panzer6 Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 They are all crazy, but there still the best ones on the planet! LOL!! Link to post Share on other sites
Teacher's Pet Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 What do they say about us canadian chicks? Hmm.... how badly you wanna know.... -tp dirtbag! Link to post Share on other sites
demilde Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 What do they say about us canadian chicks? they're from canada. Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 hey D just been following this thread i've not posted before,, just wondering what he meant by cleared the air? what exactly did you guys clear..... it just doesn't seem like you cleared anything up.. atleast on his part..... Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 I can't believe that after 5 months that I'm still reeling. I mean we barely dated a year... It is because you have never truly done NC yet.. Between all the emails you send him and the emails he sends you and then throw in him showing up at your door and the phone calls and meetings you have yet to do NC to the point where you can heal.. Why keep picking the scab ? Do NC from now on.. Stop sending him smoke signal emails.. Stop all contact... Stop the contact... you will heal... Link to post Share on other sites
Author D-Lish Posted January 7, 2007 Author Share Posted January 7, 2007 I'm going full on NC now. Time to put it all behind me. I've done all that I can do. It's about time I moved on and put effort into healing myself. Thanks, D Link to post Share on other sites
Porn_Guy Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 yes D-L, my prescription is total unadulterated NC like A_C says... Link to post Share on other sites
Cub Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 I'm going full on NC now. Time to put it all behind me. I've done all that I can do. It's about time I moved on and put effort into healing myself. Thanks, D W00T!! Now keep that attitude and you'll do great! Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 unadulterated NC I have always like hearing this terminology.. It means ALL contact.. even contact from him to you.. I have always felt that the loudest statement is silence.. I learned that from having silence applied to me and realizing the effect if had on me. Link to post Share on other sites
Porn_Guy Posted January 7, 2007 Share Posted January 7, 2007 I have always felt that the loudest statement is silence... not only is it the loudest....its also the safest Link to post Share on other sites
Author D-Lish Posted January 7, 2007 Author Share Posted January 7, 2007 I agree, it's the only way to heal. No more setting myself up for disappointment. He sent me an e-mail saying thanks for the meeting. I have chosen not to respond. It's done, and I'm closing the lines of communication as of now. Thanks. D Link to post Share on other sites
ritamae Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 D, my BF and I broke up in June this past year. He said his feelings had changed. That he did not feel like he would commit to me any longer. He was not thinking about me daily. Those words all hurt - BIG TIME! We have been back together for 5 months now, but I wanted to let you know what I learned while I was without him. I learned that I had been too much about him in the last year of our relationship. (we will be together 4 years this month). That last year I allowed him to be the source of my happiness. I was not taking care of myself as much. Did not do things that made me happy as much. It was always about him. Now, I know what makes me happy and I am doing things that make me happy. My happiness does not come from my BF. He does enhance my life. You need to figure out what makes D happy. Not just ExBF. What do you do that you enjoy? Get yourself back. I have to say, I believe men find women that can figure out their own happiness far more attractive than a woman that relies on a man for happiness and joy. Yes, my man wants me to need him to fix the sink and change that tricky bulb but he does not want me to need him to fill my life with happiness and fun. I am not even sure I am making any sense here. My main point is to work more on you than on this old relationship. You have to make your happiness. Link to post Share on other sites
Author D-Lish Posted January 8, 2007 Author Share Posted January 8, 2007 Thanks RM, You're completely right. I'm not happy with myself right now. That is part of the reason why I have chosen to stay away from dating anyone at the moment. I fear that in my state of mind that I would choose a partner who is all wrong for me. Now that I have decided to move on, I want to use this time to get back on my feet, to find that happiness and confidence again. After my marriage fell apart, I had to re-learn how to be happy in my independance again. I think I went into my last relationship fooling myself into believing I was ready- but the truth is that I don't think I was. I am going to endeavour to do everything possible to turn things around for myself- and that includes grieving properly. Learning to be alone without being lonley. I'll get back there again. Thanks for the words of encouragement. :-) D Link to post Share on other sites
fjk82 Posted January 8, 2007 Share Posted January 8, 2007 Hi D- In some way you have gotton some since of closure like I kinda did. It will all get better...Time is the only thing that heals.. Let me know how your grieving is coming along and if you have any tips to that process please pass them along to me. I am also in that state where I am not happy with myself either and nobody can change that or make it better other than ourselves. Good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author D-Lish Posted January 9, 2007 Author Share Posted January 9, 2007 I think that as soon as you come to the realization that it's really over- the healing begins. Actually acknowledging that it's time to move on is a really good start. I followed your story, and I know that you, like I, have been stuck in the waiting and hoping period for a long while. I've been sad since my meeting. But at least I know it's really over. Let the fact that it's over sink in. That's what I'm doing right now. At night before bed is the worst, most lonley time for me. So, when I go to bed, I read and read until I'm too tired to think about the ex. It also tends to help to think about all the reasons why my ex isn't the right guy for me. i focus on the negative as much as I can. As soon as I start thinking of a good memory of him- I replace it with the thought of an annoying habit or one of his faults. It helps a little. It'll pass, this sadness. Link to post Share on other sites
T-Lady Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Ritamea I would love to hear more details about your story. T Link to post Share on other sites
