I'm not sure what's going on. Any insight?

[Cthulhu1016]

Hello! I'm a new poster. I have questions.

 

My best friend is a girl I've known for five years. We've never done anything sexual or been interested in each other. We started living together as friends in 2002. We had a one year lease, but after about 6 months we

started hating each other and getting on each other's nerves. Eventually we moved apart. Recently I moved two doors down from her. Things are going on and I'm interested in hearing what everyone thinks.

 

When we started living together five years ago, she was dating someone. Eventually that turned bad and she broke up with him. I helped her through the breakup by taking her place and doing nice things for her. I'm not sure how things started, but eventually I started giving her nightly foot rubs which evolved into nightly calf and foot rubs, then full leg rubs. This went on even while we were fighting. Then I started giving her back rubs, which became upper body rubs, which turned into her taking her shirt off (not the bra) while I massaged her whole upper body (never touched her boobs). Evetually she met someone else near the end of our lease and we both moved out. We kind of drifted apart.

 

Four years later we start hanging out again. Eventually she dumps the guy (not because of me). Then I moved in two doors down. We're at each other's places a lot. We see each other eight hours a day. I'm over at her place playing video games until she falls asleep every night. The foot rubs have started again. Last nght I was rubbing her thighs all the way up to her butt (inner thighs, etc.) Last few days she's come over wearng pants, but last night she came over in her PJ shorts. Her feet were on my lap during this and I got stimulated. She didn't say anything about me touching her so far up or about what she could obviously feel with her feet.

 

Sometimes she's distant and mean to me. I'm her only friend she's like this to. She told me the that the other day. Stragers always think we're a couple (we bicker like old people a lot). We had someone tell us the other night that there was a tension between us. I've noticed it too.

 

I'm not really that interested in her, I'm not opposed to anything though. She goes WAY out of her way to avoid any topic that has to do with me being a sexual person to the point of being overly obvious. I get a weird vibe from her tone. It's hard to explain.

 

So, anyone have any idea what's going on with her? Is she just getting a cheap thrill from the physical contact (I kind of am)? I don't mind touching a pretty girl, so I'm cool with it, but it doesn't seem like something opposite sex friends do. I don't want to misread things, but it seems like she keeps putting herself out there and doesn't want to make a move. I mean, I'm rubbing her thighs and nearly her butt last night and she's fully aware of what I'm doing and doesn't say anything. I'm curious about what her motives are. Is she just oblivious? I'm not opposed to doing something, but I'm not sure how far to take things. I don't want to misread things.

[typical]

Is she just oblivious?

 

Quite obviously, no.

 

I'm not really that interested in her, I'm not opposed to anything though.

 

I think that is what is going on with her too. She's not really that interested, but not opposed to anything either.

 

Kinda like the down time to fill the void type of thing. I dont think she feels that much of a sexual stirring for you, but doesnt mind riling you up, which in turn will make her stimulated as well.

 

Its not so much you, as it is the contact, if you understand.

[Cthulhu1016]

I understand. That's kind of what I was assuming. Out of curiosity, does it seem like a bad idea to escalate things? I keep pushing the limits and I'm curious how far she'll let this go (there's not too much further to go...). Like I said, I'm not opposed to anything. I just can't read how far she wants to take this.

 

Actually, back when we were doing this years ago, I was grabbing her butt one night (under her shorts). The next day I asked her about it, I don't remember how I worded it, but she didn't remember and must've been asleep. She kind of acted that way this morning after I posted.

 

We've both been posting to our blogs about how horny we've been with warnings to each other "Sexual Content Don't Read This." She's read mine (her excuse was she thought I was messing with her and she got tempted) and I've read hers.

 

I don't know. We're both obviously horny and lonely (we went through break ups at the same time, too), and we're doing this kind of stuff (this just seems REALLY passive/aggresive). That's why I want to know if I should escalate it.

[Cthulhu1016]

This is an update for the past week. We've still been doing the massages thing, I never escalated things. It didn't seem right. She's getting more clingy though. She'll talk about doing things alone or being alone (we see each other 8+ hours a day), but then when she has to go do them, she winds up asking me to go with her or she'll invite me over. I'll have to go to class and she gets all freaked out and tries to get me to ditch to stay with her.

 

The other night we got drunk and we were talking about how she's mean to me sometimes (the other day she admitted to me I'm the only friend she acts "mean" towards). Anyway, I asked her why she was mean to me and she said "I'm mean to protect myself." I asked her what she meant but she got a weird look and didn't answer. Ideas?