him because i know she will do it not him.

[whichwayisup]

I myself have a 5 year old son with someone else. So i know that no matter what she is going to be in my life just like my ex is because he is my sons fatehr i know that thank you.

 

I didn't know that seeing as you didn't post that in your original post, if I had known, I wouldn't have pointed that out to you. Sorry if I stepped on your toes........

[whichwayisup]

I know she did this to piss me off and what can i do to get her back!

This is the title of your post. How is 'what can I do to get her back' going to help the situation? By saying this, you are NOT thinking of your boyfriend's daughter and putting her first. The mature way of handling this is getting your boyfriend to talk to his ex, make her understand that it's over between them and she has to put her daughter first as well, and not try to come between you and your boyfriend.

[Baybee9404]

Trust me sweat heart, My boyfriends ex has 4 kids with 4 different father she is not with any of them. When she dont have a boyfriend she is a bitch and i know she says things and does things to piss me off . When she has a boyfriend she is fine. Why i want to get her back is because i talked to her oldest daughters step mother about it and she said the ex used to do the same thing to her and she never said anything to her or did anything back to her because she said i am better than her and have grown up already. She told me the last time she did something to her was when she got her back the ex didnt like it and knew that the new girlfriend who is now his wife wasnt going to take her **** anymore. Thats why i wanted peoples opinion on how to really tick her off so she will leave me alone.

[Enema]

If you poke a bear with a stick it won't leave you alone, it'll get angrier!

 

Step up and be the adult here, don't succumb to her button-pushing.

[whichwayisup]

Trust me sweat heart, My boyfriends ex has 4 kids with 4 different father she is not with any of them. When she dont have a boyfriend she is a bitch and i know she says things and does things to piss me off . When she has a boyfriend she is fine. Why i want to get her back is because i talked to her oldest daughters step mother about it and she said the ex used to do the same thing to her and she never said anything to her or did anything back to her because she said i am better than her and have grown up already. She told me the last time she did something to her was when she got her back the ex didnt like it and knew that the new girlfriend who is now his wife wasnt going to take her **** anymore. Thats why i wanted peoples opinion on how to really tick her off so she will leave me alone.

 

Sounds like the ex has issues...Even more reason NOT to piss her off and play games.

 

I'm not the one then to help you come up with a scheme to mess her up, honestly I feel that's pretty immature! Sure, in the moment you may feel good about it, but the long term affects are not worth it. Their daughter will be the one who suffers.

 

Good luck and I hope someday you are able to find a way of not letting the ex bug you.

[Buttaflyy]

The best thing you can do is ignore her. In the end she'll realize that she's being immature and hopefully she'll get over him and move on to bothering someone else.

 

Are you handling this the best way you could? Sending pictures of the three of them is probably pretty annoying, but you must always remember that they have a child together and she is the kids mom.

 

I'd let my SO know about the bigger things that she does to annoy me but things like this I'd just ignore. Let him see that he made the better choice in you and that his ex is being immature and is the only one behaving badly. Getting back at her will only entertain her notion that she's getting to you at all.

[Walk]

The problem with wanting to "get the ex" back, is that it will show the ex that she is really getting under your skin. It won't make her back off, she'll try harder because now she's getting a response. Plus, it could drive a wedge between your bf and you.

 

I know this is hard to understand, but the absolute best way to "get back" at someone is to act as though they don't exist. The ex wants attention. Even negative attention. No attention at all will drive her nuts.

 

Think of it this way... have you ever had someone you really wanted to notice you ignore you? A friend, or a crush, or even an ex.. How did that make you feel? Invisible? Unnoticed? Like you weren't even worth that persons time, you were some how "less"...

 

If you react to this ex, you're playing into her game. If you ignore her, it'll hurt her far worse than any action you could've ever taken. Plus, it has the added benefit of making you appear to be the better person, while the ex will seem "crazy" and lose credibility with the people she's trying to impress.

[Buttaflyy]

Baybee9404,

 

I haven't read any of the other posts in this thread until after I've posted, and it seems that everyone is giving you the same advice.

 

Trust me, the best thing to do is to ignore her.

[Grrlish]

He has a 3 year old daughter with his ex girlfriend.

...

This weekend she sent the daughter home with a picture album and he pictures in it were all of her and 3 of them were her and my boyfriend together. I got so mad when i seen the book and wanted to ripe them up but i want to get back at her what can i do to make her mad and jealous. Please help.

 

Your boyfriend has a child with another woman. Unless they're recent pictures and they're mashing on each other, why are you upset? Seems to me that if you love him and love his daughter you would be supportive of both of us parents being present in his daughter's life. I hope you didn't say a single WORD about ANY of that in front of his child!

 

You're second, girl, behind his daughter...at all times. Get over it. Get on-board or get out. You're not his wife and you're not his daughter's mother.

 

That little girl comes first - including having a photo album with pictures of her parents together. Or even framed on a table in the living room. Or wherever the child can see them.

 

What are you trying to 'get her back for'?

 

What is that attitude?