ImInPain Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 You know my story. Well it got worse. She last talked to me @ Thanksgiving and told me she loved and couldn't live without me. Then I ask her about what's up with this guy she is always with and she gets pissed says Im jealous and disappears again. Well I see her out with said guy and I confront them. They both deny and she says Im crazy. I tell her I had a PI tracking her and have pictures. She and the new guy call me and tell me they are going to press harassment charges against me and have me arrested and cause me to lose my job. Now mind you this is almost 1 month to the day that she contatcted me after 2 months of NC to tell me she loved me. She calls me a week ago and says she can't live in this not knowing if she is being followed and I need to tell her if she is. I say I don't have to tell her anything. I owe her the same courtesy she has shown me -NOTHING- ... I ask her about this new guy that she is supposedly seeing and she says they are hanging out and she doesn't love him. Now today I get an Email that she wants to meet me at my work and give me back my EZ-Pass and the Engagement ring. I am not even going to respond. D-lish you are a strong woman and you deserve better than him no matter what you believe you did to cause any of the problem. It's not you it's him. WE CANNOT MAKE SOMEONE ELSE LOVE US BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Well I see her out with said guy and I confront them. I tell her I had a PI tracking her and have pictures. Now today I get an Email that she wants to meet me at my work and give me back my EZ-Pass and the Engagement ring. I am not even going to respond. Dude.. you are whacked.. you just told her you were stalking her in front of a witness.. WTF is wrong with you ? Email her back and have her mail your the ring and ezpass and never speak to her again...Only say that.. don't mention anything else She is trying to give you the stuff back so she can write you off and you have no reason to speak to her.. Stop trying to intimidate her.. No woman is ever going to love a man that threatens her with stalking.. Sorry to be harsh but........ Link to post Share on other sites
CaliGuy Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Dude.. you are whacked.. you just told her you were stalking her in front of a witness.. WTF is wrong with you ? Email her back and have her mail your the ring and ezpass and never speak to her again...Only say that.. don't mention anything else She is trying to give you the stuff back so she can write you off and you have no reason to speak to her.. Stop trying to intimidate her.. No woman is ever going to love a man that threatens her with stalking.. Sorry to be harsh but........ Art, I don't think you were being harsh. He needed the wake up smack. Wow. Link to post Share on other sites
ImInPain Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 I am not following her and what is against the law in having a PI track someone? Is it OK to have your wife or husband followed but not your lying cheating Fiancee? I think your both wrong. I am not trying to win her back. What I was getting at is I love her with all my heart and if someone does not reciprocate in the same manner you must move on. I am trying and she can live in the fear that she is being followed. Not by me but a PI. Read more carefully next time. Please don't blow a S**T storm at me over this I really don't care I was just telling D-lish to move on. I had no closure from this miserable excuse of a woman and I now have it and can work on my life. She need not know anything and I do not want the ring back. She is just trying to cause more pain and drama. I am done she is DEAD IN MY EYES. Sad but true. I am moving on and I don't care if she has to live in fear of being followed. I came home every day to an empty apartment looking in my front and rear door for a ring and a note saying piss off and it ruined my life. Karma my friends Karma. Ain't love grand. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 I am not following her and what is against the law in having a PI track someone? You need to seek some therapy.. it is only my opinion.. but you seem to be very close to the edge and going over to the point where you possibly might be talking to a judge.. Stalking is against the law and you are freely admitting to doing it.. Link to post Share on other sites
ImInPain Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 I have been in Therapy since she started screwing with my head and heart. Please understand I am not stalking nor do I really have a PI following her. Let her believe what she wants much like you will. I had information and needed the truth I wasn't getting from her. I now have the truth and can move on. The hell with her needs @ this point. When do I get to worry about my needs and healing myself. That is what I am trying to do and if she is having trouble dealing with things so be it. In NY there is no way she can bring me in front of a Judge for anything. I am not even related to her. Please tell me where I am stalking and freely admitting to doing it? I do not go to her stupid Karaoke BS shows which I know she is @ everynight and where. I do not show up @ her house or job. I ran into her in my town miles away and confronted them and yelled. No threats and crap just got my voice heard. I have done nothing. In fact I spoke to a police officer afterwards and he said there is almost nothing she or the guy can do. Not enough to even bother. Sorry to burst your bubble but maybe NY has different laws. D-lish sorry to Hijack your post. I wish you the best as always and good luck. You seem like a sweetheart and you so deserve better as do I. I know this woman that I love soooooo much will wake up and realize what she lost and I hope to be long gone by then. My heart will always remember and probably wish it was her's but I must move on. Link to post Share on other sites
Art_Critic Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 Sorry to burst your bubble but maybe NY has different laws. Good Luck IIP.. Everyone deserves a chance at happiness..I hope you get yours Link to post Share on other sites
Author D-Lish Posted January 14, 2007 Author Share Posted January 14, 2007 Art Critic... you're such a diplomat! IIP... don't stalk... it's not cool. Hey Art, I had a date tonight... went well. Guess what? I think I'm moving on! I feel better! :-) D Link to post Share on other sites
demilde Posted January 14, 2007 Share Posted January 14, 2007 Art Critic... you're such a diplomat! IIP... don't stalk... it's not cool. Hey Art, I had a date tonight... went well. Guess what? I think I'm moving on! I feel better! :-) D Thats gonna disappoint most of the red-blooded males on here ;-) Link to post Share on other sites
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