booboo82 Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 This is probably silly but I just want to vent and if you want to leave your opinion/feedback be my guest. Well last night I saw my bf pleasuring himself while on the computer after I had been sleeping. i had woken up at like 2am and saw he was gone so I walked out of the bedroom and before he saw me I saw pics and heard a video while he was doing his thing. I kept walking and got some water. I then asked him what he was doing and he said he couldn't sleep and his back hurt. I said ok well I let you get back to what you were doing. he then said something about not wanting to do it next to me while I was sleeping and then I said well you could at least do it when I'm not sleeping over(We don't live together). And that was that. Nothing more was said. he eventually came to bed, said our love you's and went to sleep. The thing is, I'm not really pissed. 1. I enjoy watching porn with and without him so why can't he? 2. Its a personal and private thing and I'm sure he's a little embarrassed to know I know what he was doing(I wouldn't like it either if he caught me in the act) and... 3. Its not a big deal so I won't talk to him about it. I'm sure there will be all different opinions about this but I know I shouldn't be mad about what he was doing. When I think about, what bothers me is the fact that he went to go do it while I was sleeping in the next room...almost like he was rejecting me. Does that sound silly? We have a great sex life and all. But I guess just being there and seeing it made me really ponder the whole thing. I know he loves having sex with me and we love pleasuring eachother...but just knowing he's getting off while looking at all these other women makes me feel like I don't measure up. hmmm....don't really know what else to say about it. Because when it comes down to it, its an insecure thing and I'm not going to ask him about me not measuring up because he's obviously going to say no anyways. And i also have to think about what I feel when I look at porn. I'm not really looking at the guy and measuring my bf up to them...I'm more focused on the whole act I guess you could say and I guess I just have to hope that's the same thing with him. That its the visuals and the sounds...etc. that does it, not that the actual women have anything to do with it. Thanks for listening if you made it to here...but again, I'm only venting. Any feedback will be appreciated though. Thanks : ) Link to post Share on other sites
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