 

If you're that unhappy with his relationship with the mom, then you need to move along. If you're so jealous that you're letting all of that erode your relationship, you need to consider your reactions to her actions or...move along.

 

Why don't you just 'kill her with kindness'? Ignoring her will only create a bigger rift, and it won't do anything to make the situation better for the child.\..who, again, should come first. Try changing your frame of mind. Try changing your reactions. Try creating a warm loving environment for that child, regardless of what her mother does. Try being the bigger and better person.

 

If you don't respect your boyfriend, and if you don't think he has any balls I don't see you you could possibly respect him...what in the hell are you doing with him anyway??

[Baybee9404]

Your right im not his wife yet but i will be on January 21 2007 thats our wedding day. Trust me i havent done anything to the babys mother yet because of the baby i respect the baby and love that baby with all my heart and soul. Ive never done or said anything i shouldnt have infront of her. As a matter of fact my boyfriend is the one who was more pissed than me. Ive even told the babys mother your lucky your daughter protects you and i havent done anything to you because of her. You dont know the whole story so unless you do. Dont sit here and judge me like im the a**hole because im not. She is just jealous of me because im the one with the man, the nice house, a job, and a nice car. She on the other hand still lives with her aunt, old beat up car, works at friendly's, Come on she has 4 kids and they all have different fathers how is your life your only 24 years old. And if she didnt try to kill herself in front of her children then she would have her children but she f*cked up for attention. But that got her now where i know she is doing this because the wedding is fast approaching. When she has a boyfriend she is fine, but when she dont have on she likes to make all her kids fathers girlfriends mad because she is.

[Grrlish]

how is your life your only 24 years old.

??? Me? 24? I'm 41.

 

You dont know the whole story so unless you do. Dont sit here and judge me like im the a**hole because im not.

 

You're right. I don't know the whole story. All I know is what you wrote so that's all I could respond to.

 

In addition to encouraging you to be sure that you're putting the child first, which I did not say that you're not doing and that you're saying that you are doing, I encouraged you to do things that would hopefully reduced your stress level and the amount of drama that you have to deal with. I didn't say that I think you're being an a-hole. Other than the child, I was focusing on trying to give you some concrete advise on how to increase YOUR happiness and calmness.

 

Sorry that I offended you.

[Baybee9404]

HI I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving. I am going to give you an update on what happened about the pictures in the album. Over the weekend my boyfriend was looking through the album and seen the pictures, He freaked out and i asked him what was the matter and he was like did you see these pictures in the album and i told him yea. He was mad because those are not real pictures the kids mother must have scanned them togther and cut and pasted them together. He called her up and was like look listen to me i dont know where you are going putting those made up pictures of us in Raquel's album but it was uncalled for and you pissed me off. Im going to tell you this again for the 100th time you are history in my life, i never loved you nor was i ever in love with you. I just got you pregnant and stayed with you because you were pregnant thats all if it wasnt for Raquel we would ahve never been together at all. Get over me I love my girlfriend and i will be with her forever i dont care if you like it or it tough ****. I only talk to you because of Raquel if i didnt have her you would have disappeared a long time ago. She didnt say anything she just hung up i think she was hurt. But man those pictures were fake, i cant believe it i feel so stupid now i know she is just jealous of me and a wate of my time.

[Anka]

He well, you shouldve returned to her and said something like "wow that was nice album, you did such a good job, we almost thought they were real!, Your very artistic and creative!"

[littlekitty]

He well, you shouldve returned to her and said something like "wow that was nice album, you did such a good job, we almost thought they were real!, Your very artistic and creative!"

 

Yep, that would have been the more dignified way of doing it!

[lovefool525]

Damn girl, it sounds as though you and I are in the same boat! My boyfriends ex-gf is a psychotic biotch! She has 3 kids with 3 diff men...She thought she was lucky when she got preggo with him and locker her claws in with him. He didn't love her, and he left her and he is now with me, but she is still a thorn in my side. She thinks they had the perfect relationship, but it was only because he got her pregnant that he stayed with her....so my question to you is, how do you put up with it? I f*kken hate his ex....I cannot stand her, and you know, I have never met this girl in real life!!! I have had thoughts too to piss her off, but she is gonna turn it around on me and make me look like the bad guy....that's how psycho she is. I choose to leave her alone and not bother with her antics, she even talks about me on her public profile how pathetic!

So can you help me, how do you cope with your future husbands crazy ex??

