Meeting the parents

[New Status]

My "new" fiance is meeting my parents for the first time this weekend. My father has hated my friends and particurly people I date. My father is controling and has a difficult personality. I love him, but.....I understand he is difficult. How can I prepare my fiance for meeting him? I want them to get along well, but I am very nervous! Recomendations would be welcome. He has not met them before. My parents are worried he is marrying for VISA status within the US. However, we are planning to move back to Canada and besides that he is here on a NAFTA visa. He does not need to marry me at all. My parents have reservations about our relationship. I don't and he is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Thanks.

[Patrick7573]

Controlling parents can be difficult but that shouldn't stop you from being with who you want. Even if your parents don't like your fiance, that's their problem! They should only care about your happiness and if you definitely see yourself spending the rest of your life with this guy then thats what you should do. Overbearing parents can really be an obstacle in a relationship if you let them. My Ex wasn't strong enough to break away from her family. She wanted to live with her family after we were married. Her family is nice and all but we should have our own life and become our own family. She broke off our engagement so she wouldn't have to leave the safety of home. My parents were young when they got married (18), and their parents(both sides) were against them being together but my parents loved each other so much that they stood up to their families and told them if you're not with us then your against us. They didn't speak for almost a year until their parents finally accepted the relationship. My parents lived dirt poor in Brooklyn just getting by but being they had each other, nothing else mattered. If you truly love this guy but your parents don't, you have to really think decide who is more important in your life... your parents or your life partner?

[Tony T]

YOU ASK: "How can I prepare my fiance for meeting him?"

 

Simply tell your fiance exactly how your father is, how he has always been. Let your fiance know exactly what he can expect out of your dad. If he is already engaged to you and he hasn't met your parents yet, he's got to have figured out by now something strange is going on.

 

If your fiance is understanding, he will consider what you tell him and act and react accordingly. He will not hold your parents behavior against you.

 

I think it's terribly sad and selfish for your father to be such a butthole. However, if he really loves you he will give up his bxstardliness for one evening and act civil towards the man you plan to spend the rest of your life with. If he doesn't, it's his problem and he will regret it.