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2nd baby after a preemie? Family says no!


friskywife

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With the first baby, we both almost died. I understand that my family is scared that the same thing will happen, but now the doctors would know what to look for and could monitor. There's a 30% chance it could happen again, but that's a 70% chance it won't. I just can't say to myself, you will never have another. It seems so final.

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I also had a high risk pregnancy. The conditions of the pregnancy would determine whether I'd do it again. High risk doesn't necessarily mean you can't have anymore. What does your doctor say?

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discuss this in detail with your doctor – your concerns, what your body is capable of handling, etc – and talk to your husband. Otherwise, it's really not anyone else's concern. Many women give birth prematurely and go on to carry subsequent children full-term. Really, the only thing that might throw a monkey wrench in your hopes is if your body isn't designed to allow you to go full-term with a pregnancy. Again, that's an issue you need to raise with your doctor.

 

in the meantime, if your loving family starts worrying, tell them to pray or wish you positive thoughts as you attempt another pregnancy. After all, each birth differs, any mommy can tell you that!

 

good luck, and keep us posted about the big event :)

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IfWishesWereHorses

Here is my story. My daughter, first child, was a completely normal pregnancy. I got pregnant again when she was 5 months old. I was a week past due and started showing signs of preeclampsia. The night that was discovered I had a complete abruption and almost died twice on the operating table. I lost my son. 6 months later I was pregnant again and was told that there was no reason to worry and was treated as a high risk pregnancy. Five days before my scheduled cesarean I didn't feel the baby kick in the morning and rushed to the doctor. My next son had died. For years I was so bothered that I could not give my daughter a sibling. I felt incredible greif over that fact but as she was older I didn't want to put her or my family through that gut wrenching ordeal again. My husband also said no. 9 years after my first child I almost fainted when I found out I was pregnant again! Everyone was a wreck. Some people advised me even to take care of it, though I could have never done that! 9 years later I have the most adorable 9 year old son that ever walked the face of the earth, I would have never chosen to try it again... I call him my little miracle (except when he's being really really bad!)

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Thanks for the replies! I researched yesterday that there is a series of tests that can be done to see if it could possibly happen again. I have to go to my OB soon, so I think I will talk to her about those tests. I believe I will need to go to a perinatoligist (sp?) should I decide to do this.

 

Wishes-you have an amazing story, I'm glad that things worked out for you (and your family) in the end. Thank you for sharing.

 

My best friend just found out she is preggers and I guess it just has been on my mind lately.

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goodfriendeva

what happened with you guys? if you dont mind me asking..

 

 

i had a preemie as well.. and as of right now im terrified of it happening again so babies are out of the question right now..

 

my mom and other family members say for us to adopt or not to have anymore.. but its really non of there concern.. yes they love us and not want us to go through the same ordeal.. but how much happiness that baby bring once its here is so much more...

 

all in all its your decision and if your doctor doesnt see a big problem with it and not concerned then go for it.

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I had HELLP syndrome, placental abruption and toximia. It happened so fast. I had just been at the doctor's on Friday for my gestational diabities test (which I had failed) and Sunday @ 4:30 I just started bleeding. We went straight to the hospital (side note: on the way in some inconsiderate b***h said something about me having a miscarriage right in front of me). The put me on magnisium sulfate & steriods to try to prolong things, but the tests came back that I had HELLP, my liver was shutting down and the placenta had come off 1/3 of the way. Emergency C-section and he was out at 7:25.

 

My DS is just like any other 3 year old now. Sometimes I can't believe that this happened, but we have pictures and memories (well, I don't remember much of the delivery or the day after) to prove that it did. He still has little scars were he had so many IVs.

 

I have to go for my yearly in the next couple of months and was going to get some more information out of her about the tests that can be done.

 

eva-my mom has said the same thing about adoption, DH was adopted, there is nothing wrong with it, but if I could have another of my own...maybe it would go right this time. What about you, will you tell me about your little miracle?

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goodfriendeva

oh wow.. sorry that had happen to you guys.. but the worse is over.. and god was def watching over you guys.. i agree if i couldnt have anymore children adoption would be the possiblity for me.

 

def talk with your doctor about this and see what he recommends. youll probably just be considered high risk and put on bedrest but its DEF worth it..

 

as for me.. i was pregnant for about 3months in and i was rushed in to the ER for vaginal bleeding.. they ran tests on me adn the baby was fine.. they couldnt figure out why i was bleeding though. so i was sent home and told no sex blah blah lol

 

 

2 months later on feb14 this year.. i went to get my sonogram to see the sex of my baby where they discovered my cervix was shortening(opening) so my orignal dr sent me to a specialist for high risk.. that day i was sent into the hospital and stayed for a week running all test to see if something was wrong with the baby. thankfully nothing was wrong and then they put a cerclase in me and put on bedrest.

 

3months later my cerclase came out(it was suppose to though i had a disolvable stitch) drs told me not to worry about it.. about a week later i went to the ER again for bleeding.. they put me on a contraction machine i wasnt contracting.. NOR did the nurse check my vagina to see if i was dialated.. i stayed there for an hr and was discharged.. a few hrs later passed and i called my dr promtly at 8 they told me to come in where the checked me out and rushed me to the hospital.. i was dialated 8cm!!! and had no pain what so ever!! i had an emergency c section may 19th. he stayed at the hospital for a lil over 2months..

 

oh he was 2 months preemie.. and you wouldnt be able to tell now.

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