Should I be phoney back to phoney coworkers

[Charlotte434]

My problem is..I pretty much loath 2 of my coworkers(but they don't know that) bc I have to be civil and cheerful to my coworkers:mad: . They are 2 of the most 2 faced, catty, jealous, backstabbers..you fill in the blanks I've ever encountered. I got a bad vibe from them from day one. I'm an attractive girl, young so from the day I started I would get the look up and down from one of them until I did it back to her and she never did it again. I purposely take my lunch at my desk so I don't have to sit with the 2 of them and hear them gossip and rip apart people behind their back. Anyway when 2 new girls started they purposely tried getting them to have lunch with them, being extra nice to them..well after a few weeks both girls saw their true colors and stopped taking lunch with them. I've overheard them talking crap about me on numerous occasions..one saying I was stuck up? Why bc I'm pretty and don't take smack about people behind their back lol? but they talk about everyone. I always wonder if they both even like one another or they just pretend to so they have an allie so to speak in the office. Anyway the past few months I do talk to them more, they'll invtie me to lunch..they even invited me out with them one night...ones always saying how its so great we're all friends..(this she says to a girl she said she can't stand). Thing is I am not a fake person..but pretty much have become one in the office to them both..but that's how everyone in my office is. I can't not interact with them bc I work in a very small office. They invited me out with them for a night in the coming weeks. I find the whole thing funny bc do I really think either one of them genuinely likes me..of course not. Thing is do I be phoney to them like they are to me and hang out with them just bc?

[claire21]

I completely understand where your coming from,my advice to you would be to remain civil.But don't allow them to walk all over you,as far as spending time off work with people you hate.I'd pass,make up an excuse (tired,hot date,already made plans)there is no need to bend over backwards for people who treat you aand everyone else poorly.

[SummerRae]

Thing is do I be phoney to them like they are to me and hang out with them just bc?

 

Good question!! Been there, DONE that, even have the t-shirt to prove it...

 

Honestly, if I could do it over again, I would have been more ME and not given a shyte what they thought/said, while still being diplomatic on the outside. The fact of the matter is: being professional does mean having to bite your tongue and pick your battles. You're not always going to feel like you (which sometimes can't help but feel phoney). But as long as you know that your ultimate goal is to Get The Job Done, while being nice and polite, you could stand to "be nice" to them but NOT befriend them.

 

Just always remember who you are and what you want to represent and your integrity will stand untouched.

 

Cheers,

 

Summer