"How Feminism Destroyed Real Men"

[Pyro]

Anyone who believes that it is acceptable to abuse someone of the opposite sex is lower than scum and shouldn't be allowed to interact with anyone of the opposite sex.

 

Just my 2 cents.

[bab]

hmm...aren't those the tactics that whites used to keep negroes under their thumb for hundreds of years in the US??

 

So, now I should equate you with slave owners? If that's what you want...

 

 

Did anyone else notice that her article was printed 2 days later and she says that she doesn't know if he's had an affair? Seems kind of odd that he says she kicked him out over an affair and she says she doesn't know if he's had one. Something smells fishy to me.

[a4a]

So, now I should equate you with slave owners? If that's what you want...

 

 

Did anyone else notice that her article was printed 2 days later and she says that she doesn't know if he's had an affair? Seems kind of odd that he says she kicked him out over an affair and she says she doesn't know if he's had one. Something smells fishy to me.

 

Yeah I bet his weener smells fishy ...... whole things sounds like they were trying to make a buck by exhibiting some sort of Springer episode.

[blind_otter]

Now here's a glimpse of what it's like to be married to the guy who wrote the previous article.. (written by his wife, Liz Jones)

 

http://books.guardian.co.uk/departments/biography/story/0,6000,1543533,00.html

 

How did I know they were miserable? I must be a fortune teller. God, that article put me off marriage altogether, yet again.

[blind_otter]

This is why these articles usually fall flat. He makes good points but then he starts bringing up cheating which makes him sound like a neanderthal. If his wife is really that much of a nag why doesn't he just divorce her? I would love to see more men start filing for divorces instead of being trapped in marriages to nagging shrews. If a man does choose to marry he needs to design a prenup with an escape plan in case she does turn into a shrew. Feminists are playing ches while guys like the one thast wrote the article are playing checkers.

 

Why don't you read the article his wife wrote, then, Mr. know it all?

[EnigmaXOXO]

Despite the many problems my wife and I have endured, we have both come a long way since we first met six years ago.

We have challenged one another to grow - professionally, intellectually, emotionally and spiritually. This would never have happened had she flaked out and gone for a softer option in her choice of partner.

 

Interesting quote from the author of the 'anti-feminism' editoral. I doubt he would have also been "challenged to grow" if he found himself with the more traditional subservient type of women instead of his equal.

 

Reads to me like his resentment is a little displaced, though. He seems more squeamish when it comes to 'weak men' rather than strong women … but is blaming the women's movement in general for the castration of his entire gender.

 

Perhaps all the groaning is just a symptom of his own "growing pains" … Or he's just trying too hard to deny the fact that good woman has finally managed to clip his tail feathers, too.

[norajane]

So, now I should equate you with slave owners? If that's what you want...

 

 

Did anyone else notice that her article was printed 2 days later and she says that she doesn't know if he's had an affair? Seems kind of odd that he says she kicked him out over an affair and she says she doesn't know if he's had one. Something smells fishy to me.

 

Actually, the article are written a year apart - first hers and then his. So his affair was discovered at some point betwee Aug 2005 (her article) and Aug 2006 (his article).

 

Three years of marriage and he's cheating?

[Woggle]

Why don't you read the article his wife wrote, then, Mr. know it all?

 

It proves my point. He beats his chest but in the end his wife does not respect him. If a man is a real man his wife or girlfriend will respect him and if she can't learn to respect him she will be out of his life. By respect I don't mean submission or some 1950s type of thing but the type of respect that makes her want to be a partner instead of an adversary. This man treats his wife as an adversary and she is still in his life so he lost right before he even started.

[blind_otter]

It proves my point. He beats his chest but in the end his wife does not respect him. If a man is a real man his wife or girlfriend will respect him and if she can't learn to respect him she will be out of his life. By respect I don't mean submission or some 1950s type of thing but the type of respect that makes her want to be a partner instead of an adversary. This man treats his wife as an adversary and she is still in his life so he lost right before he even started.

 

Well that was actually a well thought out response. You always surprise me, woggle. That's a good thing, though. I hope things are going well for you.

[bab]

Are you denying that guys like that don't exist?

 

In my happy place they don't!

