Guest Posted January 9, 2007 Share Posted January 9, 2007 My boyfriend broke up with me about a month and a half ago and we've been seing eachother several times after that. Every time we've been hanging out we've had a really good time and we always ended up in bed together, but we haven't started seeing eachother on a regular basis again sine my ex says he doesn't want to. Right before Christmas we went and had dinner and a had a really good time together. We ended up at his house and the next day we sayd by to eachother because we weren't going to see eachother for about two weeks over the holidays. I went away on a trip with my friend and her family and I had promised myself not to contact him. He was the one that started contacting me, every day for a week with both messages on myspace and texts. He even said he missed me once. One week later he suddenly stopped contacting me. I got worried, but promised myself not to call him, so I didn't until New Years eve when I stil hadn't heard anything from him. I was said that he hadn't called and we ended up having a short drama over the phone, only a couple of minutes. I called him 3 days later, and we had a nice 30 min long conversation talking about everything except us. He was going to fly back to where live the next day but that evening I just recevied a short comment on myspace "Flight cancelled". I texted back and asked when he was gonna fly back, and I called but he didn't pick up the phone. I called again the next day, and the same thing happened. I couldn't figure out why he suddenly seemed to be mad at me since he was rejecting my calls. He came home the next day, but we didn't meet up. His been home now for 3 days, and I still haven't seen him. I texted him on Sunday, and he replied at first and then he stopped. I called but he refused to pick up the phone, so I called again. I know I shouldn't but I did. I knew he was downtown and would be home in a bit, so I went over to his house and waited for him in his room. When he got back he freaked out and told me to get the F* out of there (of course, who wouldn't). I knew I was doing wrong by going over there but couldn't stop myself. He didn't stay and refused to talk to me, and then he left. All I wanted was to talk to him, but since he refused I didn't know what to do. So here comes the really bad part. He had a big bag with clothes on his floor since he just came home from a trip, so I grabbed that one + I packed a couple of other bags with the clothes I know he's wearing often. I brought the bags back to my place and new he was gonna have to come over and talk to me. After that I wrote him a long email explaining why I did what I did. This plan didn't work out very well! I didn't hear from him all day yesterday, and today I got a text saying that he would involve the police if I didn't return his things imidiately. He is really mad at me and refuses to talk to me. He says he never wants to see me, be my friend, or talk to me again. I know that I've done an awful mistake. I really crossed the line here and I don't blame him for being mad at me. It was a moment of desperate action from my side. Has anyone in here ever done something similar, and will he ever forgive me for doing this?? I'm on my way over to his house right now to return his things.... Link to post Share on other sites
daphne Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 guest, I'm sure at some point or another we've all had some considerable errors in judgement and made similar mistakes. But that doesn't take away the fact that you have poor impulse control and you look like a psycho to him. None of what you are currently doing is going to bring him closer to you. He's going to tell himself that he did the right thing because you're acting psycho. You need to stop this craziness. You're giving him entirely too much power. He's gone. Let him live with his decision. Link to post Share on other sites
Sand&Water Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 RE: Desperate times call for desperate measures, as in your case. He and you acted like children -even, though, you acted on instant impulses rather than rational motives, you can't turn back time and fix the past. Lucky for you, he didn't further aggravate and expel by acting in an aggressive and violent manner -then it would have bordered on abuse. He held out, and drew the line. He broke up with you. You must understand this statement. He broke up with you for a reason -thus, that is, he no longer wants to associate himself with you. I believe you should, once and for all, let go of him. Yes, it will take time -weeks or months -but, with enough distance and time, you will heal. Continue with your irrational drives and you will certainly attain more pain than you originally started with. It is time to seal the envelope, take the lessons and experience with you on to the next phase of your life. Don't contact him. No Contact. Relieve yourself of the drama, and go do something less stressful and more productive. Regards, Sand&Water Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Posted January 17, 2007 Share Posted January 17, 2007 I know that my irrational thinking ending up in this crazy impulsive behavior, pushed him even further away from me. Now he just think's I'm a psycho! He is really mad at me and refuses to talk. I know, since I've tried to appologize several times. He says that if I stop texting and calling him all the time, maybe we can talk in a couple of months. I know I need to leave him alone, and blame myself every day for what I did last week. Things were starting to get better until I totally screwed up. He told me to relax and let him contact me, but I wasn't patient enought. Patience isn't my strongest side! Is he just really mad at me for the moment or will it actually take several months before he'll talk to me again? Has anyone experienced anything similar?? Link to post Share on other sites
Ms.Fab Posted January 19, 2007 Share Posted January 19, 2007 It seems to me as if he has another girlfriend if he calls at a certain time and doesnt answer sometimes.I think you did cross the line but maybe he over reacted a bit with adding the police. And maybe you should just move on because your just causing yourself stress and heartache and really pushing him away as a friend or boyfriend. So maybe you should back off for a while and if he was a real friend he'll forgive you. My boyfriend broke up with me about a month and a half ago and we've been seing eachother several times after that. Every time we've been hanging out we've had a really good time and we always ended up in bed together, but we haven't started seeing eachother on a regular basis again sine my ex says he doesn't want to. Right before Christmas we went and had dinner and a had a really good time together. We ended up at his house and the next day we sayd by to eachother because we weren't going to see eachother for about two weeks over the holidays. I went away on a trip with my friend and her family and I had promised myself not to contact him. He was the one that started contacting me, every day for a week with both messages on myspace and texts. He even said he missed me once. One week later he suddenly stopped contacting me. I got worried, but promised myself not to call him, so I didn't until New Years eve when I stil hadn't heard anything from him. I was said that he hadn't called and we ended up having a short drama over the phone, only a couple of minutes. I called him 3 days later, and we had a nice 30 min long conversation talking about everything except us. He was going to fly back to where live the next day but that evening I just recevied a short comment on myspace "Flight cancelled". I texted back and asked when he was gonna fly back, and I called but he didn't pick up the phone. I called again the next day, and the same thing happened. I couldn't figure out why he suddenly seemed to be mad at me since he was rejecting my calls. He came home the next day, but we didn't meet up. His been home now for 3 days, and I still haven't seen him. I texted him on Sunday, and he replied at first and then he stopped. I called but he refused to pick up the phone, so I called again. I know I shouldn't but I did. I knew he was downtown and would be home in a bit, so I went over to his house and waited for him in his room. When he got back he freaked out and told me to get the F* out of there (of course, who wouldn't). I knew I was doing wrong by going over there but couldn't stop myself. He didn't stay and refused to talk to me, and then he left. All I wanted was to talk to him, but since he refused I didn't know what to do. So here comes the really bad part. He had a big bag with clothes on his floor since he just came home from a trip, so I grabbed that one + I packed a couple of other bags with the clothes I know he's wearing often. I brought the bags back to my place and new he was gonna have to come over and talk to me. After that I wrote him a long email explaining why I did what I did. This plan didn't work out very well! I didn't hear from him all day yesterday, and today I got a text saying that he would involve the police if I didn't return his things imidiately. He is really mad at me and refuses to talk to me. He says he never wants to see me, be my friend, or talk to me again. I know that I've done an awful mistake. I really crossed the line here and I don't blame him for being mad at me. It was a moment of desperate action from my side. Has anyone in here ever done something similar, and will he ever forgive me for doing this?? I'm on my way over to his house right now to return his things.... Link to post Share on other sites
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