sweetsexylove Posted December 14, 2006 Share Posted December 14, 2006 my boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 5 months and he still talks to his ex girlfriend, i dont mind if they are friends but she doesnt know he has a new girlfriend. i have been in her shoes and it wasnt fair to me. i felt like my ex was keeping me on the side just n case his new girlfriend didn't work out. my boyfriend tells me he doesn't tell her because he doesn't want to hear he bitch -and she's crazy and its convenient. im being played huh? Link to post Share on other sites
climbergirl Posted December 14, 2006 Share Posted December 14, 2006 my boyfriend and i have been dating for almost 5 months and he still talks to his ex girlfriend, i dont mind if they are friends but she doesnt know he has a new girlfriend. i have been in her shoes and it wasnt fair to me. i felt like my ex was keeping me on the side just n case his new girlfriend didn't work out. my boyfriend tells me he doesn't tell her because he doesn't want to hear he bitch -and she's crazy and its convenient. im being played huh? Not necessarily. It's very possible that he doesn't want to deal with the ex girlfriend drama. I was in a similar situation when I was dating my bf (now ex) for about a month. He didn't tell his ex he was dating someone because she was instrumental in getting his recipe in the newspaper and didn't want to make waves. I got tired of her 2:00am phone calls. I said to him, "This is not a threat, but if you cannot tell xxxx that you have a girlfriend, then you are just keeping the door open for her and I should be free to date other people." Or something along those lines, but absolutely not angry-just matter-of-fact. And I meant every word. Apparently, that woke him up. The next day he called and told her he had a girlfriend and those phone calls stopped. Your bf may be truthful in his reasoning (and you aren't being played), but that doesn't mean you should put up with it. Link to post Share on other sites
Krytellan Posted December 14, 2006 Share Posted December 14, 2006 Not necessarily. It's very possible that he doesn't want to deal with the ex girlfriend drama. BAH!!! That's crap If she doesn't know after 5 months, there's a motive there. Follow your gut. We only keep SOs secret if they have potential to ruin something. Link to post Share on other sites
climbergirl Posted December 14, 2006 Share Posted December 14, 2006 BAH!!! That's crap If she doesn't know after 5 months, there's a motive there. Follow your gut. We only keep SOs secret if they have potential to ruin something. HEY! I'm trying to be optimistic here. You could be right, but maybe the ex is psycho. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted December 14, 2006 Share Posted December 14, 2006 Well, if the ex gf is a crazy psycho, why is he having anything to do with her in the first place? Why be friends with someone like that? BF needs to get his ass in gear and either tell her or break off the friendship. Keeping you a secret is his way of keeping her around just in case, I think. If it's not, then he shouldn't care what her reaction is. So what if she goes psycho? He's not obligated to talk to her and doesn't have to hear it. Link to post Share on other sites
climbergirl Posted December 14, 2006 Share Posted December 14, 2006 My point is being missed. And my point is this; It doesn't really do much good to moralize on why he isn't telling the ex. The OP will get her answer on where she stands (with him)when she takes the situ. by the reigns and issues an ultimatum. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sweetsexylove Posted April 1, 2007 Author Share Posted April 1, 2007 this guy is now my ex-bf, he turned into an extremely lazy guy, who didn't put much into the relationship. It was all about sex, but when he stopped cleaning his apartment and never expressed how he felt about me I cut him off! I figured he was holding onto something or maybe he just wasn't that into me. Were still friends, more like aquaintences. Link to post Share on other sites
Author sweetsexylove Posted April 1, 2007 Author Share Posted April 1, 2007 this guy is now my ex-bf, he turned into an extremely lazy guy, who didn't put much into the relationship. It was all about sex, but when he stopped cleaning his apartment and never expressed how he felt about me I cut him off! He never told his ex girl about me. I figured he was holding onto something or maybe he just wasn't that into me. Were still friends....more like aquaintences. Link to post Share on other sites
mental_traveller Posted April 3, 2007 Share Posted April 3, 2007 Not necessarily being played. He may just think that his ex has no right to know anything about his personal life. But after 5 months that's long enough for the ex to accept he is seeing a new girl, so I would start asking why he doesn't tell her. If she can't handle the facts of him dating you, then she isn't really a friend at all. I would start pushing for him to tell her (in your presence) that he is now dating you. Link to post Share on other sites
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