[Baybee9404]

Until that child is old enough to take care of themself, then she will always be a torn in your side. Dont get me wrong everything that bitch does i used to get pissed off and stress about and even flip out on my boyfriend because of her but then i realized that is what she wants, she wants me and my boyfriend to fight and to argue and hopefully brake up, while she can sit and laugh about it, so i caught on to her game and just played along with her. I go out of my way to be nice to her you know what they say keep your loves ones close but keep your enemies even closer, even though i dont want to but i know it pisses her off more that i will not give in to her and start a fight, it makes me look like the better to my boyfriend, The child lives with us and goes to the mothers when the mother feels like taking her on the weekend. She used to call my house every night to talk to her daughter i know she did it to piss me off so i know it is mean but when she was on the phone i would tease the daughter and she would get mad and cry, but it made it look like the daughter didnt want to talk to the mother so she stopped calling. I know she put those pictures together because in my car there is a picture of us as a family and she didnt like that but oh well. I know it is mean but i hit her were it hurts right though the child, i never say anything bas about the mother to the child i never will but i spoil the **** out of her and never punish or yell at her and i know a few times the mother yelled at the daughter and the daughter told her I HATE YOU I WISH NICOLE WAS MY MOTHER NOT YOU. And the mother was showing the daughter pictures of her and the daughter kept saying the picture of her was me. I loved it. I get all my information from her older daughter who is 11. I dont cope with it i just deal with it get mad but to myself, never take it out on your bf because he will only resent you for it show him you are the better person and he made the right decision on being with you. He will start to hate her soon enough and that is what you want him to hate her, not you. Why havent you met this kids mother yet. I see mine 2 times a week when she takes her daughter i am the one who drops her off to her not my boyfriend yes me. i am the one who answers the phone and when she wants to speak to him i make him put the phone on speaker so she knows i can hear what she is saying. What is her public profile if you dont mind i would like to check it out to see how much of a bitch she really is and that way here we can work together on getting even but in a nicer way.

[Buttaflyy]

Until that child is old enough to take care of themself, then she will always be a torn in your side. Dont get me wrong everything that bitch does i used to get pissed off and stress about and even flip out on my boyfriend because of her but then i realized that is what she wants, she wants me and my boyfriend to fight and to argue and hopefully brake up, while she can sit and laugh about it, so i caught on to her game and just played along with her. I go out of my way to be nice to her you know what they say keep your loves ones close but keep your enemies even closer, even though i dont want to but i know it pisses her off more that i will not give in to her and start a fight, it makes me look like the better to my boyfriend, The child lives with us and goes to the mothers when the mother feels like taking her on the weekend. She used to call my house every night to talk to her daughter i know she did it to piss me off so i know it is mean but when she was on the phone i would tease the daughter and she would get mad and cry, but it made it look like the daughter didnt want to talk to the mother so she stopped calling. I know she put those pictures together because in my car there is a picture of us as a family and she didnt like that but oh well. I know it is mean but i hit her were it hurts right though the child, i never say anything bas about the mother to the child i never will but i spoil the **** out of her and never punish or yell at her and i know a few times the mother yelled at the daughter and the daughter told her I HATE YOU I WISH NICOLE WAS MY MOTHER NOT YOU. And the mother was showing the daughter pictures of her and the daughter kept saying the picture of her was me. I loved it. I get all my information from her older daughter who is 11. I dont cope with it i just deal with it get mad but to myself, never take it out on your bf because he will only resent you for it show him you are the better person and he made the right decision on being with you. He will start to hate her soon enough and that is what you want him to hate her, not you. Why havent you met this kids mother yet. I see mine 2 times a week when she takes her daughter i am the one who drops her off to her not my boyfriend yes me. i am the one who answers the phone and when she wants to speak to him i make him put the phone on speaker so she knows i can hear what she is saying. What is her public profile if you dont mind i would like to check it out to see how much of a bitch she really is and that way here we can work together on getting even but in a nicer way.

 

OMG...you sound like the 11 year old! Everyone involved needs to grow up and dad here needs to take responsibility!

 

I'd keep my kids away from you. Wow...the choices he's made in women!

[justagirliegirl]

You are going to have to deal with this other woman as long as you are married to this guy.

 

I would say that your bf isn't the sharpest tool in the shed either to have unprotected sex with someone who has so many kids and obviously hasn't heard of birth control.

 

As much as you hate her, he loved her at one time and made a baby with her.

 

I would look at the way he treats her and his child. You could be next.

 

Really he sounds like he has too much baggage and drama to marry.

[Baybee9404]

You know what they say what you do to someone else alls comes back 10x worse on you. Dont play with fire because you will get burnt. No never loved her i know he didnt because if he did he would still be with her and marry her. I was told for a source that is close to the kids mother that she used to cut holes in the condom to get pregnant that is how sick she is and it worked. He was with her for 3 weeks and she got pregnant on purpose. He stayed with her through her pregnancy because he stood up for his responsiable but once the baby was born he left and started dating me. And she couldnt deal with that fact so she tried to kill herself to get his attention when the kid was in her care. Thank god for her oldest daughter or the baby probably would have starved to death because she wanted attention.

[alphamale]

but i want to get back at her what can i do to make her mad and jealous. Please help.

does she have a b/f you can have sex with? I don't know, that may work?

[thedon77]

Lol yes she does but he is not my type and besides im not like that. I may not be a million other things but loyal is one thing i am. Sorry but i did tell her boyfriend who by the way is in prison that she told me my boyfriend cheated on me with her and she was with him at that time so he is pissed at her.

[Baybee9404]

Lol yes she does but he is so not my type. I may not be a million other things but loyal is one thing you can say i am. Id never do that to anyone because i wouldnt like it done to me. But thanks for the advice