noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 I'm hearing a very common thread with all of you. He your MARRIED man tells you he does not have sex with his wife anymore. So here's a challenge for you and a test to him. Try to give him a hickey down in his private area and see how that works for you. If they are just friends I'm sure his wife won't be looking closely near his penis so why not? See if he freaks out or not. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 Can you imagine the look on his face when he sees a hicky near his winky? Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Author Share Posted November 23, 2006 Can you imagine the look on his face when he sees a hicky near his winky? :laugh: I think it should be winky hickeys everytime!! whats the difference the OW is the only one near it. ummmm so he says. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 Interesting.... I am no longer an OW because of this. I don't share. She can have him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Author Share Posted November 23, 2006 Interesting.... I am no longer an OW because of this. I don't share. She can have him. it's a good test for their truthfullness don't you think? Link to post Share on other sites
My Fair Katie Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 it's a good test for their truthfullness don't you think? Um, the fact he's married and presumably not letting his wife know he's bonin' another is just about as accurate a test that he lies as the hickey test. Just sayin'. Though, the hickey test does sound like a fun way to exact some revenge. Link to post Share on other sites
KnowHowLoveFeels Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 It won't work. And it's a tad low for my taste. It shows a lack of understanding and self-confidence. Why does it matter whether he is sleeping with his W anyway? I wouldn't believe any man who says that he is not having sex regularly with his W. If it is so important to the OW that he is exclusive with her, she'd have gotten a SG, don't you think? I really think that you are reading too much into many of the OWs' posts. JMHO. Link to post Share on other sites
LucreziaBorgia Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 This reminds me of a guy I dated many years ago. He had gotten out of a LTR and we got together. It was superhot for about six months - and I would put hickeys all over him. He never minded and even encouraged it. Come to find out he failed to tell me that he never really broke up with his GF. They were together and still having sex the entire time that we were (and still are, to this day more than ten years later). Apparently something they (still) like to do is sleep with other people and compare notes with each other. I broke up immediately upon finding out that the GF was still in the picture, but to this day I wonder about what she thought about all those hickeys or if she somehow in a sick way got off on it. Link to post Share on other sites
KnowHowLoveFeels Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 Hickeys are like bruises. He can easily brush it off as being bumped by the corner of a table or something like that. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 it's a good test for their truthfullness don't you think? It sure is.... Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 It won't work. And it's a tad low for my taste. It shows a lack of understanding and self-confidence. Why does it matter whether he is sleeping with his W anyway? I wouldn't believe any man who says that he is not having sex regularly with his W. If it is so important to the OW that he is exclusive with her, she'd have gotten a SG, don't you think? I really think that you are reading too much into many of the OWs' posts. JMHO. This is so true. And that is why I couldn't handle being the OW when I found out he was married. I just can't be part of a triangle. It just isn't me. Exclusivity is paramount to my relationship with a man. Which is why I was an absolutely horrible OW. He picked the wrong girl to mess around with. I don't play that game. And I never will. Link to post Share on other sites
frannie Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 If you can't trust someone you shouldn't be with them in the first place. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 My sentiments exactly. Link to post Share on other sites
Chapter2 Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 Oh no NF, He never once said he wasn't having sex with his wife. What he did say was that he made love to me and had sex with her. In fact, what he talked about mostly was how incredible the sex was with me because of the emotional as well as the physical connection we shared even though she, to this day, thinks it was only an emotional affair and never a physical one. From what I understand, there are many, many BS's who believe this rubbish. Sounds as silly as the OW you are referring to that believe their MM isn't having sex with his wife doesn't it? I can imagine how painful it is to wonder if your husband is really telling the truth about anything anymore. But, just like all human beings, we believe what we must in order to cope. If that means the OW chooses to believe her MM when he says he doesn't have sex with his wife then so be it. Just like the BS who chooses to believe her WS didn't have a physical affair and only an emotional affair. We ALL have coping mechanisms. This is a timely post though for Thanksgiving Day as I have much to be thankful for. Most importantly that I'm not involved with someone who would take their commitment so lightly...or get sucked in...whatever you choose to call it. Happy Turkey Day! I'm hearing a very common thread with all of you. He your MARRIED man tells you he does not have sex with his wife anymore. So here's a challenge for you and a test to him. Try to give him a hickey down in his private area and see how that works for you. If they are just friends I'm sure his wife won't be looking closely near his penis so why not? See if he freaks out or not. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Author Share Posted November 23, 2006 This reminds me of a guy I dated many years ago. He had gotten out of a LTR and we got together. It was superhot for about six months - and I would put hickeys all over him. He never minded and even encouraged it. Come to find out he failed to tell me that he never really broke up with his GF. They were together and still having sex the entire time that we were (and still are, to this day more than ten years later). Apparently something they (still) like to do is sleep with other people and compare notes with each other. I broke up immediately upon finding out that the GF was still in the picture, but to this day I wonder about what she thought about all those hickeys or if she somehow in a sick way got off on it. eeewww really? oh i wonder if they had contests who could get better ones. Yuck. