Author pricillia Posted January 28, 2007 Author Share Posted January 28, 2007 By too late , I mean that you were clearly just REACTING to something he did , it was not some descision you came to on your own (to have him leave you alone) , thus just a reactive action . But I guess any way you do it , as long as you are willing to hold to your descision. Possibly I can see your point...but at the same time I can not just be waiting for him he needed to know that I will not always be there weather he wanted me to or not... I was trying to be patient with him but at the same time it made me feel like I was a fool in a sense. He obviously does not care about me or he would have called. For me with him I was so supportive and loving but not smothering.... Bottom line is he lied to me and I forgave him, if he did not want to see me any longer he should have told me... I don't know what the case is, I know he is miserable... I saw it in his face last night I saw it in his eyes. But right now I have to think about myself and getting to where I need to be... If he needed a friend I would be there but I would be carefull... He needs to know I am a strong woman!!! Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 You are a strong woman! It doens't matter if you were reacting to him or not...You need to think about yourself and getting to where you want to go... Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 28, 2007 Author Share Posted January 28, 2007 MM told me that he thinks that returning his things was gheto... opinions??? I am so frustrated Link to post Share on other sites
whichwayisup Posted January 28, 2007 Share Posted January 28, 2007 I then proceeded to walk away and looked back and he looked so mad, and shocked at the same time. Good for you! MM told me that he thinks that returning his things was gheto... Uhmm, sorry...What's gheto? I don't know what that means, in this context. Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 Good for you! Uhmm, sorry...What's gheto? I don't know what that means, in this context. That the way that I handled this was the wrong way. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 That the way that I handled this was the wrong way. Yeah, whatever. The way he's handled this has been wrong from the start - lying to you about being married. Who cares if he thinks you giving him back his hat is wrong? It's not like he has the best judment of right and wrong. Seriously, P, I know you care for this man, but step back and look at him for what he is: a married two-timer who's blaming you for being upset that he's a married two-timer who has stopped making you happy (if he ever really did make you happy). Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 Yeah, whatever. The way he's handled this has been wrong from the start - lying to you about being married. Who cares if he thinks you giving him back his hat is wrong? It's not like he has the best judment of right and wrong. Seriously, P, I know you care for this man, but step back and look at him for what he is: a married two-timer who's blaming you for being upset that he's a married two-timer who has stopped making you happy (if he ever really did make you happy). He also said that I disrespect who ever I want when ever I want??? Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 Ok, he just has problems and is turning it around on you...Stand up for yourself!!! He's been disrespecting you! Ignore what he says and know that you got to him... Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 He also said that I disrespect who ever I want when ever I want??? Again, whatever. Consider the source. Link to post Share on other sites
addicted2love Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 My advice...ignore him! They hate that! I bet if you go on with your life like he was never even in it and he sees you happy without him it will drive him nuts! It seems to be working for me. The more I ignore him the more he comes around. You're a strong woman...you can do it...it's time to take your power back. I know all about feeling like the puppy that gets kicked and comes back for more. We love these dumb men for what ever reason but when we take that love away they freak out! Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 My advice...ignore him! They hate that! I bet if you go on with your life like he was never even in it and he sees you happy without him it will drive him nuts! It seems to be working for me. The more I ignore him the more he comes around. You're a strong woman...you can do it...it's time to take your power back. I know all about feeling like the puppy that gets kicked and comes back for more. We love these dumb men for what ever reason but when we take that love away they freak out! Yes you explained it perfectly...the puppy that gets kicked and comes back for more... but I feel like the puppy in a sense... Green Eyed... he is turning it around on me and I think that I did hurt him which was not my intention but I just think that he needs to wake up. We got into a coversation and he brougt up that the security guard saw us talking and he will probably get into trouble and I said no... he came to talk to me after I talked to you just doing his rounds... I told him that I was talking to the security guard and he said oh maybe he can take you out tonight, what the hell was that all about??? Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 We got into a coversation and he brougt up that the security guard saw us talking and he will probably get into trouble and I said no... he came to talk to me after I talked to you just doing his rounds...I told him that I was talking to the security guard and he said oh maybe he can take you out tonight, what the hell was that all about??? He is just jealous and trying to make it YOUR FAULT...WHICH IT IS NOT your fault...TURN it BACK on HIM...he is the one who ignores you and is rude to you...throw his own behavior back at him, meaning tell him how he doesn't return your calls, or he makes weird comments etc... Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 He is just jealous and trying to make it YOUR FAULT...WHICH IT IS NOT your fault...TURN it BACK on HIM...he is the one who ignores you and is rude to you...throw his own behavior back at him, meaning tell him how he doesn't return your calls, or he makes weird comments etc... He said that he is not my friend anymore and that I know what he means and that I returned his things and even though I apoligized he said that I...yes I keep on doing things and I keep on saying I am sorry but I can only say I am sorry so much... Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 He said that he is not my friend anymore and that I know what he means and that I returned his things and even though I apoligized he said that I...yes I keep on doing things and I keep on saying I am sorry but I can only say I am sorry so much... and then he asked my why I look so good, why am I dressed up today... I have on a pair of jeans and boots with heals and a black v-lin shirt on past my hips and my hair is up in a pony... I really did not make that much of an effort today. Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 You shouldn't be sorry for anything, HE is the ONE who should be sorry...So make him sorry P!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 You shouldn't be sorry for anything, HE is the ONE who should be sorry...So make him sorry P!!! and how do I do that... Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 Don't fall into his blame game...turn it back on him...and look really good every time you see him... Link to post Share on other sites
stillhere Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 and then he asked my why I look so good, why am I dressed up today... I have on a pair of jeans and boots with heals and a black v-lin shirt on past my hips and my hair is up in a pony... I really did not make that much of an effort today. P, he's worried that you are out on the prowl for a new man already. He needs to listen to that song by Beyonce, Irreplacable. You can find someone easily and he's afraid of that. Do like GEL said, turn it back on him and look smokin hot every time you see him. Give him a little taste of what he'll never have again!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 Don't fall into his blame game...turn it back on him...and look really good every time you see him... He is the one that is married, I have forgiven him and his moods more times that I can count, I feel that I have been understanding and patient up until this thursday...and I think that everything else got to me, and returning the things that he gave me hurt him because he keeps on bringing it up.... I know that may not have been the smartest thing here becuase I know how sensitive he is but I forgave him so many times... He tests me thinks I am not faithfull to him, I know I know:rolleyes: gets upset for no reason because of jealousy and ends it with me, I think since we have been toghether he has ended it three times, but I have always forgivin him... Link to post Share on other sites
addicted2love Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 Girlfriend...listen to your LS sisters they would never steer you wrong! Always look your best...but do it for you, when you look good you feel good. Don't tell him your sorry...he's the one who's sorry...sorry he messed with the wrong girl! The one that is smokin hot and won't take his sh*t! The puppy comment was meant to be about us OW. We are the puppies that keep coming back for more! If you do the things we are telling you HE will become the puppy! It's a stupid game...but men love to play it! That's why our mothers always said to "play hard to get!" And by the way....talk to whom ever you please darlin....if he's jealous that's HIS problem! Link to post Share on other sites
GreenEyedLady Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 You know what P, it is HIS problem...you need to just stop him in his tracks...don't be sorry, or feel sorry...TAKE what you deserve and that is respect... And P, I've been thinking, is he really worth it? What need does he fill of yours? You don't have to tell us, just think about it, K... Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 You know what P, it is HIS problem...you need to just stop him in his tracks...don't be sorry, or feel sorry...TAKE what you deserve and that is respect... And P, I've been thinking, is he really worth it? What need does he fill of yours? You don't have to tell us, just think about it, K... I did talk to him last night...I told him that the whole situation is really starting to get to me, he then said that maybe we should just end it... Started talking about his child(children) not sure which... and that he needs to think of him (them) right now. That I have been doing things to push him away. There is more but I am so tired right now I can not even tell the story... Just that he respects me and cares about me and he does not want me to feel bad and he has been feeling bad... He said it was over for good...humph... I wonder when the heck am I going to be good enough for someone that I am in love with... I know the above statement is not a healthy way to think but that is what has been running through my mind. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 I wonder when the heck am I going to be good enough for someone that I am in love with... I know the above statement is not a healthy way to think but that is what has been running through my mind. It's not healthy because your relationships failed because the men were married, not because you weren't good enough for them. They weren't good enough for you, nor did you ever have a chance for them to succeed because those men weren't available in the first place. Link to post Share on other sites
Author pricillia Posted January 29, 2007 Author Share Posted January 29, 2007 It's not healthy because your relationships failed because the men were married, not because you weren't good enough for them. They weren't good enough for you, nor did you ever have a chance for them to succeed because those men weren't available in the first place. Yes I know, I have known it all along!!! If he told me in the beginning I would never have gone out with him!!! Not that I was so so happy but at least, well at least I would not have fallen in love. I just don't get it why am I in love with him anyway, I feel like I have been running a marathon for 10 months...without reaching any goal or destination... Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted January 29, 2007 Share Posted January 29, 2007 Yes I know, I have known it all along!!! If he told me in the beginning I would never have gone out with him!!! Not that I was so so happy but at least, well at least I would not have fallen in love. I just don't get it why am I in love with him anyway, I feel like I have been running a marathon for 10 months...without reaching any goal or destination... That's a good question - why did you fall for him in the beginning? What did he do for you that made you really like him, so much that you started to have feelings for him? What needs did he fill? Link to post Share on other sites
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