Will she give me second chance?

[heartbroken1234]

My ex and I have been broken up for almost 7 months now. It has been a terrible, terrible 7 months. We have pretty much talked the whole time. There would be times we'd go a week or so w/ out talking and then she'd always be the one to initiate contact again. She does have a boyfriend now whom which she started dating 2 weeks after we broke up. Her boyfriend is 3.5 hours away which I find as a huge deal and big reason why she still comes to me. Lately though, things have became a lot different and she's been calling me more and more. We'll talk for hours upon hours on the phone. And in the past week, I've been at her Apartment prolly 4 nights or so. Where all we'll do is lay together and hold each other. We also got dinner, took walk for xmas light show, then got ice cream one night. Things seem so perfect when we're around each other and talking. Up until this past week when we'd see each other, she'd allow me to hug her, kiss her, hold her... This past week tho, we've layed together, she'd hold me back, we've kissed, and more.... Things just seem so great. She's even told me that she's mentioned to her boyfriend that things are different. I really felt as if this weekend she'd dump him to be with me, but turns out he came back wednesday night because his g'ma was put in the hospital. And on that particular night my ex called me crying like crazy saying how sorry she was that he'd be w/ her that night and stuff... While he was there, she still snuck me some texts and what not. I don't know what to think. I mean, she'll say things that make me think as if we'll be back together. And when I speak to her of marriage again, she gets very happy and agrees and says just to trust her. I don't know what to think or really do. Should I continue to just talk to her and be w/ her as much as possible? Or back off until she breaks up with him? (if she does at all...) Please send me some feedback ASAP, I'd appreciate it! This girl means the world to me, i mean, obviously I still love her more than ever this whole time even tho she's been w/ someone else for 7 months.

[bubbalump]

Hey,

 

Shes been with someone else. I think you should put yourself first. Look at the situation and step back. She gets you when she wants, but also the other guy when she wants too. Shes leading you around like a little dog, your on the back burner!

 

I bet your a great guy , but your getting used in my opinion. Stand up for yourself , say you wont take it, and let her figure things out . I think you should stop talking to her and concentrate on yourself. IMAGINE getting a girl who treated you like you treat her!!!

 

I think by talking to her constantly since the breakup, you havent gone through the steps in a break up! Give her some space, for her to figure out what she wants, but more importantly for yourself to grow!

 

Do you really want to talk to a woman about marriage when she has two men in her life?

[heartbroken1234]

Thanks for the response... I realize what you're saying completely... It's just hard. And the marriage talk isn't really deep convo, just lil quirks here and there, like stuff we had said prior to breaking up.

Anyways, I wish I could just stop and let her figure it out. But I feel like if I stop and just let it go, she'll go to him for attention and just become more attached to him again. I feel as if maybe if I keep talking to her and hanging out she'll realize how much more she wants me rather than him. I don't know, and I realize sex doesn't mean you love someone and want someone completely. But the past 2 times we've seen each other, its been very close.

I realize I should maybe back off, but at the same time, her boyfriend will be back for break in like 2 weeks or less, so I figure I'd just stay talking to her, loving her, and being around her until then. That way, she is forced to make a decision, either not see me at all and be with him, or dump him to be w/ me! Who knows!?!?!

[bubbalump]

I feel for you man.

 

My girl left me and after she left we tried to remain friends. We were in love, and it was too hard for me to remain friends with her. Its a time in our life when we are both figuring out where we are heading in life.

 

I also found out that she had feelings for her ex after we broke up! i was devesated, just that alone hurt like hell! So i told her , no hard feelings, i still loved her, but i cant fake a friendship. So i really feel for you, as you have to deal with the fact she has ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP!!!

 

I, like you wanted to be there for my ex, and yes i still deeply care for her and part of me hopes that shell come back to me. But in the end im glad i cut contact, im putting myself first , im allowing myself to grow as a man and realize that the world doesnt revolve around my ex.

 

Now i cant tell you what to do , i can just tell you what i did , and how much FREAKIN happier i am for doing so. Tell her you love her, you want to be with her, but you arent going to do this to yourself anymore. You gave her all you could, and if that isnt good enough, then so be it . AND WALK AWAY.

 

Maybe shell come back to you, maybe she wont...BUT youll be moving on with life and be a better person for it!

 

Good luck man.

[Rooster_DAR]

Most women these days are like monkeys, they won't let go of one branch until they have hold of another. This saying applies here, and holds it's weight in truth.

 

The reason she is coming back to you is that she is having problems with her new partner, I have been through this recently as well. Givin the chance to choose between you, they will usually choose the new person. Sad but true.

 

Good luck!