CKLyn36 Posted January 11, 2007 Share Posted January 11, 2007 I'm a 36yr old MW and operate a business from my home. Often I get shipments via UPS. I live in a rural area and I've had the same driver for 2 years. I see him around town delivering and he seems to stare for a while at me. He also mentioned to my father-in-law (who lives on the same private road as me) that the woman at the end was really attractive. I didn't even know his name until recently when I discussed getting occassional shipments out and he gave me his name and cell phone number. He said to call if I needed I needed to get a package from him sooner than the scheduled delivery and he would meet me or if I needed him to pick a package up at another location. He is married (wears the ring) and joked about his wife's QVC ordering hobby. He's very attractive and I'm very attracted to him. Is this guy interested? Should I call or text to feel it out? Link to post Share on other sites
Sup Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 NO. I think you need to leave this guy alone and work on your own marriage. Tell your husband what's been going on, he deserves to know, then go to marriage counseling. I know, not the answer you were looking for, right? Stop it, NOW! Before you really hurt your husband in a way you could never take back/undo. Is that what you want to do to your husband? Well, is it? Link to post Share on other sites
IpAncA Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Yep you should leave that guy alone and work on your own marriage. Thats what more important. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Ask him what can brown do for you? Link to post Share on other sites
JCD Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 I can't even believe what I'm reading here. Jesus. Either get divorced then chase unmarried men or get help. Link to post Share on other sites
Porn_Guy Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Ask him what can brown do for you? she could always try FedEx or USPS.... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Why are you even considering texting this guy??? He is married and so are you. Do you have children? If so, think of them. Sounds to me you and the hubby need to spend more alone time together, get intimate and reconnect again...You don't need the UPS cute MARRIED guy, all you need is the man you're married to!! Link to post Share on other sites
Porn_Guy Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Sounds to me you and the hubby need to spend more alone time together, get intimate and reconnect again... agreed...maybe they can mail-order some toys and other paraphenalia to try to get that "spark" Link to post Share on other sites
Lostgurl Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 M-A-R-R-I-E-D................................ You are both married, what else is there to say? Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 M-A-R-R-I-E-D................................ You are both married, what else is there to say? What if their marriages are bad and they are meant to be togther. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 What if their marriages are bad and they are meant to be togther. Running from their problems won't fix anything. Link to post Share on other sites
Lostgurl Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 What if their marriages are bad and they are meant to be togther. If their marriages are bad, then it's time to face it and call it quits. Why hurt other people by screwing around? It's hard enough to end up being in a bad marriage let alone making worse my betraying the person you vowed never to betray. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 What if their marriages are bad and they are meant to be togther. Then they should divorce RIGHT NOW and then be together. Ya don't test out another relationship on the side, see if it works and then go back to your spouse once you realize that other person isn't the "one". Life doesn't work that way... Link to post Share on other sites
Porn_Guy Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Then they should divorce RIGHT NOW and then be together. Ya don't test out another relationship on the side, see if it works and then go back to your spouse once you realize that other person isn't the "one". Life doesn't work that way... actually, in reality....thats EXACTLY the way life works. Link to post Share on other sites
westernxer Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 actually, in reality....thats EXACTLY the way life works. Sad but true. How sad? That's in the eye of the beholder. How true? That's in the eye of the lobotomist. Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Then they should divorce RIGHT NOW and then be together. Ya don't test out another relationship on the side, see if it works and then go back to your spouse once you realize that other person isn't the "one". Life doesn't work that way... Actually I wasn't saying they should cheat. I was saying they should give it a chance if their marriages aren't working, after they resolve their marriages. However, your description in a way makes more sense. Why end a marriage to be with someone who you don't know if it'll work out with? You have to admit life is complicated and sometimes the best step to take doesn't sound so good on paper but might be most practical. Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 She has a crush on the guy and some sexual attraction...So what? It happens, yet she has a choice CHEAT or not. And to me it seems without giving it much thought she plans on opening the door to pandora's box to see what happens... The stupid thing is, the GUY talked to her FATHER-IN-LAW and commented on her looks. I wonder what the FIL said to the UPS guy...Like, "she's married to my son" or what. I bet there's more to this story than just the UPS guy. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 "Meant to be together" ??? WTF kind of deluded pathological justification is that for adultery? There is no "meant" to be together - relationships, especially marriages, take work and commitment to make them work. Commitment to make them work doesn't mean f*cking the UPS guy cause he winked at you when he brought your copy of "How to Self-Destruct Through Deception and Denial". Link to post Share on other sites
Porn_Guy Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 And to me it seems without giving it much thought she plans on opening the door to pandora's box to see what happens.... Will that box be delivered by UPS next-day air? Link to post Share on other sites
