unmotivated partner- ADVICE APPRECIATED

[fluffy0]

Allright, I'll start at the beginning and try to make it short.

 

My boyfriend moved across the country to be with me because I was in college and if I transferred I would have to retake basically everything because the requirements here are very different from other places. This was last spring. He was very worried about finding a job once he moved here since he doesn't get financial help from his parents and also goes to colleg part time while paying for it himself.

 

So, he moves to where I am and miraculously finds a rather good paying job ( more than he earned back at his other job) in about a week. The first three or so months are great, he likes his job because he basically supervised the whole business and was happy to have lots of responsibility over others. Well about three months into the job things start getting bad. First, a co-worker he doesn't like says she saw him sleeping on the job, which he says he wasn't, but the owners don't believe him. Then, the owners basically started getting psycho on him and screaming at him everyday because he didn't do things to unrealistic specificications. At least thats his side of the story, how he described it to me. I don't think he is a slacker or anything, because he worked at his last job for a long itme and was liked by everyone there and got employee of the month and stuff.

 

He has a talk with the owners and things get better for a while but then they end up firing him. At first, he was kind of happy he wa fired because he hated that job so much. He gets a job in a drugstore the day he is fired, which doesn't pay much but at least its something and starts looking for a better job.

 

At first, he applies to a bunch of places but few call him back for an interview. But then, he just seemed to give up. He basically sends out one resume, waits for them to call him back, goes to the interview, and then waits and waits to get a callback. When he doesn't get anything or they finally call to say he wasn't hired he'll send out another one, or sulk until I convince him to send it. This amounts to about 1 resume sent per month. If you send out one resume per months you are never going to get hired for a decent paying job.

 

I'm getting really sick of this. I feel like I can't get mad at him for not finding another job because I don't have one. But I am in school and had to quit because I have six classes which are all over the day, and there are no jobs that will fit my schedule. But I am finishing school soon, and after that definately have a plan for what job to get and am volunteering to get experience in that. I feel like I am trying and he isn't. I really can't stand his whole argument of "well, you don't know how easy you have it, your parents help you out and pay for everything." Yes, my parents do help me, but I don't have it all easy and during the times that I was able to work, I applied to places relentlessly until I got a job. His excuse might work for now, but what about when I graduate and do get a job, which is what I am working toward.

All right, I admit it, I nag. But i love him and we are best friends and i could never imagine being with anyone else. I don't want his laziness to get in the way of our relationship, our future. Also, I have some inherited health problems which will make it very hard for me to have kids, so part of the reason why I am so worried about it is that I feel like if I don't have kids early, I'll never be able to. We both agree we want kids, but I don't think its fair that I am working hard toward being able to support a family and he isn't. I'm going to get a teaching certificate after college, so it's not like I'll be making a lot of money, and I expect my partner to contribute too. I wouldn't be upset if he tried, but it just seems like he isn't. I don't like to nag because I feel like a mother trying to make her teenage son do something. Sorry this post wasn't very brief after all, I just really needed to vent it all. Please respond for how to deal with this situation I would greatly appreciate any advice.