am i being the typical jealous girlfriend?

[hopelesslyinlove07]

about two weeks ago i found out that my boyfriend (of 3 years) has been "friends" with his ex girlfriend (of four months) for the past fve plus months.

 

he says that they are just friends but i cant help but think that if something didn't happen, it would have happened. i saw his phone bill, he was messaging this girl more than he messages me. he has been to the pub with her on numerous occassions and has also be to her house.

 

he says he didn't tell me because he knew i wouldn't like it because i dont like her. when this happened we have a huge chat and bascially i said that at this stage i couldn't handle their friendship and that i think they should back off from one another so we can work on our relationship.

 

he was very resistant to this but he did promise me that he would be honest with me and not go behind my back and to not see her for awhile.

 

well sunday just gone, i found out that he organised for her and him to go out for lunch. he says that he was going to tell her that they needed to cool things off for awhile, but he also told me he didn't do that.

 

i dont trust this girl. she told him she has a boyfriend, but i found out other wise. she knew that i didn't like her and that i didn't know he was going behind my back to see her.

 

i'm really upset, he has really hurt me, but he still cant understand why i dont like their friendship.

 

please help, am i being too over protective

 

i would love to hear opinions from both males and females

 

thanks, sorry its soo long

[Sevenmack]

You're not being a jealous girlfriend; he's screwing around on you with this girl and he's been keeping it a secret. While I don't condone looking at someone's phone bills, he's left himself open to such actions by not being faithful. Simply put, he's not worth your time.

 

Don't bother with discussing this with him further; he's not going to tell you anything. Just dump him. Dump him quick. And move on.

 

There's nothing I can say to soothe your aching heart, but you can find better.

[whichwayisup]

Just ask him how he would feel if you had as much contact with your exboyfriend, like he has been with his exgf. My best bet is he'd be jealous, hurt and wondering WHY you're intouch with your ex.

 

Seems to him, it's more important that he keeps her friendship, rather than keeping YOU happy.

 

He needs to decide who is more important to him. You or her. Or, you can decide for him and break up with him.

 

What a fool.

[crazy_grl]

Dump him. I don't see any point in having the her or me battle. He's already chosen her twice.

 

Once when he starting seeing her and hiding it from you. If he had chosen you, he would have asked you if you were ok with it first. The second time was when he went behind your back and arranged lunch with her after lying and saying he wouldn't see her.

 

I'm not personally against being friends with exes. I am against hiding it though. It doesn't matter if he does just want to be friends with her. He put her ahead of you.

[Arabess]

I agree with the other posters that there is a difference between being friends with an ex and arranging 'private lunches' in secret. I wouldn't blame HER....I would blame HIM. She isn't the one in your heart....he is...and either he needs to work out whatever problem he has going on....or you are better off without him. If you don't make this decision now....then you are destined to a life with him full of lies and unhappiness. Some guys, and girls, are just like that. It's like they have some personal psychotic need to keep everyone hanging in limbo around them. Maybe it's their way of fulfilling some need for attention.

 

I really don't know and I really wouldn't care. I would tell him to straighten up or get the fark out of my life.