Chapter2 Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 EXCELLENT POINT!! But it always makes me chuckle when people invoke karma like it's something that doesn't apply to them. We all have lessons to learn in life. I would have thought that karma would engender humility in people, but it's funny how it's almost always those with the most extreme views of what's right and wrong and who glory in the destruction of others who may have gone astray who love to invoke it. Here's another: pride comes before a fall. And that's invoking hubris Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 I don't know what the back story is on your arguments, so I'm keeping well out of that. But it always makes me chuckle when people invoke karma like it's something that doesn't apply to them. We all have lessons to learn in life. I would have thought that karma would engender humility in people, but it's funny how it's almost always those with the most extreme views of what's right and wrong and who glory in the destruction of others who may have gone astray who love to invoke it. Here's another: pride comes before a fall. And that's invoking hubris fine i'll put it this way I believe people will treat you the way you treat them. You disrespect women and their marriages and you in turn will be disrepected. Your whole affair with a married man is nothing but treating you, the hidden secret, with disrespect. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 fine i'll put it this way I believe people will treat you the way you treat them. You disrespect women and their marriages and you in turn will be disrepected. Your whole affair with a married man is nothing but treating you, the hidden secret, with disrespect. This may be true in some cases but not all. You can not treat every situation in black and white, there are grey areas inbetween. One can not always be right. Link to post Share on other sites
frannie Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 fine i'll put it this way I believe people will treat you the way you treat them. You disrespect women and their marriages and you in turn will be disrepected. Your whole affair with a married man is nothing but treating you, the hidden secret, with disrespect. "You in turn will be disrespected" What you wrote on the previous page sounded more like human revenge than karma, but it's probably a moot point. Your last sentence seemed to contradict the previous one. Or were you meaning the MM treated the OW with disrespect? Is karma about to bite him on the bum too..? And what about forgiveness... is karma about to strike those who hounded the OW out of a social circle..? Either way, I'm not really going to get into a debate about who is disrespecting whom, and who has no self-respect and so on and so forth. It's all a matter of opinion. A situation doesn't necessarily imply either blame, guilt, or lack of any personal quality IMHO. I'm sure we will differ in that. Link to post Share on other sites
bonehead Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 You can not treat every situation in black and white, there are grey areas inbetween. One can not always be right. says it all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 "You in turn will be disrespected" What you wrote on the previous page sounded more like human revenge than karma, but it's probably a moot point. Your last sentence seemed to contradict the previous one. Or were you meaning the MM treated the OW with disrespect? Is karma about to bite him on the bum too..? And what about forgiveness... is karma about to strike those who hounded the OW out of a social circle..? Either way, I'm not really going to get into a debate about who is disrespecting whom, and who has no self-respect and so on and so forth. It's all a matter of opinion. A situation doesn't necessarily imply either blame, guilt, or lack of any personal quality IMHO. I'm sure we will differ in that. no he treated her with total respect and would continue to if it didn't hurt me. I've read the emails. I've heard the phone messages BEFORE I went to him aout it. His opinion of her has changed recently when i pointed out that she is no friend of his. A friend would not disrespect our marriage and a friend would not continue to try to contact him when she knows it could put his whole life with his wife and kids in jeopardy. That's not a friend. That is a sick NEEDY individual thinking only of themselves. He realizes that now. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 says it all. No it doesn't. There is NO GRAY. If someone is married then they are MARRIED. Where is the gray?? Unless you want to believe their is so you can persue your own selfish sexual whims with no thought of consequences. Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 Your last sentence seemed to contradict the previous one. Or were you meaning the MM treated the OW with disrespect? Is karma about to bite him on the bum too..? And what about forgiveness... is karma about to strike those who hounded the OW out of a social circle..? Oh and nice jump to conclusions. I did not hound her out of our social circle. She did it to herself. Our friends asked me why we are not friends anymore and i basically said we had a falling out, she thinking she would get sympathy and act like i'm overtly jealous decided to tell our friends the whole story. Needless to say they had ZERO sympathy for her and know if me, one of the least jealous people, had a problem then there was a big one. I got instant phone calls and friends coming over hugging me after she told her story. Including her own sister. Oh and NO NO FORGIVENESS. Why would I ever want someone like that in my life? What would be the purpose of forgiving her??? Link to post Share on other sites
bonehead Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 But EVERY MM AND EVERY OW is not the same. Every situation is NOT the same. My situation is different from yours. Right or wrong? Can you say I am just like your H? Can you say you are just like my XW? Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 But EVERY MM AND EVERY OW is not the same. Every situation is NOT the same. My situation is different from yours. Right or wrong? Can you say I am just like your H? Can you say you are just like my XW? Of course all situations are different but they all began with the same reality. SOMEONE WAS MARRIED. No gray there. It is a legal and oftentimes religious agreement between two people not THREE. One of these is not like the other. One does NOT belong. Link to post Share on other sites
