dxh Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 Hey everyone, maybe you guys can give me some advice?.... There is this girl that i became very good friends with. We completely were confident around each other and always had a very awesome time. However, recently i have developed feelings for her like crazy, and for some reason, (this may sound wierd), i can no longer talk to her with such ease as i usually did. For example, i sometimes think like what should i say next and stuff.... I reallly dont want to mess this up. Also, i often try to remember what i used to say prior to having feelings for her, or how i acted-- and NOTHING COMES TO MIND!!!.... please give me some advice, or tell me what i should do, or say. Thanx Also, when thinking about how i am around other girls, everything had always been much differently. I always treated this girl with the most care, ... and stuff. Link to post Share on other sites
che_jesse Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 The way I look at is you should not have to "work" to be around/with the person that you are interested/in a relationship with. All of this should be natural, if your having to force any of it then I don't think its meant to be. Link to post Share on other sites
FallenTree Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 Maybe you're just really nervous whenever you are around this person. I like it when guys ask lots of questions to show interest and beyond that, remember what I've said afterwards and joke about it later! I like questions about what I did during the day, music, what ifs? questions, etc. However, if you find you still have to work at conversation, it may be right...it may just not be meant to be. Link to post Share on other sites
JCD Posted January 10, 2007 Share Posted January 10, 2007 This is normal and before you go any further you need to ask her how she feels about you. If she rejects you but wants you as a friend, it will be very hard on you and will feel like chinese water torture. Link to post Share on other sites
BlueEyedGirl Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 The way I look at is you should not have to "work" to be around/with the person that you are interested/in a relationship with. All of this should be natural, if your having to force any of it then I don't think its meant to be. I don't agree. The way I see it, the people I'm most comfortable with are my close friends and family. Not because we are all perfect personality click but because we have known each other for a long time. When you are first getting to know someone it's always a bit awakward, filled with meaningless small talk etc. It's only in the movies where everything is OMG so natural and perfect. I'm much more nervous around people that I am attracted to. People I couldn't care less about, I really don't care what I talk about. Link to post Share on other sites
magichands Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 and will feel like chinese water torture. How can something so bad feel so good?! I agree with BlueEyedGirl, FallenTree, JCD - just nerves. We all get them when we're doing something that really matters to us. I think che_jesse is alluding to the old "chemistry" chestnut. You gotta have chemistry. Bring on the Chinese water torture. The US television program Mythbusters investigated Chinese water torture and found that dripping water on the forehead, by itself, was not particularly stressful. Immobilizing the subject and running a continuous stream of water on the forehead proved the most stressful of the methods they tried, and that cold water intensified the effect. I just love the thought that someone would go to that much trouble... for me. Link to post Share on other sites
Author dxh Posted January 13, 2007 Author Share Posted January 13, 2007 Thanks everyone... i think that you guys are correct in saying it becomes a kinda tough to talk to the girl or person when you are really attracted to he/ she, especially if one is nervous about messing it up or failing, i guess. I got to note this first hand, cos guess what, i accidentally mistook her for her sister, when she called me (her sister is also my friend) and talking to what i thought was her sister was so easy, like if i didnt even care....then we laughed together.... Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 13, 2007 Share Posted January 13, 2007 What do u do when every1 says yes, and you say no? I really dont want to go to a new school, i dont feel comfortable with doing it, and i dont think its a good idea. But my parents r all like think it over, i think u should go, its a good place, they will help u there. Well why would i get emotional help there, when i go to therapy? it makes no sense to me, and its really upseting me. *sighs* So i have to think about going to the new school or not....the thing is i already set my mind on no, so thats what my choice will most likely be. I am just so stressed out right now. YOU ARE STRESSED BECAUSE THAT'S JUST PART OF NORMAL LIFE WITH NEW THINGS/ I DO THAT ALL THE TIME TOO THAT';S WHY WHEN U HAVE MR. FUNNYHEAD DISTRACTING U U DON'T FOCUS ON THAT PLUS, AS U KNOW - WHEN U DO THE WORK GREAT THINGS HAPPEN LOOK AT WHAT U HAVE DONE THE LAST TWO DAYS I AM BLOWN AWAY LOVE U EVEN MORE - I KNOW I KNOW ENUFF WITH THE LOVE AND DEEP AND THE KISSES Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 13, 2007 Share Posted January 13, 2007 Ive been holding all my feelings in, not talking to any1 about them, but this is wut ive always done, and now im starting to wonder about it. I mean i dont need to talk to any1 i dont hold my feelings in all the time... *sighs* Tomorrow im going to a meeting with the guiedence counclers at my school and my parents. *sighs* i hope it snows alot and we get off. The school meeting is gonna suck..well no idk but thats my guess. Anyways i hope it all goes well... hmmmmm, i knew i guy that used to do that - HE'S A COKE JUNKIE NOW BECAUSE I DIDN'T LET IT OUT DON'T FOLLOW HIS LEAD Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 13, 2007 Share Posted January 13, 2007 babe, how do u do this stuff? i mean am i whacked? i just can't believe how talented u are and when do u sleep? see, i am confused because why would someone care about me so much to do this. if u love doing this stuff, u should do it full time - u are so good at it. i hoped u liked my romantic gesture earlier. i am sorry this is so hard on u. maybe that's what is really my main goal right now [small steps - one at a time] - it kills me as much as it does u to know that two people in love can't meet. i will not give up tho - i made this mess and i'll clean it up. as for the addiction, i understand how concerned u are and as i said, i am not stopping until i see u and then i will never go back - i want to earn yer trust and have u believe in me. that's why i am still junked. see, u already recognized the 'gift' - next stage is the power you possess - not control, not manipulate, only the power of someone with inner spirit and beauty. this is tied to self-image, self worth, u are powerful babe. believe in yourself and that u can 'give' not 'fix' just by being yerself. love g Link to post Share on other sites
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