Fun2BMe Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 "Meant to be together" ??? WTF kind of deluded pathological justification is that for adultery? There is no "meant" to be together - relationships, especially marriages, take work and commitment to make them work. Commitment to make them work doesn't mean f*cking the UPS guy cause he winked at you when he brought your copy of "How to Self-Destruct Through Deception and Denial". People who are in love mutually don't have to "work" at it, they just love each other and things fall into place. Those who try to keep a failing relationship together 'work' at it because one or both are not in love with the other. If they have chemistry and also like each other and have in common that they are not happy in their marriage, they would probably end up happy together is all I am saying. I am not saying they should cheat, but if they want to be together, maybe they have to start thinking about the steps they need to take to do it. Maybe they were meant to be and he came into her life by ending up being her UPS delivery person. Why should they deny and suppress this fact? That would be a recipe "to Self-Destruct Through Deception and Denial." As far as the FIL, he is probably suspicious of their relationship and has probably already told his son - her husband- that the UPS guy thinks she's hot. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 People who are in love mutually don't have to "work" at it, they just love each other and things fall into place. Really? Yes, people just love each other, but staying together for decades doesn't just fall into place. Falling in love happens by itself; staying in love involves work, and being LOVING toward the person you love. It involves making choices where you put your partner above a momentary whim of an attraction. I challenge you to find one couple who's been married for a long time who will say it requires NO WORK and everything just fell into place. Do you know what work is? It means saying NO to every UPS guy who winks at you. Those who try to keep a failing relationship together 'work' at it because one or both are not in love with the other. It's not all or nothing. There are many points in between the honeymoon phase and not being in love anymore. It's called LIFE. And to get past some of those points, yes, it takes commitment and work. Deciding that you're just not in love anymore and you should f*ck the next guy who looks at you just because you've been having a little trouble communicating, or one of you is going through some depression or other issues is not any kind of commitment. If they have chemistry and also like each other and have in common that they are not happy in their marriage, they would probably end up happy together is all I am saying. I am not saying they should cheat, but if they want to be together, maybe they have to start thinking about the steps they need to take to do it. You would start to make plans to end a marriage because you have some chemistry with someone? Really? Just because you get married doesn't mean you will never ever ever be attracted to anyone else. ARe you supposed to act on every attraction with a divorce? Maybe they were meant to be and he came into her life by ending up being her UPS delivery person. Why should they deny and suppress this fact? That would be a recipe "to Self-Destruct Through Deception and Denial."Because, when you're married, you do not act on every UPS guy that comes to your door. That's why it's called a commitment. You can admit to yourself that you think he's cute. You can even vibrate to him all night long if you want. But you do not act because you have made a vow to be with your husband. Meant to be together is romantic nonsense that makes people think it's ok to cheat Link to post Share on other sites
Lostgurl Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 People who are in love mutually don't have to "work" at it, they just love each other and things fall into place. Those who try to keep a failing relationship together 'work' at it because one or both are not in love with the other. If they have chemistry and also like each other and have in common that they are not happy in their marriage, they would probably end up happy together is all I am saying. I am not saying they should cheat, but if they want to be together, maybe they have to start thinking about the steps they need to take to do it. Maybe they were meant to be and he came into her life by ending up being her UPS delivery person. Why should they deny and suppress this fact? That would be a recipe "to Self-Destruct Through Deception and Denial." As far as the FIL, he is probably suspicious of their relationship and has probably already told his son - her husband- that the UPS guy thinks she's hot. EVERYONE that breathes has problems. Family members have problems, friends have problems, couples have problems! When 2 people are married or in a relationship... They have to be in love to want to work at it and make the relationship work. Link to post Share on other sites
Sup Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Will that box be delivered by UPS next-day air? Nah. That's Fed Ex. By the way, I have this feeling that she's not gonna post again, my first post musta scared her off. Hmmmm...... That makes the third one this week..... Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 People who are in love mutually don't have to "work" at it, they just love each other and things fall into place. Those who try to keep a failing relationship together 'work' at it because one or both are not in love with the other. A marriage, a relationship, actually ANY relationship is work. Work in progress as some say...It's how a relationship continues to grow and blossom! With no effort made, no reason to make things even better that is when people grow apart, stop talking, listening to eachother. Link to post Share on other sites
ilmw Posted January 12, 2007 Share Posted January 12, 2007 Really? Yes, people just love each other, but staying together for decades doesn't just fall into place. Falling in love happens by itself; staying in love involves work, and being LOVING toward the person you love. It involves making choices where you put your partner above a momentary whim of an attraction. I challenge you to find one couple who's been married for a long time who will say it requires NO WORK and everything just fell into place. Do you know what work is? It means saying NO to every UPS guy who winks at you. It's not all or nothing. There are many points in between the honeymoon phase and not being in love anymore. It's called LIFE. And to get past some of those points, yes, it takes commitment and work. Deciding that you're just not in love anymore and you should f*ck the next guy who looks at you just because you've been having a little trouble communicating, or one of you is going through some depression or other issues is not any kind of commitment. You would start to make plans to end a marriage because you have some chemistry with someone? Really? Just because you get married doesn't mean you will never ever ever be attracted to anyone else. ARe you supposed to act on every attraction with a divorce? Because, when you're married, you do not act on every UPS guy that comes to your door. That's why it's called a commitment. You can admit to yourself that you think he's cute. You can even vibrate to him all night long if you want. But you do not act because you have made a vow to be with your husband. Meant to be together is romantic nonsense that makes people think it's ok to cheat That was a realy good post... "dito"!! Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts