How far can I take NC if I want him back?

[Kristybelle]

I'm asking this because my situation is rather complicated. I cannot do a complete NC because he lives in my apartment building. We are bound to run into each other since the closest way to get to my vehicle is to walk right by his apartment.

 

We broke up in October and I just can't get over him. I've tried very hard to stop thinking about him all the time but I just can't do it. We were together for around two months and he is the first guy I've ever fallen in love with. My friends say that I should talk to him and tell him how I feel, but I am too afraid that will just push him farther away. Plus, he's seeing someone else. Not just someone else, his ex that hurt him so badly that he was afraid to get into a relationship with me.

 

He broke things off in October because he said he was afraid to fall in love with me and that he wasn't ready for a relationship. After he broke up with me, I was very upset but calm. I didn't shed a tear and told him I was sorry it couldn't work out but I hoped we could still be friends. I waited until he was out the door before I broke down. Over the next few days, when I saw him downstairs I acted very nonchalant, just said hi and moved on, even when he tried to initiate conversation.

 

This freaked him out and so he called me like crazy over the next week, texting how much he missed me and even once stopping me outside to ask if I was seeing anyone else. Finally, we talked again and I told him that it was confusing that he was acting this way. We had a long talk and he admitted that he wanted to be with me and wanted me back, but that he didn't think it was the right thing to do. He said he didn't want to hurt me and he was afraid that he couldn't let himself fall for me and would do the same thing. He gave me the option of letting things go back to where they were or to stop seeing him.

 

I chose to stop seeing him because we were never truly together because he wouldn't agree to date exclusively. I wanted to be his girlfriend or nothing. So I did NC again, just saying hello downstairs and acting like I didn't care. He openly admitted that he missed me but we never got back together because I was too proud to answer his phone calls or talk to him. I thought that through NC he would realize that he didn't want to be without me.

 

In November, he invited me down to see him and I refused. The next night, I saw him with his ex girlfriend. After that, I really did NC because it hurt to see them together. I avoided him as much as I could and then eventually stopped trying so hard to avoid him. Once I did that, I noticed that he was avoiding me. Since he's now avoiding me, I've only seen him downstairs twice, once with her and once without her.

 

When I saw him with her, he ignored me. Without her, he said hello and watched me walk to my car, to the point that one of his friends asked why he was looking at me like that. The only contact I've had with him is a text message asking for my DVD back. He saw one of my roommates downstairs and told her to tell me he would bring it to me sometime. He didn't give it to her to give to me. This makes me think he wants to see me, but I'm not sure.

 

My friends say that since I can't get over it, I have to talk to him. It's just so difficult to do that, though, since he's with someone else and I'm afraid to get hurt all over again. I miss him so much every day and would love to be with him again, but I don't think talking to him is going to make that happen. What should I do? Please help.

[Guest]

Is he officially back with his ex?

[kristybelle]

Is he officially back with his ex?

 

Reports from a semi-unreliable friend say yes. I know he's at least seeing her again, whether or not they're in a "relationship," I'm not sure.

[Guest]

Reports from a semi-unreliable friend say yes. I know he's at least seeing her again, whether or not they're in a "relationship," I'm not sure.

 

 

if he or she is back with an ex - stay away

 

they are involved with another

 

never intrude in something like that