Jack9 Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 basically, i am in love with my best friend. it's been this way for a little over a year now and just recently i decided that things are pretty hopeless. i met her because she was going out with one of my buddies and then they broke up about a year and a half ago. soon after that is when i started to like her as more than just a friend. i was too afraid to tell her that i wanted to be more than just her friend so i just never did. then one night i went to my bud's frat party with her and we stayed overnight. i thought she was starting to get over him but then when they thought i was asleep they had sex. obviously, this was a very traumatizing experience for me. a week or two later i told her that i wanted to ask her out but i didn't because i knew that she wasnt over her ex yet. i really didn't want to tell her that but i pretty much had to (long story, not really relevant). we didn't mention anything about that night, tho, so im not sure if she knows that i was awake. since then i have still had problems getting over her and i was hoping that maybe when she heals from that relationship i'll be able to ask her out. then the other day i was at a different frat party with her and i was really excited to spend the night dancing with her and stuff, until i realized that she had no interest in me even being there because she was trying to get with some random guy there that she met a few weeks ago. i got her to dance with me for like 20 seconds then she goes and starts dancing with the other guy and she looked very interested in him. this made me very upset as well and she noticed so we talked about it the next day. i told her i still haven't been able to get rid of my feelings for her as more than just a friend and that i've been trying to but it's hard. whenever i've had any kind of problem with something like this, i went to her for help. except i feel that with this situation, it might not be a good idea to talk about it with her. all she knows is that i like her as more than a friend but she doesnt know that im really in love with her. i really think she is the most amazing girl i have ever seen. everything about her body is perfect and i really enjoy hanging out with her. should i tell her how much she really means to me or should i just try to act as though i don't have any further feelings for her? i dont think theres a good chance that she would go out with me, but i don't really have anyone else to talk to about this. im worried that if i tell her im in love with her and/or try to ask her for help it might hurt our friendship, which is extremely important to me. what should i do? any help is greatly appreciated. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted December 7, 2006 Share Posted December 7, 2006 If she wanted to date you, if she were interested in you, she's had plenty of opportunity to tell you or let you know. You've bared enough of your feelings to her that she's well aware that you want a relationship with her, and her response has been to go after other guys. You wouldn't be on LS asking advice if she were into you. So NO, don't go to her asking for advice. NO, don't go and tell her you're in love with her. Instead, don't spend as much time with her, and certainly don't spend time chasing her. Step back a little (or a LOT), in order to gain control of your feelings, because your friendship will suffer if you try to stay close while you feel this way about her. Start dating other people. You are going to parties, etc. - don't blow your chances of being with a woman who cares about you because you're carrying a torch for your friend. Link to post Share on other sites
ashlei171 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 I say... as long as your buddy is cool with the whole thing... BROS B4 H@3S .. then shes fair game.... ARE you kidding me... no way do not tell this girl how you feel.... you can continue to have these feelings but dont tell her.... You should play the game... don't call her... show up at a party (that you know she'll be at) with another girl.. a hot girl!!! and dance on her like she did to you... If this girl has any true feelings for you, like you have for her, she will realize it when she sees you with someone else... If she sees you and it has no effect on her at all and she continue to act the same to you like your still bFFs... then i'd say move on.... Link to post Share on other sites
phyrespryte Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Don't play the game and don't fool around with some poor girl's heart just to make her jealous. That's cruel. If I were you, I'd avoid this girl like she was some sort of crazy stalker. And stop idolizing her. She's not that hot and she's not that great. Link to post Share on other sites
ashlei171 Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 It is cruel to play with her heart... if you knew that she was interested and had feelings for you.... But, we don't know if she does... is it okay for her to freak dance on some other dudes??? How much does she like him then??? Its not easy to just say goodbye to a person that you love.. If it were going to break her heart she wouldnt of done it to him... its just an experiment to see if her "true" feelings will come out.... Link to post Share on other sites
phyrespryte Posted December 8, 2006 Share Posted December 8, 2006 Oh I don't give a crap about the girl he's interested in. I feel no sympathy for her. I'm talking about the hot girl that was suggested for him to bring to the party and grind on. Link to post Share on other sites
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