KnowHowLoveFeels Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 Oh and nice jump to conclusions. I did not hound her out of our social circle. She did it to herself. Our friends asked me why we are not friends anymore and i basically said we had a falling out, she thinking she would get sympathy and act like i'm overtly jealous decided to tell our friends the whole story. Needless to say they had ZERO sympathy for her and know if me, one of the least jealous people, had a problem then there was a big one. I got instant phone calls and friends coming over hugging me after she told her story. Including her own sister. Oh and NO NO FORGIVENESS. Why would I ever want someone like that in my life? What would be the purpose of forgiving her??? But you can forgive your H? And yourself? Not poking fun at your pain, but do understand that karma does work in a full circle. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 Of course all situations are different but they all began with the same reality. SOMEONE WAS MARRIED. No gray there. It is a legal and oftentimes religious agreement between two people not THREE. One of these is not like the other. One does NOT belong. religion alright again everyone is different in that area... this post has taken a hostile turn... I don't care for... just to prove a point not helping anyone... Link to post Share on other sites
KnowHowLoveFeels Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 Of course all situations are different but they all began with the same reality. SOMEONE WAS MARRIED. No gray there. It is a legal and oftentimes religious agreement between two people not THREE. One of these is not like the other. One does NOT belong. Your H obviously missed the memo.... He's married, for god's sake! Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 religion alright again everyone is different in that area... this post has taken a hostile turn... I don't care for... just to prove a point not helping anyone... and who turned it hostile? Link to post Share on other sites
Author noforgiveness Posted November 26, 2006 Author Share Posted November 26, 2006 Your H obviously missed the memo.... He's married, for god's sake! ah yes yes he is wonderfully so. Link to post Share on other sites
pricillia Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 religion alright again everyone is different in that area... sometimes religion gets in the way... it causes un justified judement among other things, just because you are religious does not mean you are kind and caring... as far as the legality of marriage, it is true it is a piece of paper.. love caring sentiment and devotion is what is important. not every situation is the same... this post has taken a hostile turn... I don't care for... just to prove a point not helping anyone.. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 You're one of the few OW who has her head screwed on right. It all comes down to self respect and dignity. Thank you for the compliment. Every OW on this forum is in different stages of healing. And it is my hope that every woman here (the BS and OW) would come out of these situations wiser and stronger. But, unfortunately, it took alot of stumbling and falling for me to finally pull myself up and run away from him. Unfortunately, it takes alot of pain to get to that point of clarity and healing. I, for one, suffered immensely at my MM's hand. Do I blame him for what he has done? Absolutely. He knew he was married. I didn't. And, he will answer for that someday. Had he been honest with me at the beginning, I would not be here today. But, I am stronger and wiser for it. Regrets? Many. But at least I can take some wisdom out of the whole mess. And I won't be so trusting with the next one that comes along. My MM took that away from me. My innocence is gone. It is just so sad that the destruction is so deep for us all. It truly saddens me. In this most blessed season that we are entering, I wish for peace for all of us.... I think we ALL deserve it. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 Of course all situations are different but they all began with the same reality. SOMEONE WAS MARRIED. No gray there. It is a legal and oftentimes religious agreement between two people not THREE. One of these is not like the other. One does NOT belong. Exactly. Although for me, if I had known that he was going hunting, I would have been out in a flash. Life's too short to waste on liars. Link to post Share on other sites
Freedom Now Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 Life's too short to waste on liars. My sentiments exactly..... Link to post Share on other sites
owcanbhppy Posted November 26, 2006 Share Posted November 26, 2006 from a couple of pages ago, must be love, i believe you. i know mm & i are physically exclusive. ive left a hickey 'there'. it started as kidding around. he was laughing & egging me on, so... finish i did. nothing that could be explained away as a bruise. that was over a year ago. not a peep from you know who. Link to post Share on other sites
justice Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 I wouldn't be so smug in thinking that his wife didn't know about the actual physical side of your relationship. I knew long before I found out from my H. A WIFE does know. Don't kid yourself on that. Link to post Share on other sites
pureinheart Posted November 27, 2006 Share Posted November 27, 2006 Quote by Justice...."words of wisdom": I thought I'd met my knight in shining armor, I was wrong, he was only a loser in aluminum foil. That is excellent Justice!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 Of course all situations are different but they all began with the same reality. SOMEONE WAS MARRIED. No gray there. It is a legal and oftentimes religious agreement between two people not THREE. One of these is not like the other. One does NOT belong. Right, One does NOT belong. Oftentimes, it's the W. You DO realize that, don't you? You're story is goofy, I'm sorry. You went on vacation, leaving him free to see the hot blonde while you were gone? You and your friends are all going to keep a closer eye on "your" men now, you've said. Yeah, go on VACATION, that's great. Leave them all home, where the hot blonde is. Then, where your "perfect" marriages break up, you'll wonder why. DUH! Link to post Share on other sites
justice Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 Hey Thanks... http://www.glitter-graphics.com Link to post Share on other sites
ByMyRules Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 I wouldn't be so smug in thinking that his wife didn't know about the actual physical side of your relationship. I knew long before I found out from my H. A WIFE does know. Don't kid yourself on that. Not all wives know. My man's wife had no clue! Link to post Share on other sites
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