 

Obviously they do, hence domestic violence and rape. I just can't see how a man with have a brain would think that those type of things were okay. I think that a man of the mindset that women should stay in the home is still a far cry from a man who thinks women should be raped and beaten.

[SmoochieFace]

In my happy place they don't!

 

Obviously they do, hence domestic violence and rape. I just can't see how a man with have a brain would think that those type of things were okay. I think that a man of the mindset that women should stay in the home is still a far cry from a man who thinks women should be raped and beaten.

 

It doesn't have anything to do with 'intelligence' - it has much more to do with how a person is raised and their cultural environment. Some cultures still condone complete male dominance over females - yes, even in this so-called 'enlightened age'. And, as we know, the USA is full of people from many diverse cultural backgrounds so it should not come as any surprise that this 'macho' thing is alive and well here.

 

Not justifying any type of abusive behaviour whatsoever, btw...

[alphamale]

Anyone who believes that it is acceptable to abuse someone of the opposite sex is lower than scum and shouldn't be allowed to interact with anyone of the opposite sex. Just my 2 cents.

so by your logic RIDDDLER then whites who totally abused blacks (and other minorities) for hundreds of years should not be allowed to interact with non-whites. Is this what you're saying?

 

Abuse is not just a sexual thing, its racial also.

[Pyro]

so by your logic RIDDDLER then whites who totally abused blacks (and other minorities) for hundreds of years should not be allowed to interact with non-whites. Is this what you're saying?

 

Abuse is not just a sexual thing, its racial also.

 

I was referring to guys who abuse gals, or vice versa, in terms of relationships.

 

To answer your question, I do think that any abuser should be locked up and separated from the rest of society, where they will either rot away or make an attempt to better themselves, whichever choice they prefer.

[SmoochieFace]

so by your logic RIDDDLER then whites who totally abused blacks (and other minorities) for hundreds of years should not be allowed to interact with non-whites. Is this what you're saying?

 

Abuse is not just a sexual thing, its racial also.

 

Oh, I get it - you are somehow 'justifying' sexual abuse but you're against racial abuse?

 

How about not justifying abuse PERIOD?

[My Fair Katie]

I'm just glad neither my husband or I are syndicated columnists.

 

Both of their articles were sorta embarrassing to read. His wife emasculates him in her column and he basically throws an "I'm the real boss" temper tantrum in response in his own.

 

Weak.

 

Though their sex does sound fun.

[alphamale]

Though their sex does sound fun.

I would tend to agree MFK

[Rooster_DAR]

I thought the article was for the most part very good, and yes I disagree with the cheating part as well. I also think that men have become too wimpy these days (I will admit I have been there), and allowed women to run all over them because of the loss of spine. However, I still see lot's of alpha men and men who are truly men get the short end of the stick from women as well.

 

I have talked to many women in relationships of both types of men wimpy and manly, and they complained that either the guy was too wimpy, or he was not sensitive enough. Kind of a lose lose situation (women who don't know what they want again). The only real difference I see here is that men who are of the "Alpha" type typically snair more women, and for longer periods of time than wimpy guys. In the end, it seems to me that you have to shoot for somewhere in between, and go for the balanced male who is a true man in the sense (likes sports, beer, motorcycles..etc..) but yet have just enought sensitivity one in a while to keep the relationship in check and satisfy at least some emotional needs of the woman.

 

So we as men need to do the following (partial list):

• Stand up to our women when we know were right
  
• Be man enough to know when were wrong, acknowlege it but don't cry about it
  
• Be able to read all the female emotions/wants like a roadmap (biggest challenge)
  
• Pull our own as far as money goes
  
• Deliver sensitivity at the appropriate times (another challenge)
  
• Be careful how much sensitivity you show (Don't cry when you watch "Fried Green Tomatoes" when you watching it with your G/F)
  
• Take care of business in the bedroom (We need to make sure she comes first)
  
• Don't treat her too much like a princess, but instead deliver mild doses of affection (This is a big one)

I'm sure this list could go on. This list can become challenging for men, because most men I know have a very difficult time figuring out women in general. And the statement I hear often from guys "Women say one thing and mean another" seems to hold some weight, at least from the male perspective.

 

Cheers!

[Rooster_DAR]

One more thing that I learned from my recent breakup.

