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Weird thing happened...


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The other night it was my BF's birthday. I took him out for dinner and drinks at this little place...that I had picked out beforehand because he doesn't like the club scene nor does he like overcrowded places. So we sit down and order. Half way through our dinner and a few drinks in (I'm tipsy - at least) he starts freaking out (quietly) that I am getting bored in our relationship and of him. He said that I was looking around - I was looking at the basketball game behind him on the TV to be able to tell him the score - and the fact that I was talking about basketball with him(his favorite sport) means that I am getting bored of him because I should have other things to talk about!? He then suggested that he leave and that I call someone from work to come and pick me up (I work at a casino, midnights shift - with all guys) and I go out and have some real fun. I of course hadn't even thought of it.

So we get in the car to leave - and I start to cry - I had such high hopes for the night - he says that he is sorry that he is such an ass...then he suggest we stop on the way home and get a movie....we do and the rest of the night is quiet but tense. Then I am woken up the next morning to him beside me in bed wanting to have sex which we do and then everything is back to normal with him...

What thew hell happened?!?

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Well, sounds like he's insecure in your relationship.

 

What do you think about what he said? He thinks you are losing interest in him - are you?

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No I'm not losing interest at all - if anything I am more attracted to him and more in love with him than I ever have been. That's what the whole basketball talk was all about - I think sometimes that I don't take enough interest in things that he is interested in - I was trying to make his birthday all about him. I don't know what I can do to make him feel more secure - I tell him I love him all the time, we spend lots of time together, I am very interested in him sexually....

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Is he an insecure guy in general? Could he be jealous of all the guys you meet at your casino job?

 

Or, might he be projecting...is he losing interest in you?

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Yes, I would say that he insecure tendencies....and I don't get the feeling that he is losing interest in me - he is extremely interested and loving...and as for my job I am very open about it - even inviting him to meet anyone that I work with - am I doing somethign wrong - I don't want him feeling this way

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If he has insecure tendencies, there isn't much you can do. Security and confidence comes from within. You can continue to reassure him, but if he doesn't believe he's worthy of love, he'll always be wondering if you'll leave him.

 

You can try talking to him again - explain to him why you talked of basketball and that you love him more than ever. Maybe he can explain better what he was thinking.

 

Could he be upset about his birthday? Some people freak out at birthdays because they don't like getting older.

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I think that may be part of it - but I mean he's only 26! :)

I'm going to talk to him about it tonight when the night wears down and we are cuddled in bed...

Thanks for the great insight and advice norajane....

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