eddpad Posted November 23, 2006 Share Posted November 23, 2006 I am friends with this girl and we have an amazing connection. We have a GREAT time everywhere we go, and we always just have anything to talk about each other. We can't go out with each other because she is my friend's ex and we wouldn't want to do something like that to him. We knew that one day this thing we have going on woul end since eventually one of us would jump ship and be with someone else just to be in a secure and accepted relationship. A couple of days ago she said she found some guy cute and interesting. She said they met and hit it off, but the thing is he's married so I kno nothing will happen. I feel kinda intimidated by him because they have so much in common.)he goes to grad shool; she wants to go to grad school. he's an english/philosophy major; she is too. etc. etc.) I guess it's just a really ****ed up situation because naturally you don't really want to hear the girl you like alot talk about some other guy, even if she does tell me that it's just a crush and won't add up to anything. I just can't shake it for some reason. Does anyon have advise on how to get past this wall? I feel like Holden from Chasing Amy, and I really don't want to end like the movie. Link to post Share on other sites
aeren944 Posted November 24, 2006 Share Posted November 24, 2006 Well, you say that you both know that what you have is going to end. It seems like you both have accepted that fact, I guess. In accepting that, it seems like you're just going to have to deal with this new guy. The thing about not making a relationship "official" is that you don't really have any basis to act on your jealousy. It seems to me like you have 2 options here. First, you just have to deal with the jealousy, since you're not in an "official" relationship and she's free to choose to be with this guy. Second, you bite the bullet and make the relationship "official". You step up and claim the girl for your own. Then you've got something more solid than you have now, and you'd be able to act on that jealousy. Depending on how you want to handle it, you either need to just get over her and let her go, or you take on something more than you have now. That seems like a tough situation for sure... which is why I'd say you need to take a definate stand either way. Link to post Share on other sites
Firefox Posted November 24, 2006 Share Posted November 24, 2006 I agree with AeRan, Move it or loose it. Since you might feel like you might mess things up with your friend because the girl you like is his ex, talk to him about it and let him know that you really care about her and that you mean no harm to him. It's your way or the highway. Link to post Share on other sites
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