 

When a woman gets you to believing that "Ain't noone happy unless mama's happy" or "The woman is always right" then that's a big problem. I never personally had that mindset up until my last relationship, so I went along with this idea that she suggested (and many male counterparts suggested) and where did it leave me, I think most of us know that.

 

Cheers!

[Aloros]

So we as men need to do the following (partial list):

• Stand up to our women when we know were right
  
• Be man enough to know when were wrong, acknowlege it but don't cry about it
  
• Be able to read all the female emotions/wants like a roadmap (biggest challenge)
  
• Pull our own as far as money goes
  
• Deliver sensitivity at the appropriate times (another challenge)
  
• Be careful how much sensitivity you show (Don't cry when you watch "Fried Green Tomatoes" when you watching it with your G/F)
  
• Take care of business in the bedroom (We need to make sure she comes first)
  
• Don't treat her too much like a princess, but instead deliver mild doses of affection (This is a big one)

 

I would respectfully disagree with a couple items on your list - being careful how much sensitivity you show and don't treat her too much like a princess. How about just being yourself so you'll find someone who loves you for who you are?

 

And personally, I LOVE being treated like a princess. Being treated well makes me want to reciprocate. Why only mild doses of affection? My boyfriend is very affectionate, and is constantly doing things that show me that he cares and is thinking of me. Because he's so good to me, I'm always thinking of new ways to be kind to him - making him his favorite food when he's had a rough day at work, getting his friends together for a surprise bday bash, and little things like massages, picking up things I notice he's missing or running out of, cheesecake, etc. He tells me I'm so good to him, but the only reason I am is because he is so good to me.

 

Being a sweet guy to your girl doesn't mean being a pushover. I love that my guy stands up for himself, and I always know if someone badmouths me in his presence, he'd defend me.

 

Ideally, to me anyways, a relationship isn't about rules, it's about a partnership. It's about two people who understand one another (truly!) and have one another's backs, no matter what.

 

How could you ever expect to live the rest of your life with someone while playing by "rules" and not acting as you truly are?

[norajane]

I would respectfully disagree with a couple items on your list - being careful how much sensitivity you show and don't treat her too much like a princess. How about just being yourself so you'll find someone who loves you for who you are?

 

And personally, I LOVE being treated like a princess. Being treated well makes me want to reciprocate. Why only mild doses of affection? My boyfriend is very affectionate, and is constantly doing things that show me that he cares and is thinking of me. Because he's so good to me, I'm always thinking of new ways to be kind to him - making him his favorite food when he's had a rough day at work, getting his friends together for a surprise bday bash, and little things like massages, picking up things I notice he's missing or running out of, cheesecake, etc. He tells me I'm so good to him, but the only reason I am is because he is so good to me.

 

Being a sweet guy to your girl doesn't mean being a pushover. I love that my guy stands up for himself, and I always know if someone badmouths me in his presence, he'd defend me.

 

Ideally, to me anyways, a relationship isn't about rules, it's about a partnership. It's about two people who understand one another (truly!) and have one another's backs, no matter what.

 

How could you ever expect to live the rest of your life with someone while playing by "rules" and not acting as you truly are?

 

Well said!

 

That's exactly how I feel about it too.

[Rooster_DAR]

I would respectfully disagree with a couple items on your list - being careful how much sensitivity you show and don't treat her too much like a princess. How about just being yourself so you'll find someone who loves you for who you are?

 

And personally, I LOVE being treated like a princess. Being treated well makes me want to reciprocate. Why only mild doses of affection? My boyfriend is very affectionate, and is constantly doing things that show me that he cares and is thinking of me. Because he's so good to me, I'm always thinking of new ways to be kind to him - making him his favorite food when he's had a rough day at work, getting his friends together for a surprise bday bash, and little things like massages, picking up things I notice he's missing or running out of, cheesecake, etc. He tells me I'm so good to him, but the only reason I am is because he is so good to me.

 

Being a sweet guy to your girl doesn't mean being a pushover. I love that my guy stands up for himself, and I always know if someone badmouths me in his presence, he'd defend me.

 

Ideally, to me anyways, a relationship isn't about rules, it's about a partnership. It's about two people who understand one another (truly!) and have one another's backs, no matter what.

 

How could you ever expect to live the rest of your life with someone while playing by "rules" and not acting as you truly are?

