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Why do people stay with cheaters?


bobby dygytul

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bobby dygytul

I have a best friend that has been dating this girl for 9 years. Well she cheats on him constantly. She lies to him all the time. for example, she told him last week that she was going out of town for a few days to visit her dad, when in fact, she didn't. she didn't even tell him what she done instead.

 

I know 100% fact she cheats on him. Me and him even caught her kissing a guy out in the parking lot of a bar one time when she was suppose to be at work. A have had several friends tell me that they seen her out with other guys.

 

She dumps him every few months, and ends up going back to him. I sometimes think its because she doesn't have much, and he owns his own house, has a nice job and alot going for him. But when she does go back to him, she never changes.

 

The sad thing is, my friend is sooo in love with her, he always takes her back. She treats him so much like sh*t and hurts his feelings constantly. But he says he's soo in love with her that he cant help but to take her back.

 

I cant understand why some people put themselves through this. I cant really tell him anything, it does no good.

 

Does anyone have any opinions on this?

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People put up with that sort of thing because their families of origin were abusive and they were treated poorly and abused as children. They have a very low self esteem and don't feel they deserve more.

 

Many are addicted to the feelings of love, like the strong drug that it is, and want to feel that regardless of the cost. Believe it or not, there are those who come from highly dysfunctional families who actually feel very normal when they are hurt or depressed about love situations.

 

It's very sick, the girl will have ZERO respect for him, she will continue to dump all over him and take advantage of him, she will always think of him as a stupid fool and get all she can from him...until one she falls madly in love with someone else and never calls him or sees him again. Then he will be even more depressed but his low self esteem will make him feel deserving of those bad feelings.

 

Hopefully, one day he will wake up and get some gonads...some power in his life...start thinking better of himself...and go find quality love.

 

Meantime, don't worry about why others behave the way they do. Worry about yourself and put your energy towards making your own life the very best possible. Let everybody else work out their destiny in their own way and in their own time.

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