JaimeLynn1980 Posted July 6, 2002 Share Posted July 6, 2002 Okay I have a queston. There is this guy Paul, that I like, & the other night, I had gotten drunk, & messed around with him. I've always had this feeling that he kind of liked me, but I wasn't for sure. He's really shy, so he doesn't say much; & it's hard for him to start up a convo. Well, that night at the party, he was totally giving me all of the attention, he talked to me the whole night, & we ended up messing around, but no sex. Well, I was acting like a really annoying drunk that night, so I was embarassed to go to work the next day, (I work with him) Well, I thought that he wouldn't even look at me the next day or anything. (I thought that all he wanted from me was for us to mess around. We did a lot 'cept for sex.) Well, he says hi to me right as I enter work, & even comes over from all the way across the room to talk to me. (Which is a total task, being that he is so shy.) It was so cute, 'cause he was just as nervous as me, & that whole day, he acted as though he wanted to talk to me; but me being the shy one I am, won't talk to him unless he talks to me, & I only say hi to him when he says hi to me, & I don't look at him either. Well, he's a supervisor, & he'll ask me questions about the team, or he'll come over & ask me specific questions, but I just won't take the inititiave talk to him myself. Well, I heard that he didn't want a serious relationship with anyone; but I don't know. Well, I haven't been talking to him unless he talks to me, & when he says hi, I say hi. Because of this, the communication has died down a bit; & he isn't talking to me as much. Do you think he thinks I'm blowing him off? And does he appear as though he likes me? I don't want to throw out hints that I like him, not knowing if he likes me. Isn't it a good sign when the guy comes up to you after a night like that; wanting to talk to you & stuff? I don't know! I don't know if he shows that he likes me or not, or what. Please help! Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted July 6, 2002 Share Posted July 6, 2002 It's extremely obvious that the guy likes you but he's not going to keep coming around and opening his mouth if you're going to give him the silent treatment. You don't have to walk over to him every minute but be sure to initiate some kind words here and there. He sounds like a gentleman so you're going to have to respond to him in some way or he'll move on thinking you're not interested. In the first part of your conversation, you said he was shy and didn't say much...but it sounds like you're the shy one in this duo. If he is really shy yet keeps coming around to start conversations or greet you in some way, he's very interested. Give him some encouragement. Now, if you want something serious with the guy you're going to have to watch that drinking. Most men would probably feel that if they got you to the ten yard line once when you were drunk, they could probably score a touchdown at the next opportunity by giving you an extra drink or two. I'd say the best way to get a man and keep him interested is to play the ball for a long series of first downs. If you don't know anything about football, ask somebody who does. And start being a little friendly to this guy. Link to post Share on other sites
JaimeLynn1980 Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 Okay. I have a question, & it is driving me insane... Okay. There is this guy that I like IMMENSLEY, & he's really shy. Well, I ended up messing around with him at a party, (Not sleeping with him) & the next day, (I work with him) I thought that he would just be ignoring me, but he took all that was in him, to come up, & start a conversation. He was really nervous, you could tell; but he made all of this effort for a solid week; but the thing was, I'd only say hello to him when he'd do me, or talk to him when he did me, but I was very nice... I even had a hard time looking him in th eye, I'm so shy. Well, afterwards, he justbecame weird; where he won't even look me in the eye, or he turns really red when I'm talking to him, & acts really fidgitty. He doesn't make any effort with me, & I'l lcatch him looking at me, but he'll quickly look away. Well, he hadn't talked to me for the longest time; not even say hi, until today; when my friend & I ran into him at the mall, & he couldn't look me in the eye, but he kept blushing, but holding a conversation with me. Well, I go to work, & he comes up to where I am, & asks me how I am, & compliments me on my new hair cut; but he hs the hardest time looking me in the eye. Well, a mutual friend tells me that he thinks I'm pretty; but when I tell her that I like him ,she says that he's not looking for a serious relationship. Well, he acts as though he really likes me sometimes, but then he acts oblivious to me. He's really shy, but I just don't get at how he could go from trying to talk to me so much after that party; to getting so timid around me; but still managing to come up to complement me on my hair. Well, the question I have is, does the guy like me; or does he not? does he maybe think I'm shrugging him off? I want to ask him out, but don't know how to approach it... can someone please tell me what's going on here? He acts like he likes me, but he gets so paralyzed & red, when I'm around... I'm no better. I get the same way around him; I can't look him in the eye; & I freeze up...Help!!!! I really like the guy, & I don't know what to do... Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted July 17, 2002 Share Posted July 17, 2002 It's obvious that the two of you like each other and neither of you is giving the other much encouragement. One of you will have to take the lead and ask the other out to do something...have lunch, dinner, take a walk or something. Maybe the two of you can draw straws to see who will ask the other out. Maybe you have a mutual friend who is dating somebody. You can arrange for that person to invite the two of you individually along on some activity, party, movie, concert, event of any sort. They could let him know that you are coming along as well. That would put the two of you together and neither of you would have to ask the other out. Then you could take it from there. If you don't have the courage to initiate an definitive date situation, just write him off and go about your business. Shyness is cute in one person but when both people are shy to a fault, I just don't see how that could ever work...until one or the other grows out of it. Shyness comes out of insecurity and self esteem issues. Regardless of your dealings with this guy, you need to work on getting over this problem. It gets you nowhere in life except for people thinking it's cute...for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
velvet Posted July 18, 2002 Share Posted July 18, 2002 Nothing comes out of being shy. Like Tony said you may end up loosing an opportunity here. Maybe what you could try doing is invite him to lunch, and let him know that your not trying to come across as too quiet but that your EXTremely shy. Get him to understand that now if you suspect its affecting the chemistry. Your shyness with words will get better as you get to know each other more. Just let him know where you stand with him Link to post Share on other sites
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