 

Well perhaps your guy is a sweet guy and still a manly man, I was referring more to pushovers who don't stand up for themselves and yet are too affectionate on more of the lines of clingy or needy.

 

Sounds like you have a good man.

 

Cheers!

[amerikajin]

I have not read all of the replies, but the article is saying stuff that alphamale and I have been saying for a long time now: women want real men.

 

What is being a real man?

 

It's definitely not hitting women, but at the same time it's definitely not taking any crap from them.

 

When I look back at it now, my ex-fiance, whom I met fresh out of a separation from her ex-husband, was basically a feminist. She was a so-called 'strong woman'. She had to have the last word. She had to dominate her male counterparts - it meant a lot to her to do that. She always talked about how women were oppressed or treated unfairly.

 

By all accounts, her ex-husband was a nice guy and a good father. He didn't mistreat her although she said he did have a temper that increasingly became apparent in the final days of their marriage. But if I were to hazard a guess, I would say it's because he got so frustrated knowing there was no possible way he could win with this chick...nothing was good enough for her, she wasn't "her match" anymore. She even later complained that he was a doormat and that he just agreed with everything she said or did and that she felt like she didn't have "an equal partner". I tried living with her myself, and it took me only six months of living with her to realize this shyte wasn't going to work out. She was uncompromising - the argument would not end until she was proven right. That's the very definition of a feminist, the new breed of modern women we've been working so hard to create over the last few decades. Somehow a woman's right to escape from marriage hell (abuse and complete neglect) evolved into a movement to dominate men (among many woman, though certainly not all). I was too young and inexperienced at the time to understand how to handle someone like this. My reactions poisoned the situation further because I lost control of myself. I wouldn't do that now.

 

Then again, I wouldn't date a woman who felt like she had something to prove to me. I certainly have no problem with a woman having her say and expressing her opinions - that's cool. But a woman who needs to be equal or superior to men, a woman with an over-sized ego, a woman who has to go through life trying to prove that she's equal to men, is a woman I'm definitely not interested in. I can recognize the warning signs early and I just don't even bother with it anymore. Yeah, I'm jaded...but that's not always a bad thing.

[BareGoddess]

I would respectfully disagree with a couple items on your list - being careful how much sensitivity you show and don't treat her too much like a princess. How about just being yourself so you'll find someone who loves you for who you are?

 

And personally, I LOVE being treated like a princess. Being treated well makes me want to reciprocate. Why only mild doses of affection? My boyfriend is very affectionate, and is constantly doing things that show me that he cares and is thinking of me. Because he's so good to me, I'm always thinking of new ways to be kind to him - making him his favorite food when he's had a rough day at work, getting his friends together for a surprise bday bash, and little things like massages, picking up things I notice he's missing or running out of, cheesecake, etc. He tells me I'm so good to him, but the only reason I am is because he is so good to me.

 

Being a sweet guy to your girl doesn't mean being a pushover. I love that my guy stands up for himself, and I always know if someone badmouths me in his presence, he'd defend me.

 

Ideally, to me anyways, a relationship isn't about rules, it's about a partnership. It's about two people who understand one another (truly!) and have one another's backs, no matter what.

 

How could you ever expect to live the rest of your life with someone while playing by "rules" and not acting as you truly are?

 

I was going to respond after reading Rooster's last posts, but there's no need for me to. You said it all! Well done!

[alphamale]

I have not read all of the replies, but the article is saying stuff that alphamale and I have been saying for a long time now: women want real men.

agreed!!

 

What is being a real man?

 

It's definitely not hitting women, but at the same time it's definitely not taking any crap from them.

sometimes physical violence can be justified....a man being put into jail for beating the snot out of his woman is a very recent occurrence.

 

men = violence, agression, war, conflict. these are all masculine traits.

[BareGoddess]

Well perhaps your guy is a sweet guy and still a manly man, I was referring more to pushovers who don't stand up for themselves and yet are too affectionate on more of the lines of clingy or needy.

 

Sounds like you have a good man.

 

Cheers!

 

Maybe you're missing the point though. There are women out there who like weaker men, women who actually PREFER those men. There are women who NEED clingy men in order for them to be happy.

 

I think the point is to just be who you really ARE and find someone who appreciates you for who you are, not for some pretend version.