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Author Share Posted November 23, 2006 If you can't trust someone you shouldn't be with them in the first place. LOL and you feel you can trust a married man who is cheating on his wife? Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Author Share Posted November 23, 2006 Oh no NF, He never once said he wasn't having sex with his wife. What he did say was that he made love to me and had sex with her. In fact, what he talked about mostly was how incredible the sex was with me because of the emotional as well as the physical connection we shared even though she, to this day, thinks it was only an emotional affair and never a physical one. From what I understand, there are many, many BS's who believe this rubbish. Sounds as silly as the OW you are referring to that believe their MM isn't having sex with his wife doesn't it? I can imagine how painful it is to wonder if your husband is really telling the truth about anything anymore. But, just like all human beings, we believe what we must in order to cope. If that means the OW chooses to believe her MM when he says he doesn't have sex with his wife then so be it. Just like the BS who chooses to believe her WS didn't have a physical affair and only an emotional affair. We ALL have coping mechanisms. This is a timely post though for Thanksgiving Day as I have much to be thankful for. Most importantly that I'm not involved with someone who would take their commitment so lightly...or get sucked in...whatever you choose to call it. Happy Turkey Day! gosh what a sweet post. sounds like someone is having a rather rough day. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 But it is true, nevertheless. My xMM told his wife that we only had an emotional affair, too. How can any of us believe him? He is obviously sleeping with you and lying to some of us about it (heck, mine lied about being married, for God's sake), and sleeping with us and lying to you about it. Sounds to me that he is lying to all of us. Ick. Link to post Share on other sites
puddleofmud Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 Ah well, the things we think in these kinds of situations...but one is allowed a great deal of latitude considering the emotional state it too often brings us. This is certainly an entertaining tongue in cheek thought. Realistically one may need remember that whether or not the attached partner is having sex with the principle partner--it is that they have a principle relationship which has not always been about sex. A matured relationship contains about a million other aspects. Though one may be unattracted sexually, for a period of time or even if that is completely lost: sex is only one of those aspects and due to a matured relationship, often for many reasons, the least. Those aspects add up to a very deep abiding emotional bond, nonetheless! Those bonds are not easily swayed nor broken and is the one thing the other partner in the relationship does not have which is why one really may not be able to compartmentalize an affair as just being between the attached partner and the OW/M. It really is between three people Persons who may not be having sex and live in the same household probably see each other naked, anyway. Link to post Share on other sites
Chapter2 Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 No NF, Just giving you the honesty you say you so desperately want. You have quite the nerve commenting on whether or not someone's post is "sweet". My post was honest and isn't that what you say you want? gosh what a sweet post. sounds like someone is having a rather rough day. Link to post Share on other sites
Chapter2 Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 LOL and you feel you can trust your husband who cheated on you? This street has two directions. LOL and you feel you can trust a married man who is cheating on his wife? Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Author Share Posted November 23, 2006 chapter2 your bitterness and hatred toward the wife who is blocking your path is shining right through. My situation was very different. My husband was not looking for a piece of ass. I'm sorry you are having such a bad day that you feel the need to attack me on a post that really could have been fun. Link to post Share on other sites
silktricks Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 C2, reading your post(s) makes me very sad for you. You seem to be so full of hate, and especially towards the betrayed wives - far more so than towards the MM. Why do you want to hurt a betrayed wife who is in so much pain and trying so hard to repair her marriage and self-esteem, a woman who has never done anything to you, why do you want her to suffer more? What will you gain from adding to her turmoil? Al of the OW say on these boards that they don't hate the wives, but most post things that prove differently. The reality for me is that I really don't care if my H's affair was purely emotional (as he said) or if it was also physical (as you apparently want me to believe). The truth is that he chose to be with me. When I returned to him (if you've read my story, you know that he had the affair while we were separated), he dropped the OW like a hot rock. He didn't need to tell me about it, as I never would have known. I didn't "catch" him. He chose to do that so that we could repair our marriage with full knowledge. So, I tend to believe him. I have seen and experienced the depth of his love for me as well as the depth of pain over what he did. C2, and the rest of the OW on these boards. I truly wish you every happiness. Though I do wish you to have that happiness with a man who is not already married. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 Chapter2 left her MM, not the other way around. She actually moved, changed her phone number and completely cut him out of her life. She didn't want HIM, not the other way around. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 23, 2006 Author Share Posted November 23, 2006 Chapter2 left her MM, not the other way around. She actually moved, changed her phone number and completely cut him out of her life. She didn't want HIM, not the other way around. yes after he actually asked her to wait 18 years for him. What a great guy that was. How can a man be so selfish? Well at least he was honest. Link to post Share on other sites
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