Aloros Posted December 20, 2006 Share Posted December 20, 2006 I've been dating a fantastic guy for six months. Each of us had crushes on the other from the moment we met. He treats me so well, and basically checks off everything on my list of what I want in a guy, plus some things I consider bonuses. We rarely fight, and when we do, it's generally over a misunderstanding and it is resolved in good humor. One thing has started to really bother me. We practically live at one another's places, and I noticed he has women's underwear in his drawers - and it is not mine. It is his ex's underwear, a girl he dated over a year ago and who was engaged to be married. She decided to go through with the marriage, and is now married. He keeps in touch with her once in a while. Whenever I see it, it makes me feel rather jealous, and I'm not really a jealous person by nature. It leaves me feeling a little...gross. I told him this, and he said he should probably just throw it away. A week later, and it was still there. We had a frank discussion last night, wherein I told him I wouldn't change a thing about him, except for that underwear in his drawer. He said he could see why it would bother me, and that he thought about dropping her a line and mailing it to her, but her husband probably wouldn't like that. He then stated again that he should probably just throw it away. I asked him to tell me if he had reasons for holding onto it, and he said he just had problems throwing things out (which seems to be true, judging from his apartment). I had a dream last night that he cheated on me with her (which is ridiculous since we spend so much time together), and now I'm here at work, feeling sick to my stomach. Should I let this bother me so much? He's obviously very devoted to me, and I know that in reality I have nothing to worry about, but I hate the fact he still has it. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted December 20, 2006 Share Posted December 20, 2006 No need to start anything.. Throw the underwear in the trash.. problem solved. I think that a woman's underwear in any man's dresser is subject to quick and speedy removal.. if not not the guy then by the girl. and no you have a right to be upset... Role reversal.. I certainly would be upset if my GF was keeping an old flames underwear in her dresser..Where sooner or later mine are supposed to be Link to post Share on other sites
IpAncA Posted December 20, 2006 Share Posted December 20, 2006 Humm....well...if the relationship is really over then they shouldn't be talking because she is married now and he should either call her and tell her to get the underwear or he's going to throw them away. I can understand why you would be upset but this is really an easy problem to fix. Just get rid of them and the both of you move on. O yes and like Art said, there is no need to start anything or break up with him over this. O and BTW just be thankful that he's not walking around wearing them. Now that wouldn't be good. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted December 20, 2006 Share Posted December 20, 2006 Are U Sure It Was An Ex's? Maybe He Has A Fetish? I Have Been Known To Wear Dresses On Stage During Gigs - So Who Knows? Do U Have Better Underwear? Do U Look Ultra Sexy With Undies Or Without? I Would Walk Into The Bedroom Wearing Something That Would Blow His Mind, Open The Drawer, Take The Undies In One Hand, And Go Between His Legs, Just Close But Not Touching With Yer Lips And Then Say...its Yer Decision Buddy? U'll Never See Those Granny Pants Again! Lol Speaking Of Between The Legs Action [yes, Its Been A While - Lol], Have U Ever 'done' Something, Just Happens, Natural And Not Planned And Your Woman Questioned Where That Idea Came From? I Ask Because, I Remember One Night Where She Was On Her 3 Oral O [what Can I Say? When U Enjoy Giving It Ususally It Great - Wink] And I Moved Up And Over Her, Looking Deep In Her Eyes, She Could She How Wet My Face Was And I Slowly Leaned Down And Kissed Her [never Did That Before] And It Was Really Passionate - The Point Is When U Do Something Naturally And For The First Time With Someone Do Women Over Think Or Enjoy? Link to post Share on other sites
IpAncA Posted December 20, 2006 Share Posted December 20, 2006 Are U Sure It Was An Ex's? Maybe He Has A Fetish? I Have Been Known To Wear Dresses On Stage During Gigs - So Who Knows? Do U Have Better Underwear? Do U Look Ultra Sexy With Undies Or Without? I Would Walk Into The Bedroom Wearing Something That Would Blow His Mind, Open The Drawer, Take The Undies In One Hand, And Go Between His Legs, Just Close But Not Touching With Yer Lips And Then Say...its Yer Decision Buddy? U'll Never See Those Granny Pants Again! Lol Speaking Of Between The Legs Action [yes, Its Been A While - Lol], Have U Ever 'done' Something, Just Happens, Natural And Not Planned And Your Woman Questioned Where That Idea Came From? I Ask Because, I Remember One Night Where She Was On Her 3 Oral O [what Can I Say? When U Enjoy Giving It Ususally It Great - Wink] And I Moved Up And Over Her, Looking Deep In Her Eyes, She Could She How Wet My Face Was And I Slowly Leaned Down And Kissed Her [never Did That Before] And It Was Really Passionate - The Point Is When U Do Something Naturally And For The First Time With Someone Do Women Over Think Or Enjoy? What does between the legs action have to do with this man's ex's underwear? :laugh: Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted December 21, 2006 Share Posted December 21, 2006 If he doesn't get rid of it, tell him you're starting to think he might be wearing her underwear and is really a secret cross-dresser. If that doesn't get him to throw it out, nothing will! Link to post Share on other sites
Brian18 Posted December 21, 2006 Share Posted December 21, 2006 I can definitely see your point about it. However, I am a guy that has a pair of underwear from my ex-girlfriend from the first time we had sex. I now have a girlfriend that I am crazy about and still have the underwear, not because I want them, just because I forgot about them. They mean absolutely nothing to me, I just forgot, and never did anything with them. I'm sure the underwear mean nothing to him as well, and he just hasn't thown them out yet. Keep up on him, until he does it. Make subtle hints about it and he'll eventually just do it, and i bet he won't think twice about it. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 21, 2006 Share Posted December 21, 2006 Yes, that would really bother me. Tell him to throw it in the trash bin in the kitchen so it's too disgusting to retrieve, while you're watching. Tell him it's a symbolic thing for him to do for you. I see no need to tiptoe around something of this nature and will be a good indicator of his true feelings for the ex. Link to post Share on other sites
alphamale Posted December 21, 2006 Share Posted December 21, 2006 dudes hang on to this stuff as momentoes of our "conquests"....I still have a pair of pantyhose I ripped of this girl just before we f*cked in my truck. Her name was Angie and this was 1989. Ahh...what a nite it was. Her breasts were young and firm and...and....and.... Link to post Share on other sites
Author Aloros Posted December 21, 2006 Author Share Posted December 21, 2006 Thanks for all the advice! He's throwing it away today. Good riddance! I'm glad he understood. Link to post Share on other sites
Grrlish Posted December 22, 2006 Share Posted December 22, 2006 Good. As others have mentioned, a lot of people keep mementos of past relationships. Mine (jewelry, cards, love notes, photos, other items) are in boxes in the garage or up on high shelves. Not hanging around in my dresser drawers. These things are to look at on occasion, or when you're 75. Not to pull out and look at weekly as you pull out your socks. No harm in keeping mementos. Just keep them in appropriate locations. Link to post Share on other sites
Ariadne Posted December 22, 2006 Share Posted December 22, 2006 Hi, I asked him to tell me if he had reasons for holding onto it, and he said he just had problems throwing things out Why would you want the guy to get rid of things that are his? Would you like him to tell you he has a problem with your CD collection for whatever reason? Ariadne Link to post Share on other sites
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