Is it the past?

[witsend]

I love my husband very much and I don't want to lose him. His past has not been good. But he has changed and he is a great father and husband. How can I move on and forget the past. Not get so freakin jealous and try to control him. Is it possible for me?

[whichwayisup]

You said it in your own post - He has changed and is a great father and husband...Focus on that!! What counts is how he is now, with you and your children.

 

The past is the past, so try to leave it there.

 

If you feel you can't get past some issues, whether it be trust/jealously of things/people from his past, you may want to go talk to a counsellor to help you deal with it better.

 

Has he given you any real reasons to mistrust him or make you feel jealous? Or is it just stuff you have no control over? Because if it's control, only you can control yourself and you have to trust him enough not to betray you.

[Madeamistake]

I have to agree with Whichwayisup!

 

People change and sometimes for the better! Look, if he is great now - how much better do you expect him to be?

 

One thing I will tell you is that there is only one Jesus therefore no one on this earth is perfect!

 

He loves you! Just remember that!

 

[Trialbyfire]

If the past happened with you as one of the people involved, I can understand why it's difficult to let go of it. If you really want to make a go of this, you have to be prepared to fully forgive (but only a fool would forget). You know what you have to do when those feelings of distrust surface. You also know that you have two clear choices at that moment. Let them dominate you or move on. You decide.

 

If the past happened before you came into the picture, you have to expect that both of you had relationships previously. You're doing yourself no good by hanging onto a past that had nothing to do with you. If nothing else, keep thinking about your children and the impact on them when you create a negative atmosphere for them.