-moving out of town & want to make a move -thanks!!!

[californiakid]

So this is my story from about 5 months ago...basically we have had very little contact since-exchanged a few e-mails of no real importance...a few text messages...she is moving out of town in a couple of weeks and i want to try to restore what we had to any level-i asked her to dinner next week-although haven't heard back yet. i don't know whether i stick w/ NC or just spill my guts/feelings again in a last attempt. don't intent to be desperate, but maybe she wants to hear how i felt. whaddya think?

 

Where to start? So I met a chick who recently moved to my city. Right from the start, we were attracted to one another and seemed to click from the get-go. We started to date right away which ended up being 5-6 months. I wasn't her only friend as she made friends at work and knew some people, but the majority of her life transpired through me to an extent which made me feel a bit overwhelmed at times since she was more into me in the beginning months of our relationship due to the circumstances. I am a very independent person and was into her, but not nearly as much as she was which I think became an issue for her, although she didn't express it to me in a way that would help me fix the problem.

 

Nonetheless, I really had a great time spending time with her and immersed her in my life and introduced her to the majority of my friends and family where she made a good impression and it made me feel good about everything. My doctor's office is in the building in which she lived which made the circumstances of the relationship a bit trickier and she was also out-of-town a week+/month which made the continuity of our relationship a bit trickier than usual.

 

Nonetheless, I cared for her and really liked her, but I believe I was not as forth-coming with my feelings until later on when she started to doubt my interest in "us". She always thought she cared about me a ton, where she thought I was more in it to be in it. About 4 months into our relationship, we were both taking our situation somewhat for granted to an extent and didn't communicate as well as we could have during that time. Everything seemed to be going fairly well until she randomly ran into her ex of 7+ years (with whom she thought she was going to marry). Our next talk, she decided that I might not be "the one." So we basically took a week apart and took sometime to think about the situation and we started to have talks about how we could stengthen our relationship. The ball remained in her court and I let her have the space that she had asked for. I had a good feeling about it all, although nothing is certain as we all know way to well. After a week apart, we get back together for another month and for the most part everything seems like its back to normal, but I put more pressure on myself to make sure that she knew that I really cared for her. However, then out of the blue she decided that we should break-up telling me very briefly that it was for the same reasons as before. You should also know that she tends to make quick decisions and realizes that is a fault of hers. Anyways, now we haven't really spoken much since our splitsville, so we never really had a discussion about this all. Right afterwards I wrote an e-mail saying that it would be nice to have a conversation with regards to "us" to have some closure and understand everything.

 

She ended up calling me the night I was at a concert (not sure if that was on purpose or not), but she did state that she thought we should talk about our situation. I waited a few days to collect my thoughts (while I went out w/ a couple of other women) and then decided to call and left a voicemail just letting her know that I was willing to talk when she had time, although I preferred to have the conversation in person. No response and then I left one last VM another week later. Basically I went to NC for the next 3 weeks although we ran into each other, although basically avoided a conversation as we were never in direct contact. I did decide to send her a bday card and a small present on her bday (thought i was taking the high-road, although maybe I should have obstained). Nonetheless, seems like she is sorta unwilling to have a conversation now (although I haven't spoken to her in 4 weeks now) and when she did call, she wanted to do it over the phone. I still have feelings for her, however I think she is after another boy right now, although I know she has obstained from any hooking-up to this point, post-us. I on the other hand have gone out with a few women, however, it truly hasn't been the same. I am not sure if she is the "one," however I was looking to give it more time to see if it would develop into something longer-standing. She felt that her "timeclock" was wasting and apparently questioned dating me further if it wasn't gonna lead down the "road to marraige" This has been a month post-us....what to do to at least bring this back to what we were before we dated which is friends or maybe even trying to reconile this and see if it could work out again....I know the best thing for myself is to move-on and re-establish my own life again and if its meant to be, so be it. Although, at the sametime, I know that there is no rush in time, but I don't want all these feelings and emotions to shift to the backburner to never reoccur again. I have never felt this way about a woman before and I surely don't want to live in a world of "what if's" any longer......please advise as I greatly appreciate any insight you might have...I think my best bet is to move on because I don't have another choice, but I have trouble living in regret...I know that with time I will have more of a clear view on the relationship & believe that if it was meant to be, it will come back, but at the same time I feel time is against me....