Marilyn Posted August 19, 2002 Share Posted August 19, 2002 Okay I am going to make this short, I am still in love with my ex, but I have met someone. Should I tell my ex and see what he thinks? I am so scared to move on. I feel as if I am going to get hurt, hurt someone, or make a bad choice. Would it be fare to date this new interest? When I love my ex and talk to him quite a bit. Also I am afraid to let this new guy hold me or even touch me, I feel like I am hurting my ex. Maybe I'm not ready............. Link to post Share on other sites
Bill Posted August 19, 2002 Share Posted August 19, 2002 You seem to be jumping from guy to guy very quickly. Slow down and take some time off! Of course you are not ready! Don't let someone develop false feelings for you, like this new guy. End this before he gets hurt. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted August 19, 2002 Share Posted August 19, 2002 why are you willing to let your ex boyfriend have that kind of hold over you still? As many people have pointed out in different postings, an ex is an ex for a particular reason; you're not hurting him by moving on, but hurting YOURSELF for refusing to move on. yes, it's scary thinking jumping back into the dating pool, of possibly getting your feelings hurt, but the good news is, you're built to bounce back if it happens again. Who knows? This guy could be the one who you're meant to be with, the best thing that has happened in your life, could become a good friend or someone to spend quality time with, but you'll never find out if you keep chosing to hide behind your feeling for your ex. out of curiosity, has your ex moved on? Is he seeing other people, but keeping up contact with you? Does he see you as someone who has become a friend, or are you his rainy day girl, the one he knows who will be there waiting for him if things don't work out with other girls? honey, you aren't doing yourself any favors cloistering yourself from dating because you still hope there might be a chance with your ex. Like I pointed out earlier, he's your ex for a reason. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Marilyn Posted August 19, 2002 Author Share Posted August 19, 2002 I haven't dated anyone for four months. That is a long time for me. He isn't dating and we say that we are just friends but we talk like we are still in love. He is a marine we plan on trying to make it work when he comes home in May. Would he still love and want to be with me if I date other people or will that push him away? Link to post Share on other sites
velvet Posted August 20, 2002 Share Posted August 20, 2002 If your dating other people and claim to still be in love with your ex and the two of you are planning to work it out, you have problems. First of all when in love with someone you don't have the desire to date anyone else. The thought wouldn't enter your mind. Your not in love with your ex so by all means go ahead and date all the men you can handle. Second, military r/s don't work out well all the time either. Try meeting someone who have the opportunity to spend time with anytime to want. When the cats away, the mice will want to play! Link to post Share on other sites
lostrealization Posted September 2, 2002 Share Posted September 2, 2002 it sounds like you may need some time to get over your ex. dating someone new could help you do this. just go slow and explain to this new guy that you just cant stop loving your ex right now. maybe he'll understand. Link to post Share on other sites
honeybee255 Posted September 9, 2002 Share Posted September 9, 2002 i hate to bust your bubble but military relationships dont work out that well..i have seen many married men as well as those engaged go off and cheat, both men and women...yes when the cats are away the mice still want to play .. And hes not back until may?Is he overseas?Im overseas right now and it is so hard to be in a relationship, in general with military because of the constant travel..im sorry to bust your bubble but it sounds like to me you need to move on..you never know about this new guy, he could be the man of your dreams!!May is quite some time from now.. Link to post Share on other sites
Jonarsh Posted September 9, 2002 Share Posted September 9, 2002 Firstly, ur ex isn't your bf anymore, so I don't see a point reporting to him about this new guy that you have just met. Then again, since you are just starting out with this new guy, I think you should be fair by telling him that you still have strong feelings for your ex. instead of subconciously taking him for a back-up in case ur ex. doesn't come back to you. You have to let his new guy know in case once he starts to have feelings for you, he might get hurt even more.... I think you are not ready for another relationship... I have been in this similiar situation, so don't mind my tone.. Link to post Share on other sites
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